Bug's Bleat - - GCF: Teenagers Are Always Hungry

Volume 9, Issue 21 Friday, May 25, 2007

Hello All,

It was a “GREAT” weekend for the Blossom Festival. Fifty-Two teams competed with “Woods” of Camden winning. Albemarle placed third in rig construction (we did rebuild the old cooker this year. No major changes just repaired and refinished it.)
~~~~~
This wasn't sent to me by another person or list, nor was it found posted elsewhere. It's just a few thoughts about a holiday which is special to me. It's one of those few times when I share something serious instead of humorous. -Tom
If this was forwarded to you, please consider your own subscription to Good Clean Fun. It's free! A smile will enhance the quality of your life. Just send an email to: good-clean-fun-subscribe@yahoogroups.com or visit the Good Clean Fun web site http://www.kcbx.net/~tellswor/ UNSUBSCRIBE INFO for Good Clean Fun is at the end of this email. This email was scanned by Norton AntiVirus before it was sent.
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GCF: Memorial Day 2007

The joke for today has been sent. I want to be serious for a moment and talk about the holiday which will be celebrated here in the United States on Monday.

Memorial Day is on the last Monday in May and honors those men and women who lost their lives serving their country. What we observe as Memorial Day today began at the end of the Civil War. Family members of the many soldiers slain in battle would visit the grave sites of their fallen relatives or friends and decorate the graves with flowers.

On May 5, 1868, General John Logan proclaimed this day a holiday through his General Order No. 11. The day was entitled Decoration Day and was first observed on May 30, 1868. The northern states celebrated this day every year, but the southern states celebrated a day similar to this on a different day until sometime after World War I.

In 1882, the name Decoration day was changed to Memorial Day, and in 1971, Memorial Day was declared a national holiday to be held on the last Monday of May every year. Over the years it has come to serve as a day to remember all U.S. men and women killed or missing in action in all wars.

I am truly grateful for the freedoms which we enjoy today. Too often, we take these gifts for granted, little realizing the sacrifice which was involved in ensuring that these freedoms continue to be a part of all of our lives. Be honest, how many of us think of Memorial Day as just another chance for a three-day weekend? A chance to go the lakes or beaches or mountains? A trip to Disneyland or Six Flags or some other amusement park?

If you are here in the United States, please remember to display the flag, not just for the day but for the whole weekend. Let's not forget the real reason for having this holiday. The quote below says it all. Please take the time to read it.
Take care everyone. - - Tom - - (HM2, USN 65-69)
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"It is, in a way, an odd thing to honor those who died in defense of our country in wars far away. The imagination plays a trick. We see these soldiers in our mind as old and wise. We see them as something like the Founding Fathers, grave and gray-haired. But most of them were boys when they died, they gave up two lives -- the one they were living and the one they would have lived. When they died, they gave up their chance to be husbands and fathers and grandfathers. They gave up their chance to be revered old men. They gave up everything for their county, for us. All we can do is remember."

-- Ronald Wilson Reagan
Remarks at Veteran's Day ceremony, Arlington National Cemetery
Arlington, Virginia, November 11, 1985
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In the past, I have had several links at GCF to Andy Hefty, Former Sergeant of Marines.

This time, Andy provides his thoughts on some appropriate ways to observe (not celebrate) Memorial Day. The column is entitled "Memorial Day - A Proper Perspective" and can be found at the following web address:

http://www.jacksonville.com/community/cc/hefty/stories/052107/052107084505.shtml

Andy's words are well written.
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I try and find something appropriate to add to this email each Memorial Day. This year I am using something sent to me by Barb, who shared the story of the return of a hero to a small town in Missouri, where it doesn't matter what time of the day or night a hero comes home.

In short form, the story is: California, Missouri is a small town of 4000 people located in the middle of the state. This is the area that was the home to young Leon Deraps, who enlisted in the Marine Corps upon high school graduation. At the age of 19, Deraps was killed while conducting combat operations with the 7th Engineer Support Battalion, 1st Marine Logistics Group, in the al-Anbar Province of Iraq. When his body was returned home, it was very early in the morning, yet hundreds of friends, family and supporters from that Missouri community met at 2:00 AM to welcome their local hero, Marine Lance Cpl. Leon Deraps, back home from Iraq. Despite the early morning hour, the 12-mile stretch of Highway 87 between Jamestown and California was lined with flags and luminaries and nearly every driveway played host to at least one person as the procession traveled through at minimal speed.

The whole story with photos is posted at the following web address:

http://gatewaypundit.blogspot.com/2006/05/at-200-am-in-small-missouri-town.html
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A final thought: Let's not forget those who made the ultimate sacrifice. They are remembered in all our prayers. Also, let's not forget a prayer for the safety of all service men and women, whether they serve at home or overseas. Finally, a heartfelt Semper Fi from this former Hospital Corpsman is sent to all the Marines I knew. -Tom
~~~~~
The True Meaning of Memorial Day
Today's Safety From the Heart message is from Pam Kemp.

ROBERT THOMAS JOHNSON is honored on Panel 27W, Row 6 of the Vietnam Veterans Memorial.

Date of Birth: 10/13/1948
Date of Casualty: 4/3/1969
Home of Record: LITTLE ROCK
State: AR
Branch of Service: ARMY
Rank: SGT
Casualty Country: SOUTH VIETNAM
Casualty Province: THUA THIEN

Putting a face w/a name on the Wall always helps me to have a deeper understanding of loss and knowledge. The stats you read on this 20-yr-old young man are those of my husband - Robert T. Johnson-

When you read this, remember all of the young men and women who have made the ultimate sacrifice so that you and I could get up this morning....by our own free will...and carry on w/our day in whatever way we choose....Pray for those who defend us this day and in the days to come and for their families...and remember, it takes this type of sacrifice in order to keep us free......................God Bless the USA ...

Have a happy Memorial Day but remember always why we have the privilege to celebrate this day.
~~~~~
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY!!
"The American Indians found out what happens when you don't control immigration."
~~~~~
We’ve “rediscovered” Andy Capp. The Banner News quit carrying him several years ago but I looked him up “on line” recently and have been rewarded with some really great humor. One of my recent favorites shows Andy looking out the window and he turns to Flo and says “What a beautiful day. I might do a spot of gardening this afternoon.” Flo looks to the reader and says; “At a nearby airfield, a squadron of pigs prepares for take-off.”
~~~~~
Our Recipe this week is Glazed Spinach Salad Recipe courtesy of Rachael Ray. No, I don’t like spinach but its healthy and looked good, if you like spinach.
Believe it or not, I’m a “picky” eater. Aunt Gerry taught me this.
She was cooking calf liver, onions and spinach one day when we were playing at her house. I told her that I wanted to eat with her that day. She asked me if I liked liver and I replied “Sure.” So she fixed me a plate and I learned that I didn’t like some things, like liver, onions and spinach.
Aunt Gerry also taught me that cats didn’t necessarily like to swim. I learned this when she came out the door and walked over to the horse trough to see what I was doing. She was surprised to find her cat’s new kittens thrashing around in the trough. She asked me how the kittens got there and I replied “They climbed in to go swimming.”
It was then that she displayed her powers of deduction that could rival Sherlock Holmes. She pointed out that the trough was three foot high with inwardly sloping walls, made of concrete (Henry Lee had used some of that new fangled “sakcrete” to build this water trough.) Then she went on to educate me on the fact that Cats weren’t fond of “swimming.”
I never could get away with anything.
~~~~~
Jules, Matt and I spent Friday pulling wire at MCC. We now have Camera 2 “hardwired” into the wall to the right of the stage. Complete with the intercom line.
Jules and I finished trouble shooting the intercom Saturday evening after Ryan and Kami’s wedding reception.
~~~~~
Speaking of China, I heard a bit on NPR Sunday about a couple who lived a year eating only what was produced within 100 miles of their home. Two comments they made: 1) we missed chocolate and 2) everything tastes better when it's fresher.
Mulling over that second comment, I thought, maybe our "Mass Consumption" ways are the root of our obesity problem. The food we eat really doesn't have too much flavor. Most of it is frozen, picked before it ripens, etc. I hear all the time "that didn't satisfy me." They may be full but they keep eating trying to get some flavor or taste. If we ate fresh foods, maybe we'd be satisfied with less?

~~~~~
Farmers Bank & Trust offers "Every Day Hero Checking"

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Thanks to Jason Sands - - Mt Vernon VFD - - 870.562.3496chief2@mtvernonvfd.orgProud
~~~~~
We strongly encourage you to read Michael Yon. You’re not getting the whole story on the War without reading outside the “MSM” offerings.
“Bug”
~
Greetings,

Interesting developments in Iraq.

A new dispatch, Maysan [http://www.michaelyon-online.com/wp/maysan.htm], is published on the site.

Next in the queue is a series of dispatches called Death or Glory, which is also the motto of the Queen's Royal Lancers, the British unit I met up with as the ceremony described in Maysan concluded.

I am currently near Haddamiya in Anbar Province with a small team of our Marines. In the last week, there was one attempted IED, but the locals tipped off the Iraqi police and together with the Iraqi Army, a handful of Marines captured one of the suspected perpetrators.

Other than that minor event, there has been no drama whatsoever in this area for more than a week. I hear more birds singing than bullets flying. Of course, that doesn't make for exciting news, so that might explain why I don't see many reporters out here in Anbar now.

Interest in the war is waning back home, I'm told, and that may also explain the thinning ranks of reporters over here. But without reader support I can't continue indefinitely.

Reader support keeps my boots on the ground here and my readers will determine how long I am able to continue this work. I have not taken a penny from Fox, any television or other outlets to fund this year-long trip.

Ironically, with fewer reporters here every day, it seems even more critical to insure that the news flows from those sources we do have on the ground. So, please continue to spread the word about my work and please consider supporting this site by clicking [http://gallery.michaelyon-online.com/index.php?main_page=product_info&cPath=9&products_id=47].

Very Respectfully,

Michael Yon
~~~~~
Congratulations to Todd and Katja Stephens on the birth of their first child!
Lucas Carpenter Stephens was born Sunday, May 20, at 1:52 p.m. He weighed 7 lbs, 2.5 oz. and was 20 inches long.
~~~~~
Recipe(s) of the week - Glazed Spinach Salad Recipe courtesy Rachael Ray


3 tablespoons extra-virgin olive oil, 3 turns of the pan
1 large shallot, chopped
2 tablespoons rice wine vinegar, a couple of splashes
1 tablespoon soy sauce, eyeball it
1/4 cup Chinese duck or plum sauce, eyeball it
A few dashes hot sauce
1 ½ pounds triple washed spinach, coarsely chopped
Salt and pepper
1 tablespoon toasted sesame seeds, available on International foods aisle


Heat the extra-virgin olive oil, 3 turns of the pan, in a deep skillet over medium heat. Add shallots to hot oil and sauté them for 2 minutes. Add vinegar and soy and whisk into duck sauce. Reduce heat to low. Add hot sauce to dressing and pile in half the spinach. Turn spinach carefully with tongs. When it wilts down, 2 minutes, add the remaining greens and wilt. Season the warm salad with salt and pepper to your taste. Serve the spinach with toasted sesame seeds sprinkled over top


Recipe Summary
Difficulty: Easy
Prep Time: 2 minutes
Cook Time: 5 minutes
Yield: 6 servings


http://www.foodnetwork.com/food/recipes/recipe/0,1977,FOOD_9936_33305,00.html
~~~~~
MapQuest Gas Prices, Pretty Cool http://gasprices.mapquest.com
~~~~~
The photos on the front of this week’s “Bleat” include shots of our Albemarle Grill, Float and Kerry Franks as “Razorback man.”
~~~~~
Don’t forget to check out www.mcc2000.net
~~~~~
If you’d like to write Dr. Antoon, he’d like to hear from you. This is his current address, the latest of the three federal prisons’ he’s been in.
Patrick Antoon #06669-010
Federal Prison Camp-La Tuna
P. O. Box 8000
Anthony, NM/TX 88021
~~~~~
We’ve now got several addresses on the web for "Da Bleat." For the latest issue, go to http://www.bugsbleat.blogspot.com
Our photos are posted at http://www.bugsbleatphotos.blogspot.com.
~~~~~
Feel free to share the "Bleat" with any and all. That's why we publish it.
~~~~~
BreakPoint
With Chuck Colson

Back to the Beginning
By Mark Earley
5/25/2007
AD 33

This commentary was delivered by Prison Fellowship President Mark Earley.

This week the Church celebrates Pentecost—or at least it’s supposed to. But to many, even in the Church, Pentecost has just become a word on the calendar, representing an isolated incident in the Bible, with little application to our lives.

To refocus our attention on what Pentecost means, I suggest Colin Duriez’s new book, AD 33: The Year That Changed the World. Duriez takes on the ambitious task of examining what this one momentous year meant to various people and groups around the world. The resulting book sheds light not just on the way things happened during the founding of the Church, but on what those things mean today.

And one of the events he highlights is the coming of the Holy Spirit at Pentecost, when “something mysterious and yet real entered the spectacle of world history.” In that one startling, life-changing event, we see the transformation not just of individuals, but of the Church.

Duriez sums up some of the leading characteristics of the young Church in “the aftermath of the Pentecost”: “It becomes confessional, immersing itself in the narrative and doctrinal teaching of the Twelve. It is voluntarily communitarian . . . directed to social welfare and care.”

In short, the presence of the Holy Spirit taught believers to dedicate themselves fully to Christ’s two greatest commands: loving God and loving their neighbor.

It was this presence and these guidelines that kept the Church together through some of the growing pains described in Acts, such as the lies of Ananias and Sapphira, or the complaints of one group that their needy were being ignored.

Such deceptions and squabbles can tear even the closest group apart. The fact that this did not happen and that, on the contrary, the Church dealt effectively with these cases and continued to grow, is a clear testimony to the working of the Holy Spirit in the lives of Christ’s followers.

Little wonder that, as Duriez puts it, “[the Church’s] spontaneous primitive form, in the days, weeks and months after Pentecost, was to be seen in later centuries by reforming and revivalist movements in the church as an ideal to be restored.”

What sometimes discourages us, though, is how much the world has changed, and how much the Church has grown, since AD 33. So much of what worked then for a small group, with one set of leaders, sharing everything in common, seems no longer feasible for Christians today.

That’s why Duriez calls us not to focus on the specifics of the early Church’s situation, but on the principles that apply to all believers, in all places, and at all times. “It is worth noting,” he writes, “that the communitarianism of the early church is not ideological; that is, property is not the integrating factor. Rather the importance of property is relative in relation to the law of love, based on Jesus’ famous command to his disciples.”

If you’d like a refresher course on how the Church began, what it was then, and what it still can be, pick up AD 33. It’s a fascinating trip back to the beginning and a reminder of how the guidance and principles present at the beginning are still present and powerful today.

Colin Duriez, AD 33: The Year that Changed the World (InterVarsity Press, 2007).
John H. Armstrong, “What Does It Mean to Bear the Cross in the West?” Worldview Church, March 2007.
T.M. Moore, “People of the Book?: The Ministry of the Word in Your Life,” BreakPoint Online, 22 May 2007.
Robert Lynn, “Half-Christians: Finding a Full Faith,” Worldview Church, April 2007.
BreakPoint Commentary No. 070406, “Echoes of Good Friday: Sacrificial Love.”
Richard John Neuhaus, Death on a Friday Afternoon (Basic, 2001).

The BreakPoint Web site and BreakPoint WorldView Magazine feature Colson’s commentaries as well as feature articles by other established and up-and-coming writers to equip readers with a biblical perspective on a variety of issues and topics.
© 2004-2006 Prison Fellowship
~~~~~
Words of the Week:
veritable: real; true; genuine.
furtive: obtained or characterized by stealth; sly; secret; stealthy.
insuperable: incapable of being passed over, surmounted, or overcome.
delectation: great pleasure; delight.
redolent: having or exuding fragrance; also, evocative, reminiscent.
polymath: a person of great or varied learning.
fiat: an arbitrary or authoritative command or order.
from Dictionary.Com

~~~~~
"To be prepared for war is one of the most effectual means of preserving peace." - George Washington

"Pythagoras, when he was asked what time was, answered that it was the soul of this world." - Plutarch

"Egotism is the anesthetic that dulls the pain of stupidity." - Frank Leahy

"The first sign of corruption in a society that is still alive is that the end justifies the means." - Georges Bernanos

"Loneliness is never more cruel than when it is felt in close propinquity with someone who has ceased to communicate." - Germaine Greer

"Our names are labels, plainly printed on the bottled essence of our past behavior." - Logan Pearsall Smith

"I shall earnestly and persistently continue to urge all women to the practical recognition of the old Revolutionary maxim. 'Resistance to tyranny is obedience to God.' " - Susan B. Anthony
~~~~~
BREAKING CHRISTIAN NEWS
http://breakingchristiannews.com/

# Little Boy Who Lost Leg in Lawn Mower Accident Relates How Jesus Came and Stayed With Him Until Doctors Took Over
# Survey Shows When People are Educated on What Roe v. Wade Does, it Loses Public Support
# Believers Encouraged to Go to Mountaintops to Pray on Global Day of Prayer
# Valerie Harper, "Rhoda," as Golda Meir in New Film

# Operation LifeShield to Launch Life-Saving Program Where Christians Can Stand with Israel by Helping Donate Transportable Bomb Shelters in High Risk Areas
# Stopping "Drive-Through" Mastectomies—a Breast Cancer Survivor Speaks Out
# Sharing Jesus on the Golf Course
# Thousands Expected to Participate in Grand Bahama's March for Jesus

# Melodic Genes: Molecular Biologists Convert Protein Sequences into Original Classical Music
# Baby Emilio goes Home to Jesus without Hospital Interference
# CELEBRATION 2007 Aims to Spread the Love of God in Canada
# The Amazing Healing Power of Forgiveness

# Majority of Residents Surveyed in Houston, Texas, Claim God as Their #1 Source of Health
# 17,000 Pack Stadium for Jerry Falwell's Memorial—Newt Gingrich Exhorts Students to Confront Radical Secularism
# The Iraqi War of Perception
# A Dream From God Starts Pastor on Journey of Repentance for "Critical Spirit"

# Cure for Hepatitis C Found?
# Cracking Down on Human Trafficking in the Empire State
# Prayer Alert: Zoo Monkey Dies of Bubonic Plague—5 Squirrels and a Rabbit also found Dead on Grounds
# The Reagan Diaries: a Look into the Former President's Thoughts and His Faith

# Prayer & Action Alert: Urge U.S. Representatives to Reauthorize Abstinence Funding
# Uptrend in Asian-American Involvement in Christian College Organizations
# With Permission of Police, Church Places Reflective Angels on Deadly Stretch of Highway and Sends Team to Pray Against Fatal Accidents
# Christian Legal Groups Help The American Legion Protect War Memorials With Christian Themes

# Iowa Soldier Wants Troops' Voices to be Heard in America
# Outrageous Bill Passes California Senate—SB 777 is a Serious Assault on Religious Freedom and Morality in Schools
# Global Day of Prayer on Pentecost Sunday—May 27th
# New Documentary Will Examine Heroic Acts and Miraculous Events that Have Moved the World to Tears and Features Miraculous True Stories from September 11th, 2001

Breaking Christian News
310 2nd Ave SE
Albany, Oregon 97321
541-928-2642
E-mail
US Orders: 1-866-358-7426

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GCF: Teenagers Are Always Hungry

Emailed to me another humor list (Good Clean Funnies List) -Tom To subscribe The Good Clean Funnies List, (not to be confused with this list, which is Good Clean Fun) send an email to: gcfl-request@gcfl.net with subject = add

If this was forwarded to you, please consider your own subscription to Good Clean Fun. It's free! A smile will enhance the quality of your life.
Just send an email to: good-clean-fun-subscribe@egroups.com or visit the Good Clean Fun web site http://www.kcbx.net/~tellswor/ UNSUBSCRIBE INFO for Good Clean Fun is at the end of this email. This email was scanned by Norton AntiVirus before it was sent.
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The parents in our cycling group were discussing the subject of teenagers and their appetites. Most agreed that teenagers would eat anything, anywhere and at any time. Some were concerned that such appetites always made it hard to judge when you should feed them because they were always grazing.

A veteran parent of six children told us of his method for judging the true hunger of teenagers.

"I would hold up a piece of cold, cooked broccoli, and if they were jumping and snapping at it, I figured they were hungry enough to be fed."
_ ____________________________ _

GCF: We Must Stop This Immediately!

Emailed to me from another humor list (Humor_G) -Tom To subscribe to Humor_G, send a blank email to: Humor_G-subscribe@yahoogroups.com
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Have you noticed that Stairs are getting steeper. Groceries are heavier. And, everything is farther away. Yesterday I walked to the corner and I was dumbfounded to discover how long our street had become!

And, you know, people are less considerate now, especially the young ones. They speak in whispers all the time! If you ask them to speak up they just keep repeating themselves, endlessly mouthing the same silent message until they're red in the face! What do they think I am, a lip reader?

I also think they are much younger than I was at the same age. On the other hand, people my own age are so much older than I am. I ran into an old friend the other day and she has aged so much that she didn't even recognize me.

I got to thinking about the poor dear while I was combing my hair this morning, and in doing so, I glanced at my own refection ... Well, REALLY NOW- even mirrors are not made the way they used to be!

Another thing, everyone drives so fast these days! You're risking life and limb if you happen to pull onto the freeway in front of them.. All I can say is, their brakes must wear out awfully fast, the way I see them screech and swerve in my rear view mirror.

Clothing manufacturers are less civilized these days. Why else would they suddenly start labeling a size 10 or 12 dress as 18 or 20? Do they think no one notices that these things no longer fit around the waist, hips, thighs, and bosom?

The people who make bathroom scales are pulling the same prank, but in reverse. Do they think I actually "believe" the number I see on that dial? HA! I would never let myself weigh that much! Just who do these people think they're fooling?

I'd like to call up someone in authority to report what's going on -- but the telephone company is in on the conspiracy too: they've printed the phone books in such small type that no one could ever find a number in here!

All I can do is pass along this warning: We are under attack! Unless something drastic happens, pretty soon everyone will have to suffer these awful indignities.

PLEASE PASS THIS ON TO EVERYONE YOU KNOW AS SOON AS POSSIBLE SO WE
CAN GET THIS CONSPIRACY STOPPED!

PS: I am sending this to you in a larger font size, because something has caused my computer's regular fonts to be smaller than they once were. (They must be sneaking to my house and messing around with my computer. Probably CIA ...!!!) Pretty scary stuff, huh!?!?!
_ ____________________________ _

GCF: How Old?

Emailed to me a friend (Thanks, Hannah) -Tom
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A grandfather asks his grandson: "How old are you?"

The grandson replies: "Five".

Grandfather says: "When I was your age I was six!"
_ ____________________________ _

GCF: Priest Twin

Emailed to me another humor list (Pastor Tim's Clean Laugh List) -Tom Subscribe to Pastor Tim's Clean Laugh list at the website: Subscribe
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Our parish priest suddenly became ill and asked his twin brother, also a priest, to fill in for him and conduct a funeral Mass scheduled for that day. His brother, of course, agreed.

It was not until the brother was accompanying the casket down the aisle, however, that he realized that he had neglected to ask the gender of the deceased. This was information that he would need for his remarks during the service.

Thinking quickly, as he approached the first pew where the deceased's relatives were seated, he nodded toward the casket and whispered to one woman, "Brother or sister?"

"Cousin," she replied.
_ ____________________________ _

GCF: Robbie's Move

Emailed to me from another humor list (You Make Me Laugh) -Tom To subscribe to You Make Me Laugh, send a blank email to: SUBSCRIBE-laugh@lists.crosswalk.com
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Used to being the center of attention, Robbie was a little more than jealous of his new baby sister. The parents sat him down and said that now that she was getting older, the house was too small and they'd have to move.

"It's no use." Robbie said, "She's crawling good now and she'd probably just follow us."
_ ____________________________ _
(((\ \>|_/ )______________________( \_| \\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ ////
\ / Money isn't everything. \ /
\ _/ There's credit cards, \_ /
/ / money orders, travelers checks..... \ \
(((\ \>|_/ )______________________( \_| \\\\ \_/ / Experience is that \ \_/ ////
\ / marvelous thing that \ /
\ _/ enables you recognize a mistake \_ /
/ / when you make it again. \ \
(((\ \>|_/ )______________________( \_| \\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ ////
\ / Always try to do things \ /
\ _/ in chronological order. \_ /
/ / It's less confusing that way. \ \
(((\ \>|_/ )______________________( \_| \\\\ \_/ / If you want to keep your \ \_/ ////
\ / friends or relatives \ /
\ _/ a safe distance away, \_ /
/ / just lend them some money. \ \
(((\ \>|_/ )______________________( \_| \\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ ////
\ / Murphy's Law isn't recursive. \ /
\ _/ Washing your car to \_ /
/ / make it rain doesn't work. \ \
_ ____________________________ _
| Thomas S. Ellsworth |
| tellswor@slonet.org |
| http://www.slonet.org/~tellswor |
|___________________________|
Stop for a visit, leave with a smile! To join Good Clean Fun, email: good-clean-fun-subscribe@yahoogroups.Com To leave Good Clean Fun, email: good-clean-fun-unsubscribe@yahoogroups.Com Or visit the Good Clean Fun web site at http://www. slonet.org/~tellswor/
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How to Photograph a New Puppy

1. Remove film from box and load camera.
2. Remove film box from puppy's mouth and throw in trash.
3. Remove puppy from trash and brush coffee grounds from muzzle.
4. Choose a suitable background for photo.
5. Mount camera on tripod and focus.
6. Find puppy and take dirty sock from mouth.
7. Place puppy in pre-focused spot and return to camera.
8. Forget about spot and crawl after puppy on knees.
9. Focus with one hand and fend off puppy with other hand.
10. Get tissue and clean nose print from lens.
11. Take flash cube from puppy's mouth and throw in trash.
12. Put cat outside and put peroxide on the scratch on puppy's nose.
13. Put magazines back on coffee table.
14. Try to get puppy's attention by squeaking toy over your head.
15. Replace your glasses and check camera for damage.
16. Jump up in time to grab puppy by scruff of neck and say, "No, outside! No, outside!"
17. Clean up mess.
18. Fix a drink.
19. Sit back in Lazy Boy with drink and resolve to teach puppy "sit" and "stay" the first thing in the morning.

Received from Thomas S. Ellsworth.

(-:][:-)

ARENT - Job Description

This is hysterical. If it had been presented this way, I don't believe any of us would have done it!!!!

POSITION:

Mom, Mommy, Mama, Ma
Dad, Daddy, Dada, Pa, Pop

JOB DESCRIPTION:

Long-term team players needed for challenging permanent work in an often chaotic environment.

Candidates must possess excellent communication and organizational skills and be willing to work variable hours, which will include evenings and weekends and frequent 24-hour shifts on call.

Some overnight travel required, including trips to primitive camping sites on rainy weekends and endless sports tournaments in faraway cities!

Travel expenses not reimbursed.

Extensive courier duties also required.

RESPONSIBILITIES:

The rest of your life.

Must be willing to be hated, at least temporarily, until someone needs $5.

Must be willing to bite tongue repeatedly.

Also, must possess the physical stamina of a pack mule and be able to go from zero to 60 mph in three seconds flat in case, this time, the screams from the backyard are not someone just crying wolf.

Must be willing to face stimulating technical challenges, such as small gadget repair, mysteriously sluggish toilets, and stuck zippers.

Must screen phone calls, maintain calendars, and coordinate production of multiple homework projects.

Must have ability to plan and organize social gatherings for clients of all ages and mental outlooks.

Must be willing to be indispensable one minute and an embarrassment the next.

Must handle assembly and product safety testing of a half million cheap plastic toys and battery-operated devices.

Must always hope for the best but be prepared for the worst.

Must assume final, complete accountability for the quality of the end product.

Responsibilities also include floor maintenance and janitorial work throughout the facility.

POSSIBILITY FOR ADVANCEMENT & PROMOTION:

If you are lucky, you may be promoted to the position of Grandparent. Of course, you must still retain and fulfill all the responsibilities of Parent while assuming the new title and job responsibilities of Grandparent.

PREVIOUS EXPERIENCE:

None required, unfortunately. On-the-job training offered on a continually exhausting basis.

WAGES AND COMPENSATION:

Get this! You pay them!

Offering frequent raises and bonuses.

A balloon payment is due when they turn 18 because of the assumption that college will help them become financially independent.

When you die, you give them whatever is left.

The oddest thing about this reverse-salary scheme is that you actually enjoy it and wish you could only do more.

BENEFITS:

While no health or dental insurance, no pension, no tuition reimbursement, no paid holidays, and no stock options are offered, this job supplies limitless opportunities for personal growth and free hugs and kisses for life if you play your cards right.

Received from Laurie Johnson.

(-:][:-)

Star of the Euphrates

King Ozymndias of Assyria was running low on cash after years of war with the Hittites. His last great possession was the Star of the Euphrates, the most valuable diamond in the ancient world. Desperate, he went to Crosus, the pawnbroker, to get a loan.

Crosus said, "I'll give you 100,000 dinars for it."

"But I paid a million dinars for it," the king protested. "Don't you know who I am? I am the king!"

Crosus replied, "When you wish to pawn a Star, makes no difference who you are."

Received from Cathy Gilstrap.

(-:][:-)

Stranded on a Desert Island

A ragged individual stranded for several months on a small desert island in the middle of the Pacific Ocean noticed a bottle lying in the sand with a piece of paper in it. Rushing to the bottle, he pulled out the cork and with shaking hands withdrew the message.

"Due to lack of maintenance," he read, "we regretfully have found it necessary to cancel your e-mail account."

Received from Lindsey.

(-:][:-)

Price of Oranges

Mrs. Golden was shopping at a produce stand in her neighborhood. She approached the vendor and asked, "How much are these oranges?"

"Two for a quarter," answered the vendor.

"How much is just one?" she asked.

"Fifteen cents," answered the vendor.

"Then I'll take the other one," said Mrs. Golden.

Received from pkaine.

(-:][:-)

-=+=-
Rate this funny at http://www.gcfl.net/archive.php?funny=20060113
Brought to you by GCFL.net: The Good, Clean Funnies List A cheerful heart is good medicine... (Prov 17:22a) Mail address: GCFL, Box 100, Harvest, AL 35749, USA
To print or email this funny to others, go to http://www.gcfl.net/archive.php?funny=20060113
The latest GCFL funny can always be found on the web at http://www.gcfl.net/latest.php
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My First Confession

A parish priest was being honored at a dinner on the twenty-fifth anniversary of his arrival in that parish. A leading local politician, who was a member of the congregation, was chosen to make the presentation and to give a little speech at the dinner, but he was delayed in traffic, so the priest decided to say his own few words while they waited.

"You will understand," he said, "the seal of the confessional can never be broken, however I got my first impressions of the parish from the first confession I heard here. I can only hint vaguely about this, but when I came here 25 years ago I thought I had been assigned to a terrible place. The very first chap who entered my confessional told me how he had stolen a television set, and when stopped by the police, had almost murdered the officer! Further, he told me he had embezzled money from his place of business and had an affair with his boss's wife. I was appalled! But as the days went on, I learned that my people were not all like that, and I had, indeed, come to a fine parish full of understanding and loving people."

Just as the priest finished his talk, the politician arrived full of apologies at being late. He immediately began to make the presentation and give his talk.

"I'll never forget the first day our parish priest arrived in this parish," said the politician. "In fact, I had the honor of being the first one to go to him in confession."

Thanks to Jeanette Ford
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According to a news report, a private school in Washington recently was faced with a unique problem.

A number of 12-year-old girls were beginning to use lipstick and would put it on in the bathroom. That was fine, but after they put on their lipstick they would press their lips to the mirror leaving dozens of little lip prints.

Every night the maintenance man would remove them and the next day the girls would put them back. Several memos were posted about this.
Finally the principal decided that something had to be done. She called all the girls to the bathroom and met them there with the maintenance man.

She explained that all these lip prints were causing a major problem for the custodian who had to clean the mirrors every night.

To demonstrate how difficult it had been to clean the mirrors, she asked the maintenance man to show the girls how much effort was required.

He took out a long-handled squeegee, dipped it in the toilet, and cleaned the mirror with it.
Since then, there have been no lip prints on the mirror. (There are teachers, and then there are educators.)

Thanks to Pat Hammock
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"Don't strive for recognition, but work for achievement." -- Vanessa Malone
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Madeleine Begun Kane Latest Columns - - http://www.madkane.com/dearcardholder.html - - DEAR CARDHOLDER: FRANKLY, WE EXPECTED BETTER OF YOU - - Dear Valued Credit Card Holder:

One year ago we welcomed you to the EASY COME EASY GO ("ECEG") Credit Card Family with open pockets and the kind of unbeatable terms we could offer to only a select few. As you will recall, our unparalleled benefits included the following Preferred Customer Perks:

a) A generous rebate program;
b) Triple or nothing warranty deals;
c) Frequent flyer points for your pets; and
d) Our weekly ECEG-Picks lottery (ECEG employees and their families not eligible to participate, lottery not available where prohibited by law, ECEG-Picks temporarily inactive due to pending class action suit).

You will also recall that you received our special, one time only, introductory interest rate -- the one that drove our Chief Financial Officer to drink. You also received our personal guaranty that our rates would never exceed those of any credit company under federal investigation.

So it is with deep regret and sadness that we advise you of our disappointment with you as a customer. Yes, disappointment. For despite our unmatched terms, you have not met your end of the bargain. Not only have you failed to use your card more than 3 times during the last 12 months, but on each occasion, you paid your bill in full and on time. This is inconsistent with your prior credit history and, frankly, we expected better of you.

Your prompt payments and inadequate use of your credit card force us to take the drastic action of converting your account to Non-Preferred Customer Status. As a Non-Preferred Customer, you will be assessed a ten dollar carrying charge for each month in which you fail to use your card and a five dollar surcharge on each paid-on-time monthly bill. Additionally your Preferred Customer Perks will be eliminated, except for our rebate program which will henceforth be limited to purchases made in Venezuela.

To avoid a $50 penalty, kindly turn in your Platinum Preferred Customer Card in person within one week. At that time you will be given an ugly brown card bearing the words "NON-PREFERRED" in bold letters. (Consult the enclosure to find a Card Exchange Site conveniently located no more than 120 miles from your home.)

We are pleased to report that your Non-Preferred Status will not prevent you from purchasing an unlimited number of Easy Come Easy Go tee shirts at a bargain price of 19.95 plus tax and $5 shipping.

Moreover, if you act quickly you can still qualify for Preferred Customer reinstatement. Simply use your card at least 12 times in the next 3 months, incur debt in the minimum sum of $3000, and pay no more than 10 percent of the amount owed on your card each month plus interest. Yes, that's all it takes to re-qualify for Easy Come Easy Go's Preferred Customer Perks.

Thank you for doing business with EASY COME EASY GO, and HAPPY SHOPPING!

Sincerely,

Frank N. Sinseer, Jr. President

EASY COME EASY GO Credit Services
http://www.madkane.com
http://www.madkane.com/notable.html (Notables Weblog)
http://www.madkane.com/bush.html (Dubya's Dayly Diary)
Subscribe to MadKane Humor Newsletter (weekly) here:
http://www.madkane.com/email.html
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Put your car keys beside your bed at night. If you hear a noise outside your home or someone trying to get in your house, just press the panic button for your car. The alarm will be set off and the horn will continue to sound until either you turn it off or the car battery dies. This tip came from a neighborhood watch coordinator. Next time you come home for the night and you start to put your keys away, think of this: It's a security alarm system that you probably already have and requires no installation. Test it. It will go off from most everywhere inside your house and will keep honking until your battery runs down or until you reset it with the button on the key fob chain. It works if you park in your driveway or garage. If your car alarm goes off when someone is trying to break in your house, odds are the burglar or rapist won't stick around.... after a few seconds all the neighbors will be looking out their windows to see who is out there and sure enough the criminal won't want that. And, remember to carry your keys while walking to your car in a parking lot. The alarm can work the same way there.....

Thanks to Jeanette Ford
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| Safety from the Heart |
-----------------------------------------------------
May 23, 2007
Hurricane Preparedness Week is May 20-26, 2007.

Hurricane hazards come in many forms: storm surge, high winds, tornadoes, and flooding. This means it is important for your family to have a plan that includes all of these hazards. Look carefully at the safety actions associated with each type of hurricane hazard and prepare your family disaster plan accordingly. But remember this is only a guide. The first and most important thing anyone should do when facing a hurricane threat is to use common sense.

You should be able to answer the following questions before a hurricane threatens:

What are the Hurricane Hazards?
What does it mean to you?
What actions should you take to be prepared?

If you are HURRICANE AWARE you will be able to answer these three questions:

1. What are the Hurricane Hazards?
Storm Surge, Marine Hazards, Tornadoes, High Winds, and Inland Flooding

2. What does it mean to you?
Do you live in a Surge Zone? On a Barrier Island? In an area prone to flooding? In a strong sturdy home?

3. What actions should you take to be prepared?
Family Disaster Plan, Disaster Supply Kit, Secure your home, Have a place to go, and Stay Aware

RELATED WEB SITES
• FEDERAL EMERGENCY MANAGEMENT AGENCY
• AMERICAN RED CROSS

ADDITIONAL SAFETY INFORMATION

By the Start of Hurricane Season you should:

Assemble your Disaster Supply Kit. These items are often scattered around your home and simply need to be brought together into one location. In certain circumstances you may need to go to a store to purchase an item to supplement your kit.

Write out your Family Disaster Plan. Discuss the possible hazards with your family. Determine if you are in an evacuation area. Identify an out-of-town family contact.

When a Watch is issued you should:

Check your Disaster Supply Kit. Make sure nothing is missing. Determine if there is anything you need to supplement your kit. Replenish your water.

Activate your Family Disaster Plan. Protective measures should be initiated, especially those actions that require extra time (for example, securing a boat or leaving a barrier island).

When a Warning is issued you should:

Ready your Disaster Supply Kit for use. If you need to evacuate, you should bring your Supply Kit with you.

Use your Family Disaster Plan. Your family should be in the process of completing protective actions and deciding the safest location to be during the storm.

http://www.nhc.noaa.gov/HAW2/english/intro.shtml
_________________________________
| Safety from the Heart |
--------------------------------------------------
May 17, 2007
Basics, Basics, Basics
Today's Safety From the Heart message is from Dale Mann.

It seems we often forget to follow the basics in our daily duties, things we learned when first hired, etc. After awhile we become complacent, got this thing down pat. A big resounding wrong!! If you do not do the basics right to begin with, you cannot end up right. You will have extra work. If you had followed the basics to start with, you would be through and have the satisfaction of knowing you did the job well from start to finish.

Basics is something we all always have to start with each time,you have got to do it correctly or you're likely to be in a "Come to Jesus" meeting to repent of your sins and hope to get redemption. I recall a time when I was 18 on board a US Navy warship. We were in the Phillipines and having a big, old time. Boat was leaving at 6:30am sharp, we had to be back on the boat by 4:30am that morning. Naturally at 18, I was calm, cool and collected. Went out and decided to sleep on shore in Olongopo City. I'd just wake up early in the morning. It didn't work out that way, woke up, the sun was straight overhead, ran back to the base and the ship. Ship was gone, had to turn myself in to the Shore Patrol. They called the ship, the ship said, yeah, we want the sorry rascal back, we got something for him, so they arranged for a helicopter to fly me to the boat.

My buddies were all laughing when I landed on the fantail of the boat. Got whisked away from the helicopter and went straight to Captain's Mast. The Captain was a good man who had a way about him that convinced you there was nothing finer than being on a US Navy Warship when you were supposed to be on it. There was nothing in town worth a hoot compared to it. Can I get a amen on that? Amen!! I can't hear you!!! AMEN, AMEN, AMEN!!! and a big Hallelujah to boot!!!!

This is a basic lesson I never forgot from that good man. I can't stand to run late or be late for anything, start gnashing my teeth and getting a cold, sweaty feeling. I'll camp out overnight rather than be late.

We all need to stick to the basics in all our activities, we need to remember our lessons in life, if we start right, we'll end right and everyone will have less stress, including you. You know who I'm talking to.
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Our Church, Magnolia Christian Center, has the following mission statement. Our purpose is to build a great church for the glory of God through the great commission and the great commandment. MCC' Vision - That MCC will be a place hopping with children, energized with teenagers, balanced with diversity and transformed by the power of God! We want to turn uninterested people into interested people and win the lost to make fully devoted followers of Christ. www.mcc2000.net
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Activities and Events of Interest

PurpleHull Pea Festival
& World Championship Rotary Tiller Race!
June 29-30, 2007
Emerson, Arkansas
~~~
The Emancipation Proclamation will be on display at the Clinton Library September 22-25, 2007.
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"September 11 WDYTJWD" W. P. Florence
Justice first, then peace."
"September 11" Never forget.--Tony Moses
"ONE NATION UNDER GOD ...the only way"--Phillip Story
"We have nothing to fear but fear itself." -- Franklin D. Roosevelt
"Keeping my head down but face toward Heaven" - - Jody Eldred, ABC News Cameraman in Kuwait
"Remember Pearl Harbor? Remember 9/11!" --"Bug"
Tell the people you love that you love them, at every opportunity. - - George Carlin
"Stop telling God how big your storm is. Instead, tell the storm how big your God is!" - - Queen E. Watson
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Weekly Toll - - http://weeklytoll.blogspot.com/
Death In The Workplace w/News & Updates
John Donne - ...any man's death diminishes me, because I am involved in mankind, and therefore never send to know for whom the bell tolls; it tolls for thee.
A partial list of workplace fatalities.

Construction worker dies after fall from garage roof
WI - Deputy can't say if Gene Bitter died from the fall or from a medical condition. A 50-year-old Town of Rhine man died Thursday morning after he fell off the roof of a garage he was working on in the Town of Sheboygan,

Construction worker dies fixing Dan Ryan
IL - Few construction workers still in the business can say they worked on the first version of the Dan Ryan Expressway.Joseph Ulanowski was one of them. Ulanowski, 67, died Thursday after suffering a heart attack while working on the reconstruction of the Ryan through Chicago’s South Side.

Construction worker crushed to death on job site
NV - A local construction worker (Kirk Richardson, 20) died Thursday afternoon after being crushed to death by a steel beam. The accident happened near Sahara and Durango at the site of a new medical center. Officials at the job site say the beam slipped and fell to the ground. It then bounced and hit the worker across the head, killing him instantly.

2 Chicago Businessmen Killed in Plane Crash
IL - A small jet crashed into a farm field near the airport here while trying to land in rough weather, killing the two Chicago-area businessmen on board, Beaverhead County officials said. The Cessna 550 twin-engine jet was traveling to Dillon from Rockford, Ill., when it crashed Thursday morning,

Trailer from McDonald's truck crashes onto Thruway, driver killed
HILLBURN, N.Y. -- The driver of a McDonald's truck passed out driving Tuesday, causing the trailer section of the vehicle to fall from an overpass onto the New York State Thruway and burst into flames, authorities said.

Kroger employee fatally shot outside Indianapolis store
INDIANAPOLIS, IN — A Kroger supermarket employee was fatally shot today outside the store where he worked in the produce department for 30 years, police said. Wendall A. Anderson, 58, was wounded in the chest in the store parking lot on the southwest side of the city just after 5 a.m. and died a short time later at a hospital, police said. A store security camera showed Anderson speaking to a man who emerged from a white car after Anderson arrived at work,

Tour bus driver dies in accident
TUSCUMBIA, AL -- A tour bus driver who had carried hundreds of Shoals residents all over the country died late Friday when the bus he was driving smashed into the rear of an 18-wheeler.

2nd Worker Dies In Line Rupture At Iatan Plant
KANSAS CITY, Mo. -- A second worker has died from injuries he suffered in a line rupture at the Iatan Power Plant, a KCP&L spokesman said on Friday. The man's name has not been released. The plant, which is northwest of Weston, had been shut down on Monday because of flooding concerns. Officials said the plant had been powered up and a line that carries hot steam ruptured shortly before noon on Wednesday.

Tanker flips; driver killed
NJ - SEQUENCE: Car loses control, crosses median, hits tanker, which catches fire
CONSEQUENCES: Rush-hour traffic on I-195 in Howell, surrounding roads a mess
HOWELL — The driver of a tanker truck carrying 9,000 gallons of gasoline was killed in a fiery crash on westbound Interstate 195 Thursday evening after an eastbound car lost control, sideswiped a dump truck, crossed the median into the oncoming lanes and hit the tanker.

http://weeklytoll.blogspot.com/2007/04/weekly-toll-death-in-american-workplace.html
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NEVER FORGET! We're listing the names of our soldiers killed weekly. These records can be found at http://www.defenselink. mil/releases/

The Department of Defense announced the death of two soldiers who were supporting Operation Iraqi Freedom. They died May 18 in Baghdad, Iraq, of wounds suffered when their unit came in contact with enemy forces using an improvised explosive device and small arms fire. They were assigned to the 1st Battalion, 325th Airborne Infantry Regiment, 2nd Brigade Combat Team, 82nd Airborne Division, Fort Bragg, N.C. Killed were:
01. Sgt. 1st Class Scott J. Brown, 33, of Windsor, Colo.
02. Spc. Marquis J. McCants, 23, of San Antonio.

The Department of Defense announced the death of three soldiers who were supporting Operation Iraqi Freedom. They died May 18 in Tahrir, Iraq, of wounds suffered when their unit came in contact with enemy forces using an improvised explosive device. They were assigned to the 1st Battalion, 12th Cavalry Regiment, 3rd Brigade Combat Team, 1st Cavalry Division, Fort Hood, Texas. Killed were:
03. Sgt. Anselmo Martinez III, 26, of Robstown, Texas.
04. Spc. Casey W. Nash, 22, of Baltimore.
05. Spc. Joshua G. Romero, 19, of Crowley, Texas.


The Department of Defense announced the death of three soldiers who were supporting Operation Iraqi Freedom. They died May 18 in Tahrir, Iraq, of wounds suffered when their unit came in contact with enemy forces using an improvised explosive device. They were assigned to the 1st Battalion, 12th Cavalry Regiment, 3rd Brigade Combat Team, 1st Cavalry Division, Fort Hood, Texas. Killed were:
06. Sgt. Anselmo Martinez III, 26, of Robstown, Texas.
07. Spc. Casey W. Nash, 22, of Baltimore.
08. Spc. Joshua G. Romero, 19, of Crowley, Texas.

09. Sgt. Justin D. Wisniewski, 22, of Standish, Mich., died May 19 in Lutfiyah, Iraq, of wounds suffered when an improvised explosive device detonated near his unit. He was assigned to the 2nd Battalion, 15th Field Artillery Regiment, 2nd Brigade Combat Team, 10th Mountain Division, Fort Drum, N.Y.

10. Sgt. Ryan J. Baum, 27, of Aurora, Colo., died May 18, in Karmah, Iraq, of wounds suffered when his unit came in contact with enemy forces using small arms fire. Baum was assigned to the 3rd Battalion, 509th Infantry Regiment, 4th Brigade Combat Team, 25th Infantry Division, Fort Richardson, Alaska.

The Department of Defense announced the death of three soldiers who were supporting Operation Iraqi Freedom. They died May 17 in Iskandariya, Iraq, of wounds suffered when an improvised explosive device detonated near their vehicle. They were assigned to the 725th Brigade Support Battalion, 4th Brigade Combat Team, 25th Infantry Division, Fort Richardson, Alaska. Killed were:
11. Sgt. 1st Class Jesse B. Albrecht, 31, of Hager City, Wis.
12. Spc. Coty J. Phelps, 20, of Kingman, Ariz.
13. Pfc. Victor M. Fontanilla, 23, of Stockton, Calif.

The Department of Defense announced the death of six soldiers who were supporting Operation Iraqi Freedom. They died May 19 in Baghdad, Iraq, of wounds suffered when an improvised explosive device detonated near their vehicle. They were assigned to the 1st Battalion, 5th Cavalry Regiment, 2nd Brigade Combat Team, 1st Cavalry Division, Fort Hood, Texas. Killed were:
14. Staff Sgt. Christopher Moore, 28, of Alpaugh, Calif.
15. Sgt. Jean P. Medlin, 27, of Pelham, Ala.
16. Spc. David W. Behrle, 20, of Tipton, Iowa.
17. Spc. Joseph A. Gilmore, 26, of Webster, Fla.
18. Pfc. Travis F. Haslip, 20, of Ooltewah, Tenn.
19. Pfc. Alexander R. Varela, 19, of Fernley, Nev.

20. Sgt. Jason A. Schumann, 23, of Hawley, Minn., died May 19 in Ad Diwaniyah, Iraq, of wounds suffered when an improvised explosive device detonated near his vehicle. Schumann was assigned to the 3rd Squadron, 89th Cavalry Regiment, 4th Brigade Combat Team, 10th Mountain Division, Fort Polk, La.

21. Cpl. Ryan D. Collins, 20, of Vernon, Texas, died May 19, in Hamiyah, Iraq, of wounds suffered when his unit came in contact with enemy forces using small arms fire May 18. The circumstances surrounding his death are under investigation.


The Department of Defense announced the death of two Marines who were supporting Operation Iraqi Freedom.
22. Lance Cpl. Benjamin D. Desilets, 21, of Elmwood, Ill.
23. Cpl. Julian M. Woodall, 21, of Tallahassee, Fla.
Both Marines died May 22 while conducting combat operations in Al Anbar province, Iraq. They were assigned to 3rd Battalion, 10th Marine Regiment, 2nd Marine Division, II Marine Expeditionary Force, Camp Lejeune, N.C.

24. Pvt. Oscar Sauceda Jr., 21, of Del Rio, Texas, died May 22, in Baghdad, Iraq, of wounds suffered when his unit came in contact with enemy forces using small arms fire. He was assigned to the 1st Battalion, 28th Infantry Regiment, 4th Infantry Brigade Combat Team, 1st Infantry Division, Fort Riley, Kansas.

25. Sgt. Robert J. Montgomery Jr., 29, of Scottsburg, Ind., died May 22, in Al Jabour, Iraq, of wounds suffered when an improvised explosive device detonated near his unit. He was assigned to the 1st Squadron, 40th Cavalry Regiment, 4th Brigade Combat Team (Airborne), 25th Infantry Division, Fort Richardson, Alaska.

The Department of Defense announced the death of three soldiers who were supporting Operation Iraqi Freedom. They died May 21 in Baghdad, Iraq, of wounds suffered when multiple improvised explosive devices detonated near their vehicle. They were assigned to the 425th Brigade Special Troops Battalion, 4th Brigade Combat Team (Airborne), 25th Infantry Division, Fort Richardson, Alaska. Killed were:
26. Staff Sgt. Shannon V. Weaver, 28, Urich, Mo.
27. Sgt. Brian D. Ardron, 32, of Acworth, Ga.
28. Spc. Michael W. Davis, 22, of San Marcos, Texas.

29. Staff Sgt. David C. Kuehl, 27, of Wahpeton, N.D., died May 22 in Taji, Iraq, of wounds suffered when an improvised explosive device detonated near his unit. He was assigned to the 4th Battalion, 9th Infantry Regiment, 4th Brigade, 2nd Infantry Division (Stryker Brigade Combat Team), Fort Lewis, Wash.

The Department of Defense announced today the death of two soldiers who were supporting Operation Iraqi Freedom. They died May 22 in Taji, Iraq, of wounds suffered when an improvised explosive device detonated near their unit. They were assigned to the 4th Battalion, 9th Infantry Regiment, 4th Brigade, 2nd Infantry Division (Stryker Brigade Combat Team), Fort Lewis, Wash.
Killed were:
30. Staff Sgt. Kristopher A. Higdon, 25, of Odessa, Texas.
31. Pfc. Robert A. Worthington, 19, of Jackson, Ga.

32. Pfc. Joseph J. Anzack Jr., 20, of Torrance, Calif., was captured May 12 by enemy forces in Al Taqa, Iraq, when his unit was attacked by insurgents using automatic fire and explosives. His body was recently recovered in Iraq. The circumstances surrounding his capture and death remain under investigation.

33. Spc. Benjamin J. Ashley, 22, of Independence, Mo., died May 24 in Balad, Iraq, of wounds suffered when an improvised explosive device detonated near his vehicle. Ashley was assigned to the 1st Battalion, 5th Field Artillery Regiment, 1st Brigade, 1st Infantry Division, Fort Riley, Kan.

34. Pfc. Robert H. Dembowski, 20, of Ivyland, Pa., died May 24 in Baghdad, Iraq, of wounds suffered when his unit came in contact with enemy forces using small arms fire. He was assigned to the 1st Battalion, 504th Parachute Infantry Regiment, 1st Brigade Combat Team, 82nd Airborne Division, Fort Bragg, N.C.

35. Sgt. Iosiwo Uruo, 27, of Agana Heights, Guam, died May 24, in Buhriz, Iraq, of wounds suffered when his unit came in contact with enemy forces using small arms fire. He was assigned to the 1st Squadron, 14th Cavalry Regiment, 3rd Brigade, 2nd Infantry Division (Stryker Brigade Combat Team), Fort Lewis, Wash.

The Department of Defense announced the death of two soldiers who were supporting Operation Iraqi Freedom. They died May 23 of wounds suffered when an improvised explosive device detonated near their unit in Ramadi, Iraq. They were assigned to the 3rd Battalion, 69th Armor Regiment, 1st Brigade Combat Team, 3rd Infantry Division, Fort Stewart, Ga. Killed were:
36. Staff Sgt. Steve Butcher Jr., 27, of Penfield, N.Y. He died in Ramadi, Iraq.
37. Pfc. Daniel P. Cagle, 22, of Carson, Calif. He died in Balad, Iraq.

38. Pfc. Casey P. Zylman, 22, of Coleman, Mich., died May 25 in Mosul, Iraq, of wounds suffered when an improvised explosive device detonated near his vehicle May 24 in Tallafar, Iraq. He was assigned to the 3rd Squadron, 4th Cavalry Regiment, 3rd Brigade Combat Team, 25th Infantry Division, Schofield Barracks, Hawaii.
~~

DoD Assists in Identification of Missing Vietnam-Era CIA Pilot

The Department of Defense POW/Missing Personnel Office (DPMO) announced today that the remains of an American civilian pilot, missing in action from Vietnam while flying for Civil Air Transport, a proprietary of the CIA, have been identified and returned to his family for burial with full military honors.

He is James B. McGovern Jr. of Elizabeth, N.J. He will be buried tomorrow at Arlington National Cemetery near Washington, D.C.

On May 6, 1954, McGovern, along with his co-pilot, First Officer Wallace A. Buford, and four French servicemen, departed Haiphong, Vietnam, in their Civil Air Transport C-119 on what was to be the last supply drop to the besieged French forces at Camp Isabelle—the remaining French holdout in the battle of Dien Bien Phu. As the aircraft approached the drop zone, it was hit by anti-aircraft fire. The pilots attempted to fly southwest to the relative safety of Laos, but crashed along the Song [River] Ma in Houaphan Province. Only two of the Frenchmen survived and were taken prisoner by Lao forces. One of them died within a few days, and the other was released and returned to France a few months later. McGovern, Wallace and two of the French servicemen were not recovered.

Between 1997 and 1998, joint U.S.-Lao People’s Democratic Republic (L.P.D.R.) teams, led by the Joint POW/MIA Accounting Command (JPAC), traveled to Houaphan Province two times to investigate the incident. They interviewed several Laotian citizens who recalled the crash. The citizens said that three of the crewmen who died in the impact had been buried near the crash site. When the team surveyed the site, they found small fragments of aircraft wreckage, but did not locate any grave sites.

In 2002, another joint U.S.-L.P.D.R. team excavated the site. They found crew-related equipment and aircraft wreckage, including an aircraft data plate dated 8-21-52, but found no human remains. A few months later, another team revisited the site and recovered human remains from an isolated burial.

Among other forensic identification tools and circumstantial evidence, scientists from JPAC and the Armed Forces DNA Identification Laboratory also used dental comparisons and mitochondrial DNA in the identification of McGovern’s remains.

For additional information on the Defense Department’s mission to account for missing Americans, visit the DPMO Web site at http://www.dtic.mil/dpmo/ or call (703) 699-1169.

http://icasualties.org/oif/default.aspx
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Please remember to pray for the American soldiers stationed everywhere around the globe and especially in Iraq. Times have been and are very tough and it would be nice if you would all just say a prayer for their safety and for their families.
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Scheduled Activities
~~~
Columbia County Amateur Radio Club meets Every second Thursday @ 7:00 p.m. Union Street Station. And YOU'RE invited. Net is every Sunday at 20:30 on 147.105.
~~~
MCC - "Faith Builders" Small group meets the second and fourth Tuesdays, 6:30 pm to 7:45 pm.
~~~
MCC - Mom's Day Out - Every Tuesday and Thursday from 9 to 2.$10 for the first child, $5 for the second. Call 234-3225 for reservations.
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MCC - Nursing Home Ministry - Meadowbrook Every Tuesday from 10 to 11 am. Taylor, the last Thursday each month.
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Men's Prayer Breakfast held every Tuesday morning at 6 AM in Miller's Cafeteria. If you aren't a regular participant at the Men's Prayer Breakfast, you're missing some great food, fellowship and inspired teaching of the Word. Hope to see you there.
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Emergency Phone Number 911
(Fire, Police, Ambulance, Sheriff, etc. )
Central Dispatch 234-5655
(Non - Emergency Number)
Direct Numbers
Ambulance - 234-7371 (24 Hour)
Jail - 234-5331 (24 Hour)
Poison Control - 800-222-1222 (24 Hour)
http://www. aapcc. org/
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"There is not enough darkness in the world to put out the light of one candle."
"Laugh whenever you can and cry if you need to." -- "Bug"
"I read the end of the book. We win!" -- "Bug"
"We may not be able to cure the world, but we don't have to make it sicker." -- "Bug"
"There just ain't enough fingers for all the holes in the dike." - - "Bug"
"It's no big deal doing what God tells you to do. A big deal would be NOT doing what God tells you to do. Just ask Jonah." - - Paul Troquille
"A simple way to take measure of a country is to look at how many want in ... and how many want out." - - Tony Blair
"Information is the currency of democracy." - Jefferson
~~~~~
Hope you enjoy the newsletter.
Again, thanks to all our contributors this week.

God bless and GOD BLESS AMERICA!!!
Psa 101:3-4 Luke 11:37-41 Luke 11:27-28 Psa 119:94-98 Gen 1:29-31 http://www.e-min.org/
God is Good and Faithful CU 73 IC JFM CSP NREMT-I KC5HII

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