Bug's Bleat - - GCF: Getting Younger - - Photos

  John Cochran, Scotty McWilliams and Todd Ferguson at Rescue Team Training
  Shawn Wingfield trains for Confined Space Rescue
  Annette and Felicia
  Jim and Velma at our latest Steak and Bingo Supper

Bug's Bleat - - GCF: Getting Younger

Volume 9, Issue 16 Friday, April 20, 2007

Hello All,

Our new“TriCaster” is attracting young video “freaks” by the gross. Everyone enjoys “playing” with the equipment.
[http://shop.newtek.com/index.asp?PageAction=VIEWPROD&ProdID=24] [http://catalog2.panasonic.com/webapp/wcs/stores/servlet/ModelDetail?displayTab=O&storeId=11201&catalogId=13051&itemId=98187&catGroupId=14571&surfModel=AG-DVC20]
~~~~~
Worst mass shooting incident in US history this week. Already, they’re calling for stricter gun control laws. Humm . . . . If any of the students (or faculty) in that building had been “packing” would the death toll have been lower? Could they have been able to fight off the attacker?
We don’t know, but over the last 70 years, the right to own guns have been steadily restricted and during the same time, the instances of lone (or pairs) of gunmen killing unarmed innocent victims has increased. Hummm . . . . ???
~~~~~
From Pattie in Africa

Hello everybody!

I'm sorry you are just now receiving this. Internet is Africa requires patience.

I flew out on Tuesday, the 17th. I didn't sleep one wink the night before and it was very emotional saying goodbye to my family. My two sisters and my mom drove me to the airport.
I had to say goodbye to my dog that morning. Even that was rough. After I checked in, I stayed out of security with my family until the latest I could. It was painful. The airport allowed me to choose one person to go through security with me, since I wouldn't see them for a long time. My mom went with me. I will treasure those few moments forever. She told me about how I wasn't supposed to be born. Because of that, she knew God had a special plan for me. She told me how proud she was that I was stepping out and doing this. We hugged and hugged and cried and cried. I thank God for these three ladies. The day before I left, they were complete servants to whatever I needed, and I know I drove them crazy. They did more for me than I deserve, but they know I would do the same for them.

I flew to Memphis and had a layover then to Detroit for a layover then to Amsterdam.......hallelujah for showers in Amsterdam........then on to Africa. God was loving me on this flight. Everyone in my section had a couple of rows each to sleep on. I was able to catch up a bit.

I had no problems in customs, no problems at all. It was so smooth, and I am so thankful. A couple from the ministry I will work with picked me up. I slept at the ministry compound that first night. I must say I almost cried myself to sleep.........but God. He is so wonderful. I know that the sacrifice I am making may be great, but if I don't obey God.......I would be miserable. No money, no fame, no material possessions can replace peace with God. Not even family and friends.

The second day, I got to visit with some of the ministry team. They are glad I'm here and look forward to working with me. We took my crates to my house and then another missionary that is friends with Missionary Pam Prince took me on a tour. She helped me with money exchange, get a cell phone, order internet, and buy groceries. She was very gracious. She and her husband are church planting trainers from the US. We ate lunch at an Indian restaurant and then I headed back to the compound. I reached my house that night at about eight o'clock. I wasn't comfortable driving yet so I was dropped off........me, the guards, two crazy dogs, and a bit of nervousness. I sprayed my bedroom with Doom mosquito spray, tucked my mosquito net in, and tried to sleep. Jet lag and all my thoughts kept me awake, but I survived my first night.

The last couple of days I have been busy unpacking and getting the house ready. I finally started driving.........I practiced on the road toward Kenya. Good thing I didn't go far! I hadn't driven a standard in twenty years, but add the fact that you are shifting with the left hand and driving on the wrong side of the road and car. I am getting better at it. Today I got lost for a while, but I found my way around finally. People, bicycles, and cars just run out in front of you. I just keep saying, "please don't let me hit a child!"

I look forward to beginning ministry. Right now we are on a break, so it is great time for me to get through homesickness and everything else before I get busy. I picked up my curriculum books for the classes I will teach in June and July.

Thank you, family and friends, for all of your support. I couldn't do what God has asked me to do without your love and support. Please keep praying for me. I need God's grace like never before.

You all mean so much to me.

Pattie
~~~~~
"Stop telling God how big your storm is. Instead, tell the storm how big your God is!"
~~~~~
Hi, it's Tim from Pandora,

I'm writing today to ask for your help. The survival of Pandora and all of Internet radio is in jeopardy because of a recent decision by the Copyright Royalty Board in Washington, DC to almost triple the licensing fees for Internet radio sites like Pandora. The new royalty rates are irrationally high, more than four times what satellite radio pays and broadcast radio doesn't pay these at all. Left unchanged, these new royalties will kill every Internet radio site, including Pandora.

In response to these new and unfair fees, we have formed the SaveNetRadio Coalition, a group that includes listeners, artists, labels and webcasters. I hope that you will consider joining us.

Please sign our petition urging your Congressional representative to act to save Internet radio: http://capwiz.com/saveinternetradio/issues/alert/?alertid=9631541

Please feel free to forward this link/email to your friends - the more petitioners we can get the better.
Understand that we are fully supportive of paying royalties to the artists whose music we play, and have done so since our inception. As a former touring musician myself, I'm no stranger to the challenges facing working musicians. The issue we have with the recent ruling is that it puts the cost of streaming far out of the range of ANY webcaster's business potential.

I hope you'll take just a few minutes to sign our petition - it WILL make a difference. As a young industry, we do not have the lobbying power of the RIAA. You, our listeners, are by far our biggest and most influential allies.

As always, and now more than ever, thank you for your support.

-Tim Westergren
(Pandora founder)
~~~~~
If you’d like to write Dr. Antoon, he’d like to hear from you. This is his current address, the latest of the three federal prisons’ he’s been in.
Patrick Antoon #06669-010
Federal Prison Camp-La Tuna
P. O. Box 8000
Anthony, NM/TX 88021
~~~~~
The photos on the front of this week’s “Bleat” include more shots of Arkansas’s Disaster Medical Assistance Team, AR-1, setting up a “MASH” tent.
~~~~~
Recipe(s) of the week - We’re sharing healthy recipes from the Food Network

Peach French Toast Bake Copyright, 2005, Ellie Krieger, All rights reserved
Show: Healthy Appetite with Ellie Krieger Episode: It's the Weekend


Cooking spray
1 large whole-wheat baguette (about 8 ounces)
4 whole eggs
4 egg whites
1 cup low fat milk
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
5 cups sliced peaches, fresh or frozen
½ lemon, juiced about 1 ½ tablespoons
3 tablespoons brown sugar
1/4 teaspoon ground cinnamon


Spray a 9 by 13-inch baking pan with cooking spray. Slice the baguette into ½-inch slices and arrange the slices in a single layer in the baking pan. Whisk together the eggs, egg whites, milk and vanilla. Pour the egg mixture over the bread in the pan. In a medium bowl, toss peaches with the lemon juice and 1 tablespoon of the brown sugar. Scatter the peach slices evenly on top of the bread. Combine the remaining brown sugar and cinnamon and sprinkle over the top. Cover and refrigerate overnight.
Preheat the oven to 350 degrees F. Uncover and bake for 40 minutes.

Serving suggestion: Top with a dollop of vanilla yogurt, a drizzle of maple syrup and a side of Canadian bacon.


Nutrition Information
Nutritional Analysis per Serving Calories 263
Total fat 5 grams Saturated fat 1.3 grams
Protein 12 grams Carbohydrates 42 grams
Fiber 3 grams

~~~
Herb Roasted Pork Loin with Parsley Shallot Sauce Copyright, 2005, Ellie Krieger, All rights reserved
Show: Healthy Appetite with Ellie Krieger Episode: It's the Weekend


2 garlic cloves, minced (1 tablespoon)
½ teaspoon salt
2 teaspoons olive oil
1 tablespoon finely chopped fresh sage leaves or 1 teaspoon dried sage
1 tablespoon finely chopped fresh rosemary leaves or 1 teaspoon dried rosemary, crumbled
1 tablespoon finely chopped fresh thyme leaves or 1 teaspoon dried thyme
½ teaspoon freshly ground black pepper
1 (2 ½-pound) center cut boneless pork loin, trimmed of all visible fat
½ cup Parsley Shallot Sauce, recipe follows

Preheat the oven to 350 degrees F.
Mash the garlic and salt together with a fork until it forms a coarse paste. Transfer to a small bowl and stir in the oil, fresh herbs and freshly ground pepper. Rub the garlic-herb paste all over the pork. Transfer the pork to a roasting pan and roast for 1 1/4 hours or until the internal temperature reaches 155 degrees F on an instant-read thermometer. Transfer the roast to a carving board and let rest for 15 minutes. Carve the pork into slices and serve with the sauce.


Parsley Shallot Sauce:
1 1/2 cups lightly packed flat-leaf parsley leaves
2 tablespoons coarsely chopped shallot
3 tablespoons Dijon mustard
2 tablespoons extra-virgin olive oil
2 tablespoons water
2 teaspoons fresh lemon juice
1/4 teaspoon salt
Freshly ground black pepper
Combine all ingredients in a blender and puree.

Yield: ½ cup


Nutrition Information
Nutritional Analysis per Serving Calories 263
Total fat 16 grams Saturated fat 4.7 grams
Protein 28 grams Carbohydrates 3 grams
Fiber 1 gram

~~~
Honey Roasted Sweet Potatoes Copyright, 2005, Ellie Krieger, All rights reserved
Show: Healthy Appetite with Ellie Krieger Episode: It's the Weekend


2 pounds red-skinned sweet potatoes
2 tablespoons olive oil
2 tablespoons honey
1 teaspoon fresh lemon juice
½ teaspoon salt


Preheat oven to 350 degrees F.
Peel and cut the sweet potatoes into 1-inch pieces and put in a 9 by 13 baking dish. In a small bowl whisk together olive oil, honey and lemon juice. Pour mixture over potatoes and toss to coat. Sprinkle with the salt, and bake, stirring occasionally, for about 1 hour, until potatoes are tender.


Nutrition Information
Nutritional Analysis per Serving Calories 167
Total fat 4.5 grams Saturated fat 0.5 grams
Protein 2 grams Carbohydrates 30 grams
Fiber 4 grams


http://www.foodnetwork.com/food/recipes/recipe/0,1977,FOOD_9936_34170,00.html
~~~~~
The 38th Annual GMA Music Awards, also known as the Dove Awards, April 25, 2007 at the Grand Ole Opry House, Nashville, TN.
Ryan Riggins band, "Pocket Full Of Rocks" [http://www.myspace.com/pocketfullofrocks] has been nominated for 2 Doves;
New Artist of the year
Worship Album of the year
~~~~~
Here are links to items posted on The Pump Handle over the past week:

1) "Latest Weekly Toll" by Liz Borkowski Tammy has posted writeups of 59 workplace deaths that occurred recently in the U.S.
http://thepumphandle.wordpress.com/2007/04/09/latest-weekly-toll/

2) "Public Health Hardball: More Lessons from California" by David Michaels In California, industry groups may push for a limited regulation on occupational exposure to flavoring chemicals as an alternative to a complete legislative ban on diacetyl.
http://thepumphandle.wordpress.com/2007/04/10/public-health-hardball-more-lessons-from-california/

3) "Chemical Plant Safety: The States Fight Back and Homeland Security Department Retreats" by David Michaels Some states objected to the possibility of federal chemical plant regulations supplanting their stronger safety standards, and Congress and DHS reacted. http://thepumphandle.wordpress.com/2007/04/11/chemical-plant-safety-the-states-fight-back-and-dhs-retreats/

4) "Occupational Health News Roundup" by Liz Borkowski A reporter investigates fatal accidents in the Mountain West's oil and gas industry.
http://thepumphandle.wordpress.com/2007/04/11/occupational-health-news-roundup-10/

5) "Public Transit, Public Health" by James Celenza In Rhode Island, improvements to public transit can improve air quality and job prospects – that's why a coalition of public health and environmental groups is pushing for change.
http://thepumphandle.wordpress.com/2007/04/12/public-transit-public-health/

6) "Friday Blog Roundup" by Liz Borkowski Bloggers urge action on behalf of wrongly imprisoned healthcare workers in Libya, scrutinize the different versions of the IPCC report, and cover medical issues ranging from HIV to surgeon errors.
http://thepumphandle.wordpress.com/2007/04/13/friday-blog-roundup-19/

7) "Preemption by Preamble – The Bush Administration's Backdoor Efforts to Kill Law Suits and Protect Manufacturers of Dangerous Products" by David Michaels The Bush Administration has been quietly pushing a policy that would bar law suits from injured people if the manufacturer followed the letter of the federal agency's regulation – and an expected ruling from a Texas judge regarding Vioxx may demonstrate how far-reaching and damaging this will be.
http://thepumphandle.wordpress.com/2007/04/13/preemption-by-preamble-%e2%80%93-the-bush-administrations-backdoor-efforts-to-kill-law-suits-and-protect-manufacturers-of-dangerous-products/

8) "$336,000 Penalty for Coal Miners' Deaths" by Celeste Monforton MSHA assessed a $3336,000 penalty for violations related to the deaths of five miners in the Kentucky Darby Mine explosion.
http://thepumphandle.wordpress.com/2007/04/13/336000-penalty-for-coal-miners-deaths/

9) "FDA legislative action, now with commentary from the New England Journal of Medicine" by Susan Wood Three articles just published in the New England Journal of Medicine show how important upcoming FDA legislation is.
http://thepumphandle.wordpress.com/2007/04/13/fda-legislative-action-now-with-commentary-from-the-new-england-journal-of-medicine/

"OSHA Blasts Explosives Rule" by David Michaels OSHA has just issued a proposed rule that will reduce the regulatory requirements for protecting workers involved with explosives.
http://thepumphandle.wordpress.com/2007/04/15/osha-blasts-explosives-rule/

It Takes a Tragedy" by David Michaels Legislation backed by the NRA suffered an unexpected defeat in Georgia's legislature. This isn't surprising, given that in the wake of tragedies like the Virginia Tech shooting, our nation usually demands more and stronger regulation, not less.
http://thepumphandle.wordpress.com/2007/04/20/it-takes-a-tragedy/
~~~~~
MapQuest Gas Prices, Pretty Cool http://gasprices.mapquest.com
~~~~~
Don’t forget to check out www.mcc2000.net
~~~~~
We’ve now got several addresses on the web for "Da Bleat." For the latest issue, go to http://www.bugsbleat.blogspot.com
Our photos are posted at http://www.bugsbleatphotos.blogspot.com.
~~~~~
Feel free to share the "Bleat" with any and all. That's why we publish it.
~~~~~
www.aaa.com Regular
Current Avg. $ 2.69
http://www.fuelgaugereport.com/
Albemarle Employee’s pump $2.55
~~~~~
BreakPoint
With Chuck Colson

A Baby's Cry
4/20/2007
Upholding the Partial-Birth Abortion Ban Act

Eleven years ago, when U.S. senators were in the midst of a fierce debate over partial-birth abortion, the proceedings were abruptly interrupted by a baby’s cry.

I was there that day and will never forget that electrifying moment, a reminder of what we were fighting for: nothing less than the lives of innocent babies.

I thought of that baby’s cry this week when the Supreme Court upheld the Partial-Birth Abortion Ban Act. It took thirty-four years to get from Roe v. Wade to the first significant restriction of so-called “abortion rights.” It’s a reminder that when it comes to eradicating social ills, we must never give up.

That lesson was taught to us more than two hundred years ago by the British Parliamentarian William Wilberforce, a man who fought another great social evil: slavery. Wilberforce knew what a fight it would be because the British Empire depended heavily on the slave trade. So he learned all about slavery and the conditions on the slave ships. And he and his allies organized government inquiries into the horrors of the slave trade, exposing them to a horrified public.

The first victory was a small one, but it proved that the slave industry was vulnerable. A vote in 1788 restricted the number of slaves that a ship could be allowed to carry based on the ship’s tonnage.

For the next nineteen years, Wilberforce introduced bills banning the slave trade. Year after year, his opponents found ways to defeat them, often playing dirty. But after nearly two decades of hard work, in 1807, the House of Commons voted by an overwhelming majority to abolish the slave trade. It took another quarter century to abolish slavery outright.

Despite repeated losses, you see, Wilberforce kept working. By God’s grace, he made incremental gains. He didn’t demand all or nothing, but eventually he carried the day.

Like Wilberforce, pro-lifers are learning to seek small, incremental victories: parental notice; informed consent; the Born-Alive Infants Protection Act; and now, of course, the biggest yet: banning the barbaric form of abortion, crushing the skull of a baby inches from birth, which rightly sickened most Americans.

Christian conservatives have often over recent years despaired when they have lost a vote in Congress or an election. And many have said lately, “Why are we bothering with politics? We’re not getting anything from these politicians we elect.” Wrong.

Jim Dobson and I talked about this issue with President Bush when he was first elected. He stood strong, and we ought to all be grateful to him. Not only did he push this law, he also appointed nothing but strict constructionist judges, including Chief Justice Roberts and Justice Alito, who cast the deciding vote this week.

Jim and I and others have worked hard to get those judges confirmed, and pro-life senators led the fight. I hope this decision by the Court will silence those who say we have gotten nothing for our efforts and cause us all to renew our commitment to continue the fight until, just like slavery, this abominable evil is ended in this country.

Never despair. It’s a sin, because it denies the sovereignty of God.

A Right to Know: An Intellectually Honest Look at the Abortion Debate by Stand to Reason.

For Further Reading and Information

Read the text of the Supreme Court’s partial-birth abortion decision.

Anne Morse, “The Precise Details,” The Point, 18 April 2007.

Anne Morse, “A ‘Values Grenada’,” The Point, 18 April 2007.

Travis McSherley, “Decision Births Impartial Reactions,” The Point, 20 April 2007.

Andrew Cohen, “Abortion Ruling Is All about Alito,” Bench Conference blog, Washington Post, 18 April 2007.

Tom Curry, “Supreme Court Ruling Raises ’08 Stakes,” MSNBC, 19 April 2007.

Anne Morse, “Playing Dumb: How Judges and Abortionists Get around the Law,” National Review Online, 17 April 2003.

Robert Barnes, “High Court Upholds Curb on Abortion,” Washington Post, 19 April 2007, A01.

BreakPoint Commentary No. 040511, “The Truth Comes Out: The Partial-Birth Abortion Trials.”

BreakPoint Commentary No. 040602, “There They Go Again: Partial-Birth Abortions and the Courts.”

BreakPoint Commentary No. 031106, “Never Give Up: Banning (Finally) Partial-Birth Abortion.”

BreakPoint Commentary No. 050609, “Culture of Death: Baby Rowan’s Story.”

BreakPoint Commentary No. 021113, “Staying Power: Wilberforce, Slavery—and Abortion.”

Learn more about the Unborn Child Pain Awareness Act.

Learn about how you can support your local crisis pregnancy center through Care Net.

Peter Kreeft, Three Approaches to Abortion (Ignatius Press, 2002).

The BreakPoint Web site and BreakPoint WorldView Magazine feature Colson’s commentaries as well as feature articles by other established and up-and-coming writers to equip readers with a biblical perspective on a variety of issues and topics.
© 2004-2006 Prison Fellowship
~~~~~
Words of the Week:

accede: to agree or assent; also, to become a party.
refractory: stubbornly disobedient.
cavort: to bound or prance about.
efficacious: producing, or capable of producing, a desired effect.
bedaub: to besmear; also, to overdecorate.
trice: an instant; a moment.
impugn: to call in question; to make insinuations against.
from Dictionary.Com

~~~~~
"Don't bend; don't water it down; don't try to make it logical; don't edit your own soul according to the fashion. Rather, follow your most intense obsessions mercilessly." - Franz Kafka

"They deem me mad because I will not sell my days for gold; and I deem them mad because they think my days have a price." - Kahlil Gibran

"Common sense and a sense of humor are the same thing, moving at different speeds. A sense of humor is just common sense, dancing." - William James

"There is a land of the living and a land of the dead and the bridge is love, the only survival, the only meaning." - Thornton Niven Wilder

"Civilizations in decline are consistently characterized by a tendency towards standardization and uniformity." - Arnold Toynbee

"Not ignorance, but ignorance of ignorance, is the death of knowledge." - Alfred North Whitehead

"Good people do not need laws to tell them to act responsibly, while bad people will find a way around the laws." - Plato
~~~~~
BREAKING CHRISTIAN NEWS
http://breakingchristiannews.com/

# Even in Death, One of England's Great Men of History May Yet Again Help Change the World
# Singer Mark Schultz to Bike across America for Orphans and Widows
# Persecuted Professor Stands His Ground—Tells Other Christians to Step Forward
# Largest Hospital Ship, Africa Mercy, to Make Inaugural Trip to Africa

# A Day to Remember a Man Who Broke Down Barriers, and Set Records, Baseball's Jackie Robinson
# New Study Confirms Religion and Spirituality Play an Important Role in Health
# New Men's Church to Light the Fire for God
# "Jesus" Film Geared for Middle East Women is Being Shown and Distributed Around the Arab World

# Remembrance Day in Israel: Millions Stop Everything in Honor of Victims of Holocaust
# UK May Tackle Rising Youth Crime by Sending Criminally "Disruptive" Families to Rehabilitative "Sin Bins"
# World Outreach Sees An "Explosion of the Gospel" Around the World
# Local Communities Benefit From Church Conferences

# Christians Around the World Offer Prayers, Help for Virginia Tech
# Praise Report and Health Update on Youth Pastor Winkie Pratney
# Increasing Number of Doctors in the U.K. Refusing to Perform Abortions

# U.S. Supreme Court Rules in Favor of Ban on Partial Birth Abortion
# Virginia Tech Student's Quick-Thinking Saved Lives of His Classmates
# Founder of Group Working for Religious Freedom in China Receives Letter of Encouragement From President Bush
# Bishop Dies, Visits Heaven and Comes Back to Life

# Evel Knievel's Salvation Testimony Spurs Spontaneous Baptisms at Crystal Cathedral—500 to 800 Commitments & Rededications on Palm Sunday
# Feminists For Life Reacts to Supreme Court Ruling Upholding the Ban on Partial Birth Abortion
# Pastors Have Happiest, Most Satisfying Job of All According to New Study
# Vice-President of National Catholic Prayer Breakfast Believes President Bush is a "True Man of Faith"

# Father of a Virginia Tech Victim Forgives Shooter
# Virginia Tech Marching Uplifting Concert Brings Smiles to Wounded
# Mother of Handicapped Daughter Who Spent Decade Seeking Ban on Partial Birth Abortion Celebrates Ruling
# Is Attorney General Gonzalez under Condemnation Because He is Fighting Pornography?

Breaking Christian News
310 2nd Ave SE
Albany, Oregon 97321
541-928-2642
E-mail
US Orders: 1-866-358-7426

><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><>
GCF: Getting Younger

Emailed to me from another humor list (You Make Me Laugh) -Tom To subscribe to You Make Me Laugh, send a blank email to: SUBSCRIBE-laugh@lists.crosswalk.com

If this was forwarded to you, please consider your own subscription to Good Clean Fun. It's free! A smile will enhance the quality of your life. Just send an email to: good-clean-fun-subscribe@yahoogroups.com or visit the Good Clean Fun web site http://www.slonet.org/~tellswor/ Unsubscribe info for Good Clean Fun is at the end of this email. This email was scanned by Norton AntiVirus before it was sent.
----------------------------------------------

Old Sam Johnson goes to his doctor complaining of aches and pains all over his body. After a thorough examination, the doctor gives him a clean bill of health.

"Sam, you're in excellent shape for an 85 year old man. But I'm not a magician - I can't make you any younger," says the doctor.

"Who asked you to make me younger?" says Sam. "You just make sure I get older!"
_ ____________________________ _

GCF: A Day at the Races

Emailed to me by a friend (Thanks, Howard) -Tom
----------------------------------------------

A Rabbi is walking slowly down the street when a gust of wind blows his hat from his head. The hat is being blown down the street, but he is an old man, using a cane, and can't walk fast enough to catch the hat. Across the street a young man sees what has happened and rushes over to grab the hat and then returns it to the Rabbi.

"I don't think I would have been able to catch my hat," said the Rabbi. "Thank you very much." The Rabbi then places his hand on the man's shoulder and says, "May God bless you."

The young man thinks to himself, "I've been blessed by the Rabbi. This must be my lucky day!" So he goes to the Racetrack and in the first race he sees there is a horse named Stetson at 20 to 1. He bets $50 and sure enough the horse comes in first.

In the second race he sees a horse named Fedora at 30 to 1, so he bets it all and this horse comes in first also. Finally at the end of the day he returns home to his wife. When she asks him where he's been, he explains how he caught the Rabbi's hat and was blessed by him and then went to the track and started winning on horses that had a hat in their names.

"So where's the money?" she asks.

"I lost it all in the ninth race. I bet on a horse named Chateau and it lost."

"You fool, Chateau is a house, Chapeau is a hat!"

"It doesn't matter," he said, "the winner was some Japanese horse named Yarmulke."
_ ____________________________ _

GCF: Making a Will

Emailed to me by a friend (Thanks, Wally) -Tom
----------------------------------------------

A man went to his lawyer and said "I would like to make a will but I don't know exactly how to go about it."

The lawyer says "Don't worry. Leave it all to me."

The man looks somewhat upset ... "Well I knew you were going to take the biggest slice - but I'd like to leave a little to my children too!"
_ ____________________________ _

GCF: Hymns

Emailed to me by a friend (Thanks, JB) -Tom
----------------------------------------------

The minister was preaching on the evils of drink. He first said he would like to gather up all the wine and dump it in the river. Then he moved on to beer and said he would like to get all the beer and dump it in the river, and then all other forms of alcohol to be dumped into the river. The choir director's face began to show a worried look. The first hymn they were scheduled to sing was "Shall We Gather At The River?"
_ ____________________________ _

GCF: Talking About Others

Emailed to me by a friend (Thanks, Magnus) -Tom
----------------------------------------------

A young mother was riding the bus with her four year old boy when he suddenly blurted out so that everyone in the bus could hear, "Look mom, see that man's nose? It looks soooo funny!"

The mother was quite embarrassed and scolded her son. Then she whispered to him that if there was something he wanted to say about someone then he had to wait until they got home or at least where nobody could hear them, so that nobody would be sad.

A moment later the boy blurted out in the same loud voice, "Look mom, we've got to talk about that big fat lady when we get home!"
_ ____________________________ _
(((\ \>|_/ )____________________( \_| \\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ ////
\ / Back the Metric System \ /
\ _/ every inch of the way! \_ /
/ / \ \
(((\ \>|_/ )____________________( \_| \\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ ////
\ / If work is so terrific, \ /
\ _/ how come they have to pay \_ /
/ / you to do it? \ \
(((\ \>|_/ )____________________( \_| \\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ ////
\ /We blame fate for other accidents\ /
\ _/ but we feel personally responsible\_ /
/ / when we make a hole in one \ \
on the golf course.
(((\ \>|_/ )____________________( \_| \\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ ////
\ / Warning! Do not look at \ /
\ _/ laser with remaining eye. \_ /
/ / \ \
(((\ \>|_/ )____________________( \_| \\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ ////
\ / I married Miss Right. \ /
\ _/ I just didn't know her \_ /
/ / first name was Always. \ \
_ ____________________________ _
| Thomas S. Ellsworth |
| tellswor@slonet.org |
| http://www.slonet.org/~tellswor |
|___________________________|
Stop for a visit, leave with a smile! To join Good Clean Fun, email: good-clean-fun-subscribe@yahoogroups.Com To leave Good Clean Fun, email: good-clean-fun-unsubscribe@yahoogroups.Com Or visit the Good Clean Fun web site at http://www. slonet.org/~tellswor/
><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><>
A large, well-established Canadian lumber camp advertised that they were looking for a good lumberjack.

The very next day, a skinny little man showed up at the camp with his axe and knocked on the head lumberjack's door. The head lumberjack took one look at the little man and told him to leave.

"Just give me a chance to show you what I can do," said the skinny man.

"Okay, see that giant redwood over there?" said the lumberjack. "Take your axe and go cut it down."

The skinny man headed for the tree, and in five minutes he was back knocking on the lumberjack's door. "I cut the tree down," said the man.

The lumberjack couldn't believe his eyes and said, "Where did you get the skill to chop down trees like that?"

"In the Sahara Forest," replied the puny man.

"You mean the Sahara Desert," said the lumberjack.

The little man laughed and answered back, "Oh sure, that's what they call it now!"

Received from Thomas S. Ellsworth.

(-:][:-)

There is an old story about a mother who walks in on her six-year-old son and finds him sobbing. "What's the matter?" she asks.

"I've just figured out how to tie my shoes."

"Well, honey, that's wonderful." Being a wise mother, she recognizes his victory in the Eriksonian struggle of autonomy versus doubt: "You're growing up, but why are you crying?"

"Because," he says, "now I'll have to do it every day for the rest of my life."

Received from Cathy Gilstrap.

(-:][:-)

I have a friend who always seemed to lean slightly to the left all the time.

It used to bother me, so I suggested he see a doctor and have his legs checked out. For years, he refused and told me I was crazy.

But last week, he finally went, and sure enough, the doctor discovered his left leg was 1/4 inch shorter than his right.

A quick bit of orthopedic surgery later, he was cured. Both legs are exactly the same length now, and he no longer leans.

"So," I said, "you didn't believe me when I told you a doctor could fix your leg."

He just looked at me and said, "I stand corrected."

Received from Thomas S. Ellsworth.

(-:][:-)

We were celebrating the 100th anniversary of our church, and several former pastors and the bishop were in attendance. At one point, our minister had the children gather at the altar for a talk about the importance of the day. He began by asking, "Does anyone know what the bishop does?"

There was silence.

Finally, one little boy answered gravely, "He's the one you can move diagonally."

Received from You Make Me Laugh.

(-:][:-)

My pastor friend put sanitary hot air hand dryers in the restrooms at his church and after two weeks took them out.

I asked him why, and he confessed that they worked fine, but when he went into the men's restroom, he saw a sign that read:

"For a sample of this week's sermon, push the button."

Received from Pastor Tim.

(-:][:-)

-=+=-
Rate this funny at http://www.gcfl.net/archive.php?funny=20060113
Brought to you by GCFL.net: The Good, Clean Funnies List A cheerful heart is good medicine... (Prov 17:22a) Mail address: GCFL, Box 100, Harvest, AL 35749, USA
To print or email this funny to others, go to http://www.gcfl.net/archive.php?funny=20060113
The latest GCFL funny can always be found on the web at http://www.gcfl.net/latest.php
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SIGN IN A PHILADELPHIA WINDOW

"WE'D RATHER DO BUSINESS WITH 1 000 AL QAEDA TERRORISTS THAN WITH ONE
SINGLE AMERICAN."

This sign was prominently displayed in the window of a business in Philadelphia . You are probably outraged at the thought of such an inflammatory statement. One would think that anti-hate groups from all across the country would be marching on this business ... and that the National Guard might have to be called to keep the angry crowds back. But, perhaps in these stressful times one might be tempted to let the proprietors simply make their statement. We are a society which holds Freedom of Speech as perhaps our greatest liberty. And after all, it is just a sign.
Oh ... you may ask what kind of business would dare post such a sign?

Answer: A Funeral Home
(Who said morticians had no sense of humor?)

You gotta love it! God Bless America !

Life may not be the party we hoped for, but while we are here, we might
as well dance!!!

Thanks to Gary foreman
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Smart Judge

In Florida, an atheist became incensed over the preparation of Easter and Passover holidays. He decided to contact his lawyer about the discrimination inflicted on atheists by the constant celebrations afforded to Christians and Jews with all their holidays while atheists had no holiday to celebrate.

The case was brought before a wise judge. After listening to the long passionate presentation by the lawyer, the Judge banged his gavel and declare "Case dismissed!"

The lawyer immediately stood and objected to the ruling and said; "Your honor, how can you possibly dismiss this case? The Christians have Christmas, Easter and many other observances. Jews have Passover, Yom Kippur and Hanukkah... yet my client and all other atheists have no such holiday!"

The judge leaned forward in his chair and simply said; "Obviously your client is too confused to know about, or to celebrate the atheists' holiday!"

The lawyer pompously said; "We're unaware of any such holiday for atheists. Just when might that holiday be, your honor?"

The judge said; "Well it comes every year on exactly the same date---April 1st!" "The fool says in his heart, 'There is no God."' Psalm 14:1, Psalm 53

Thanks to Gary Foreman
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Only great minds can read this

fi yuo cna raed tihs, yuo hvae a sgtrane mnid too

Cna yuo raed tihs? Olny 55 plepoe out of 100 can.

i cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it dseno't mtaetr in waht oerdr the ltteres in a wrod are, the olny iproamtnt tihng is taht the frsit and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it whotuit a pboerlm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Azanmig huh? yaeh and I awlyas tghuhot slpeling was ipmorantt! if you can raed tihs forwrad it

Thanks to Joe Mullins
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A man's chain letter

This chain letter was started in hopes of bringing relief to other tired and discouraged men. Even the font is easy to read. Unlike most chain letters, this one doesn't cost anything!

Just send a copy of this letter to five of your male friends who are equally tired and discontent. Then bundle up your wife and/or girlfriend and send her to the man whose name appears at the top of the following list, and add your name to the bottom of the list.

When your turn comes, you will receive 15,625 women. One of them is bound to be better than the one you already have.

At the writing of this letter, a friend of mine had already received 184 women, four of whom were worth keeping.

This chain also brings good luck. One man's pit bull died, and the next day he received a Playboy playmate.

An unmarried Jewish man living with his widowed mother was able to choose between a Hooter's waitress and a Hollywood super model.

You can be lucky too, but DO NOT BREAK THE CHAIN! One man broke the chain and got his wife back again.

Let's keep it going, men! Just add your name to the list below.

----------------------

Bill Clinton
780 3rd Ave
New York, NY 10017

Billy Clinton
780 3rd Ave.
New York, NY 10017

Billie Clinton
780 3rd Ave.
New York, NY 10017

B. Clinton
780 3rd Ave.
New York, NY 10017

William Jefferson Clinton
780 3rd Ave.
New York, NY 10017

W. Jefferson Clinton
780 3rd Ave.
New York, NY 10017

W. Jeff Clinton
780 3rd Ave.
New York, NY 10017

W. J Clinton
780 3rd Ave.
New York, NY 10017

W. Clinton
780 3rd Ave.
New York, NY 10017

William J Clinton
780 3rd Ave.
New York, NY 10017

Willem Clinton
780 3rd Ave.
New York, NY 10017

Wilhelm Clinton
780 3rd Ave.
New York, NY 10017

Billy Clinton
780 3rd Ave.
New York , NY 10017

Willie Clinton
780 3rd Ave.
New York , NY 10017

Will Clinton
780 3rd Ave.
New York, NY 10017

Mr. Hillary Clinton
780 3rd Ave.
New York, NY 10017

Thanks to Jeanette Ford
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Many will recall that on July 8, 1947, witnesses claimed that an unidentified object with five aliens aboard crashed onto a sheep and cattle ranch just outside Roswell, New Mexico.

This is a well-known incident that many say has long been covered up by the U.S. Air Force and the federal government.

However, you may NOT know that in the month of March 1948, exactly nine months after that historic day, Albert Arnold Gore, Jr., Hillary Rodham, John F. Kerry, William Jefferson Clinton, Howard Dean, Nancy Pelosi, Dianne Feinstein, Charles E. Schumer, and Barbara Boxer were born.

See what happens when aliens breed with sheep?

Jeanette Ford
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WHY PARENTS go crazy!

A BOSS WONDERED WHY ONE OF HIS MOST VALUED EMPLOYEES HAD NOT PHONED IN SICK ONE DAY. HAVING AN URGENT PROBLEM WITH ONE OF THE MAIN COMPUTERS, HE DIALED THE EMPLOYEE'S HOME PHONE NUMBER AND WAS GREETED WITH A
CHILD'S WHISPER.

"HELLO ? "

"IS YOUR DADDY HOME?" HE ASKED.

" YES ," WHISPERED THE SMALL VOICE.

MAY I TALK WITH HIM?"

THE CHILD WHISPERED, " NO ."

SURPRISED AND WANTING TO TALK WITH AN ADULT, THE BOSS ASKED, "IS YOUR MOMMY THERE?"

" YES ."

"MAY I TALK WITH HER?"

AGAIN THE SMALL VOICE WHISPERED, " NO ."

HOPING THERE WAS SOMEBODY WITH WHOM HE COULD LEAVE A MESSAGE, THE BOSS ASKED, "IS ANYBODY ELSE THERE?"

" YES ," WHISPERED THE CHILD, " A POLICEMAN ".

WONDERING WHAT A COP WOULD BE DOING AT HIS EMPLOYEE'S HOME, THE BOSS ASKED, "MAY I SPEAK WITH THE POLICEMAN?"

" NO, HE'S BUSY ", WHISPERED THE CHILD.

"BUSY DOING WHAT?"

" TALKING TO DADDY AND MOMMY AND THE FIREMAN ," CAME THE WHISPERED ANSWER.

GROWING MORE WORRIED AS HE HEARD A LOUD NOISE IN THE BACKGROUND THROUGH THE EARPIECE ON THE PHONE, THE BOSS ASKED, "WHAT IS THAT NOISE?"

" A HELICOPTER " ANSWERED THE WHISPERING VOICE.

"WHAT IS GOING ON THERE?" DEMANDED THE BOSS, NOW TRULY APPREHENSIVE.

AGAIN, WHISPERING, THE CHILD ANSWERED, " THE SEARCH TEAM JUST LANDED A HELICOPTER."

ALARMED, CONCERNED AND A LITTLE FRUSTRATED THE BOSS ASKED, "WHAT ARE THEY SEARCHING FOR?"

STILL WHISPERING, THE YOUNG VOICE REPLIED WITH A MUFFLED GIGGLE... "ME."

Thanks to Jeanette Ford
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"Don't strive for recognition, but work for achievement." -- Vanessa Malone
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Madeleine Begun Kane Latest Columns - -
http://www.madkane.com
http://www.madkane.com/notable.html (Notables Weblog)
http://www.madkane.com/bush.html (Dubya's Dayly Diary)
Subscribe to MadKane Humor Newsletter (weekly) here:
http://www.madkane.com/email.html
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5 million of our older Americans have not signed up yet for their Medicare, Part D, drug plan------they are old and confused.
We are NOT going to grant them an extension.

However, 12 million illegal aliens are in our country and we are going to allow them to stay, protest, procreate, receive support monies, attend schools, avoid paying income taxes, have our teachers take 300 hours of ESL (English as a Second Language) training at our expense, etc.

WE MUST REALLY DISLIKE OUR OLD PEOPLE......
OR WE MUST REALLY LOVE TACOS!!!

Don't forget to pay your taxes......12 million illegal aliens are depending on you!

Thanks to Jeanette Ford
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We tried so hard to make things better for our kids that we made them worse.
For my grandchildren, I'd like better.

I'd really like for them to know about hand me down clothes and homemade
ice cream and leftover meat loaf sandwiches. I really would.

I hope you learn humility by being humiliated, and that you learn honesty by being cheated.

I hope you learn to make your own bed and mow the lawn and wash the car.

And I really hope nobody gives you a brand new car when you are sixteen.

It will be good if at least one time you can see puppies born and your old dog put to sleep.

I hope you get a black eye fighting for something you believe in.

I hope you have to share a bedroom with your younger brother/sister. And it's all right if you have to draw a line down the middle of the room, but when he wants to crawl under the covers with you because he's scared, I hope you let him.

When you want to see a movie and your little brother/sister wants to tag along, I hope you'll let him/her.

I hope you have to walk uphill to school with your friends and that you live in a town where you can do it safely.

On rainy days when you have to catch a ride, I hope you don't ask your driver to drop you two blocks away so you won't be seen riding with someone as uncool as your Mom.

If you want a slingshot, I hope your Dad teaches you how to make one instead of buying one.

I hope you learn to dig in the dirt and read books.

When you learn to use computers, I hope you also learn to add and subtract in your head.

I hope you get teased by your friends when you have your first crush on a boy\girl, and when you talk back to your mother that you learn what ivory soap tastes like.

May you skin your knee climbing a mountain, burn your hand on a stove and stick your tongue on a frozen flagpole.

I don't care if you try a beer once, but I hope you don't like it.
And if a friend offers you dope or a joint, I hope you realize he is not your friend.

I sure hope you make time to sit on a porch with your Grandma/Grandpa and go fishing with your Uncle.

May you feel sorrow at a funeral and joy during the holidays.

I hope your mother punishes you when you throw a baseball through your neighbor's window and that she hugs you and kisses you at Hannukah/Christmas time when you give her a plaster mold of your hand.

These things I wish for you - tough times and disappointment, hard work and happiness.
To me, it's the only way to appreciate life.

Written with a pen.
Sealed with a kiss.
I'm here for you.
And if I die before you do, I'll go to heaven and wait for you.

We secure our friends, not by accepting favors, but by doing them.

Paul Harvey RIDDLE:

When asked this riddle, 80% of kindergarten kids got the answer, compared to 17% of Stanford University seniors.

What is greater than God,
More evil than the devil,
The poor have it,
The rich need it,
And if you eat it,
you'll die?

Thanks to Larry Johnson
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| Safety from the Heart |
-----------------------------------------------------
April 19, 2007

Shocking Stats
------------------------------------------------------------
At 35 mph, a 2 second lapse in attention means you've traveled 100 feet without looking!

Teens are much more likely to be distracted when traveling with other teens.

Teach Teens to "Keep Your Hands on the Wheel to Avoid Distractions"

There are all kinds of distractions that can take our eyes off the road.
Here's a way to help maintain your attention:

Keep both hands on the wheel while driving
Don't talk on the phone without a hands-free accessory
Wait 'til the next stoplight to change that CD
Don't drive with passengers until you are more experienced

Parent's Tip: Don't remind your teen of all the possible distractions.
Instead, enforce keeping your hands on the wheel and you'll avoid most of the distractions that cause serious crashes.

Source: Safe Young Drivers, Phil Berardelli
_________________________________
| Safety from the Heart |
-----------------------------------------------------
April 18, 2007
Today's Safety From the Heart message was submitted by David Andrews.

Inspect Your Lawn-mower

Please inspect your lawn-mower and other gasoline-powered devices. After starting up a riding lawn-mower last season, I noticed a clear liquid coming from under the front cowling. After a very brief mental checklist (no radiator to leak, no A/C to give condensation, unfortunately), I realized it could only be fuel. Not good. I turned the engine off and took a step back. The leak stopped quickly, and although the engine should still have been cold, I decided this was a good time to pause for reflection.

Upon inspection, a very brittle fuel line was found (see picture). The sharp crook is where the leak occurred, but the whole line was shot. A trip to the local auto store and three dollars later: problem solved. This could have cost a LOT more if it had lit.

The lawn-mower is only seven years old, but apparently that's long enough.
I'd suggest at least an annual inspection for things like this. The cracking would have been obvious if I had just bothered to look.
_________________________________
| Safety from the Heart |
-----------------------------------------------------
April 16, 2007
Spring Cleaning Safety Tips
Today's Message is from Sandy Barclay (a Houston Albemarle employee).

It's spring cleaning time again. Please don't overdo it. This includes
getting too hot when working in the yard or trying to do too much when
working inside. Here are some safety tips from the American Academy of
Pediatrics.

Choose nontoxic products for your spring cleaning. For example, vinegar and water is an inexpensive and effective window cleaning solution.
Time to move the furniture? Place cribs, playpens and other furniture away from the window and accessible drapery cords. Children can climb up on furniture and fall out of the window or get strangled in the cords.
Make sure window guards/bars are secure, and know how to open the window in case of fire. Screens do not prevent window falls.
Test all your smoke alarms to ensure they are working. Change the batteries at least once every year. Most smoke alarms also need "spring cleaning" maintenance - check your manual.
Develop and practice a family fire escape plan in case of emergency.
Consider installing carbon monoxide alarms in your home.
Make sure small parts, plastic bags, small toys, balloons or any other choking hazards are out of reach of young children, particularly those less than 36 months of age.
Check your home for recalled and banned children's products. To find out about recalled products, go to http://www.recalls.gov
Keep traffic areas free of clutter, toys and rugs in order to avoid tripping with your child in your arms.
Doors that lead to the basement should have a self-latching lock to prevent children from falling down the stairs.
Post the Poison Help Line number (1-800-222-1222) and your pediatrician's number on all phones.
_________________________________
| Safety from the Heart |
-----------------------------------------------------
April 11, 2007
Teen Driving Safety Tips

Shocking Stats
------------------------------------------------------------
In the last decade, over 68,000 teens have died in car crashes.

Motor vehicle crashes are the leading cause of death for American teenagers.

Teen Driving Safety Tips
Make It Old, Solid and Bold

Some parents may want to buy a brand new car for their teen's first vehicle, however, it may not be the best vehicle to learn in. If you must buy your teen a car, here are some tips...

OLD, LARGE and SOLID

Think classic station wagon or full-size sedan with a small engine

Check the vehicle's history to assure that it's a safe and reliable vehicle

Parent's Tip: "Old, large and solid" may not be the words your teenager wants to hear, but they'll like them better than "take the bus."

Source: Safe Young Drivers, Phil Berardelli
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Our Church, Magnolia Christian Center, has the following mission statement. Our purpose is to build a great church for the glory of God through the great commission and the great commandment. MCC' Vision - That MCC will be a place hopping with children, energized with teenagers, balanced with diversity and transformed by the power of God! We want to turn uninterested people into interested people and win the lost to make fully devoted followers of Christ. www.mcc2000.net
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TOURBUS - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -:) - :)- :)
Volume 12, Number 35 --- 16 Apr 2007
Tourbus Home -- http://www.InternetTourbus.com

+---------------------------------------+
TODAY'S TOURBUS TOPICS: Bluetooth / GPS / Bad Passwords

In today's TOURBUS, you'll learn about Bluetooth technology and how to choose a GPS system. And is your password easy for hackers to guess? Find out how to pick a good password, and get the scoop on so-called "hidden" items on Myspace profiles. Oh, and this just in, Firefox may be LESS secure than Internet Explorer... Read on!

-----------------------------------
What WAS That Thing in Uhura's Ear?
-----------------------------------

This is the age of wireless devices. Information is relevant only if it is accessible anywhere and everywhere. Everything from phones to computers to games and gadgets is going wireless, thanks in part to a technology called Bluetooth.

Bluetooth enables two devices, usually within a short range, to connect without wires by using low power radio waves. Bluetooth technology can be applied to a wide range of devices in areas like medicine, software, and mobile communications. Read on to learn how Bluetooth technology is making wireless connections at home, at the office, and on the go...

http://askbobrankin.com/what_is_bluetooth.html

-------------------------
Which GPS Should You Buy?
-------------------------

GPS (Global Positioning System) navigation systems can help you find your way around, but navigating all the GPS choices can be just as challenging as traveling without one.

GPS devices rely on satellites that orbit the earth to calculate your exact position on the ground. Basic devices will give you the precise time, your longitude, latitude, altitude as well as your speed in realtime. The features and quality of GPS systems vary widely, so check out my guidelines and recommendations for the best GPS systems here:

http://askbobrankin.com/which_gps_should_i_buy.html

-----------------------------
Is Your Password Good Enough?
-----------------------------

A reader concerned about password security wrote this:
"With identify theft so common now, I'm very concerned that my passwords may not be good enough. Can you give me some tips to picking good passwords that can't be easily guessed by hackers?"

I agree that it's important to create secure passwords to prevent identity theft. With so many points of entry into your privacy -- email, banking, online shopping and social networking -- all too often people find out too late their passwords have been compromised.

In most cases, that's because they were simply too easy to guess.
It's not so hard to create a strong, secure password... but there are some pitfalls to avoid. Learn how to compose a good password, avoid some really BAD passwords and keep it safe afterwards. Read on for some tips to make the keys to your identity a tougher lock to pick.

http://askbobrankin.com/secure_passwords.html

-----------------------
Is Firefox LESS Secure?
-----------------------

The recent ANI (animated cursor) exploit that has been talked about so much in security and tech forums was first believed to affect only Internet Explorer V7. Firefox fans wagged their fingers at IE users again and chided them for not switching to the "more secure" browser.

But it turns out that Firefox is also vulnerable to this very serious exploit on Windows Vista systems. Even worse, the bug is potentially MORE destructive on Firefox than with IE7, with no fix in sight...

http://askbobrankin.com/is_firefox_more_secure.html

------------------------------------
Hiding Stuff in Your Myspace Profile
------------------------------------

I get a lot of questions about how to hide (or reveal hidden items) on Myspace profiles. One person asked me this:

"On a Myspace profile, how do I hide the location and last login?
I've seen other pages like this and it seems like a good idea for extra privacy on Myspace."

A lot of people think that they can boost privacy on Myspace by hiding their gender, age, location or the display of the last login on Myspace. And for reasons I don't understand, a lot of people want to hide their Myspace "friends" list. NEWS FLASH! A hidden friends list on Myspace, or any other hidden profile items are not truly hidden, at least not very well.

If you want to hide things for esthetic reasons, then fine. But don't fool yourself into thinking that people can't find them with a few clicks. Here's the scoop on hiding and revealing elements of a Myspace profile...

http://askbobrankin.com/hiding_profile_items.html
+---------------------------------------+
That's all for now, see you next time! -- Bob Rankin
+---------------------------------------+

==[ Tourbus Rider Information ]==
The Internet Tourbus - U.S. Library of Congress ISSN #1094-2238 Copyright 1995-2005, Rankin & Crispen - All rights reserved Tourbus News Service - http://tourbus.com/news.html Subscribe, Signoff, Archives, Free Stuff and More at the Tourbus Website - http://www.TOURBUS.com
========================
.~~~. ))
(\__/) .' ) )) Patrick Douglas Crispen
/o o \/ .~
{o_, \ { crispen@netsquirrel.com
/ , , ) \ http://www.netsquirrel.com/
`~ -' \ } )) AOL Instant Messenger: Squirrel2K
_( ( )_.'
---..{____} Warning: squirrels.
><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><>
Activities and Events of Interest

Saturday, April 21/2007 and Sunday, April 22/2007, Defenders of Liberty Barksdale AFB Air Show. Gates Open at 9:am Special Performances by... F-15E Strike Eagle Demo, U.S. Army Black Daggers, Air Force Reserve’s Ed Hamill, C-17 Globemaster III Demo, Shockwave, Gene Soucy & Teresa Stokes, Wyche Coleman, Bill Stein, C-130, A-10, B-2, F-117, Tora 101, MiG-17
http://www.barksdaleafbairshow.com/index.html
~~~
19th Annual Magnolia Blossom Festival & World Championship Steak Cook-Off
May 18 - May 19, 2007
~~~
The Emancipation Proclamation will be on display at the Clinton Library September 22-25, 2007.
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"September 11 WDYTJWD" W. P. Florence
Justice first, then peace."
"September 11" Never forget.--Tony Moses
"ONE NATION UNDER GOD ...the only way"--Phillip Story
"We have nothing to fear but fear itself." -- Franklin D. Roosevelt
"Keeping my head down but face toward Heaven" - - Jody Eldred, ABC News Cameraman in Kuwait
"Remember Pearl Harbor? Remember 9/11!" --"Bug"
Tell the people you love that you love them, at every opportunity. - - George Carlin
"Stop telling God how big your storm is. Instead, tell the storm how big your God is!" - - Queen E. Watson
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Weekly Toll - - http://weeklytoll.blogspot.com/
Death In The Workplace w/News & Updates
John Donne - ...any man's death diminishes me, because I am involved in mankind, and therefore never send to know for whom the bell tolls; it tolls for thee.
A partial list of workplace fatalities.

NY - The accidental death of a Purdue University student is raising questions among authorities and students about facilities’ safety, but University of Tennessee officials are confident that UT is immune to such a tragedy. After an exhaustive two-month search for Purdue freshman Wade Steffey, who had been missing since Jan. 13, the student’s body was discovered on March 19 in an unmarked, high-voltage transformer room in the basement of a residence hall. Investigators speculate that Steffey unwittingly entered the room the night he disappeared after returning home from the campus’ fraternity park and was electrocuted by exposed parts.

VIENNA — A Youngstown man died Monday morning after being crushed by a hangar door

TX - Lee Dell Carrington, Jr., 41, died Thursday when the large riding lawnmower he was using to mow in A. A. Lane Park in Killeen flipped over on top of him.

SEMINOLE, FL - A construction worker was killed when the bucket on a large backhoe swung around and struck him in the head,

GA - A man who was injured last week when a tractor-trailer tire exploded has died,

DEERFIELD BEACH, Fla. -- A worker is dead after a loading-dock incident at a Publix warehouse in Deerfield Beach. Rescuers said Keith L. Jackson, 37, of Sunrise, was pinned then crushed by a tractor-trailer that was backing into a loading dock

Lubbock,TX - A gruesome accident takes the life of a young man on a Floyd County oil rig. Floyd County officials say the victim was 23-year-old Brandon Garrett of Levelland. They say it all happened Easter Sunday around three in the afternoon at the Patterson UTI oil rig about 12 miles east of Floydada. Floyd County sheriff`s department says a worker got caught in a winch, which is a large machine that is used to coil rope or chains for hoisting or hauling. The sheriff`s department also says Garrett became tangled up in the cables and they even pulled him.

DEERFIELD BEACH, Fla. -- A warehouse worker was killed Monday after he was crushed between a tractor-trailer and a loading dock,

Detroit,MI - An 18-year-old man who worked at Detroit Metro Airport was killed Monday night after he was struck by an aircraft tug,

SPALDING COUNTY, Ga. -- 10:45 UPDATE: DOT officials say the victim was operating a steam roller. He tried to climb down off the equipment, lost his balance and fell under the steam roller.

Las Vegas, NV - A maintenance worker died Friday when he fell about five stories inside an elevator shaft at a Las Vegas Strip resort and landed on an empty service elevator car,

Flash fire at water treatment plant injures two workers TX - It happened while the two workers were sandblasting a high pressure tank at a water treatment plant

Stayton, OR - A 72-year old Stayton man, employed by Freres Lumber Company for more than 50 years, died Thursday from injuries he sustained when he was crushed by a reversing logging truck,

GULFPORT, MS – A forklift operator was killed today while moving a beam at a work site in Gulfport, said Harrison County Coroner Gary Hargrove. Hargrove said Michael Walker, 44, was moving an I-beam when his forklift flipped over. It fell on top of him, and pinned him underneath the large piece of equipment.

Lansing, MI Lansing police Friday confirmed that an Advance Auto Parts employee crushed to death by a car he was working on

GAYLORD, MI — A Cheboygan County man was killed in a logging accident on Bois Blanc Island. Police said employees of Northwood Timber Products were working to repair a piece of logging equipment that was raised and supported with timber. The supports apparently failed and the equipment fell to the ground and struck an employee

HICKMAN, AR - Mississippi County Sheriff's deputies are investigating the mysterious death of a Blytheville man who apparently died early this morning at the Nucor steel mill at Hickman, just northeast of Blytheville. According to a police report, deputies were called to the Hickman mill at 7:15 a.m., where they found the body of 30-year-old Casey Ray. Ray, an employee at the mill, reportedly went inside a "silo" to do maintenance work at 2:30 a.m. He was reportedly last heard from by co-workers at 4:30 a.m.

Chesnee, SC - Cherokee County Coroner Dennis Fowler has ruled the death of a 22-year-old employee at the ADS plant in Gaffney an accident. Fowler said 22-year-old Travis C. Wood of 351 Green Lake Road, Chesnee, died of massive internal injuries sustained Monday in the 5:10 p.m. accident at the plant located at 34 Commerce Drive. Wood was pronounced dead at Upstate Carolina Medical Center. An autopsy was performed Tuesday. Wood was wearing a body harness attached to a "picker lift." Authorities believe Wood's lift struck a fork lift that was in front of him. "Wood was on a lift that was 31 feet, 8 inches in the air," Fowler said. "He moved (the lift) forward, striking the rear of another forklift. Apparently when he struck it, then the lift began to go off balance. It fell with him still tethered to it."

Greenbrier , AR - A Greenbrier man died when a drilling pipe loaded onto the back of a truck fell and struck him in the head.

NEW YORK -- A 19-year-old Ecuadorean man has succumbed to injuries he sustained after about 7,000 pounds of marble stone fell on him.

Ormond Beach, FL - Investigators said a hotel worker who was trying to help out some guests fell to his death in Ormond Beach. It happened at the Casa Del Mar Resort in Ormond Beach on Sunday, WESH 2 News reported. Police said Terry Luchterhand was trying to climb over to the balcony of a room that some guests were locked out of.

UT - A 45-year-old worker (Alaman-Renderoz) died today after falling 35 feet off of scaffolding

SAN ANTONIO TX -- A Time Warner employee died Monday afternoon while working at a Northeast Side business, police said. Michael Billings, 55, was up on a ladder cutting a line near Interstate 35 and Thousand Oaks when he lost his balance and fell 25 or 30 feet,

Seattle, WA -- The fast-response boats nicknamed "defenders," which travel alongside Washington state ferries, have been among the most visible symbols of the Coast Guard's security efforts since Sept. 11, 2001 -- a day that changed the life of Ronald A. Gill Jr. He was a product of a Rhode Island technical school working as a chef. But watching television replays of terrorist planes hitting the World Trade Center, Gill felt a calling to protect this country, his dad said. The petty officer 3rd class was doing security patrols and training north of Vashon Island on Sunday when he fell off one of the 25-foot boats. He hit the propeller, suffering skull fractures, cerebral lacerations and cerebral contusions,

Mobile, AL - A 34-year-old Mobile man on a crew replacing the roof of a gymnasium at Bishop State Community College's main campus near downtown died this morning when the roof collapsed and he fell through the hole and hit the gym floor,

Bethlehem, PA - A Bethlehem man suffered a fatal head injury in a fall at McLean Packaging Corp. in Nazareth and died Sunday at St. Luke's Hospital-Fountain Hill, the Lehigh County coroner's office said Tuesday. Lehigh County Coroner Scott Grim ruled the death of Thomas Stout, 62, of 1718 10th St. an accident. The accident happened March 29 at 2:30 p.m. at 149 W. Prospect St., when Stout fell backward off a step, landing on a concrete floor,

HOUSTON, TX - Searchers in the Houston area today worked to recover the body of a man who drowned at a job site -- on his first day. Authorities say the accident happened yesterday when a tunnel collapsed under Cypress Creek, in northwest Harris County. Crews were building a 42-inch water line. Officials say 22-year-old Cornelio Salvador Moreno apparently drowned.

Brighton, UT - A 45-year-old worker who fell to his death at a house near Brighton ski resort Monday has been identified as Francisco Antonio Alaman-Renderoz, of Tooele. Alaman-Renderoz died when he fell about 35 feet from scaffolding while pouring a concrete foundation

Charleston, SC -- A worker putting up a fence behind a church was electrocuted Thursday when a piece of metal on his tractor struck a power line,

Charleston, SC -- A truck driver was killed at the Nucor steel plant shortly before noon Thursday when a steel beam being loaded onto his truck fell on him.

CHARLOTTE AMALIE, U.S. Virgin Islands (AP) - Puerto Rican jockey Manuel Caraballo has died after being trampled during a race, authorities in the U.S. Virgin Islands said Monday. Caraballo, a jockey with more than 40 years experience who was semiretired, fell from his horse Emilin on Sunday

ALBANY, NY -- A veteran firefighter collapsed and died Monday after he entered a burning apartment on the sixth-floor of a city high-rise to save anyone possibly trapped inside, authorities said. Theodore Abriel, 44, of Slingerlands, suffered a massive heart attack after he went into apartment 6E of 2 Lincoln Square, which was empty, police said. Police said Abriel was wearing 75 pounds of equipment as he and another member of the department's Rescue Squad climbed six floors to reach apartment 6E of the building, where a fire had been reported at 4:40 p.m. After Abriel checked the apartment and found no one inside, he collapsed

JOHNSTOWN — A Centerburg man, H. Trent Budinot, 42, 4490 Homer Road, was killed in a machinery accident Friday morning in a silo on Heimerl Farms near Johnstown. The Licking County Sheriff’s Office, which investigated the accident, said Budinot was performing maintenance on a feed mixer inside a silo when he became trapped inside the mixer.

NEW HARTFORD, N.Y.-- The New York State Office of Fire Prevention and Control has reported the line of duty death of Firefighter Michael D. Sowich. He died March 2 while attending a training program at the National Fire Academy in Emmitsburg, Md.

EAU CLAIRE, Wis.-- Authorities in Eau Claire County say a 16-year-old driver became blinded by the sun and collided with a truck pulling a trailer, killing the truck's driver.

Las Vegas, NV -- A worker died after falling at a Henderson construction

AIRMONT, NY - A truck driver for an Orange County ice-cream company died yesterday after he crashed into the concrete pillar of a New York State Thruway overpass.

PRINCEVILLE, Hawaii -- A tour helicopter crashed at an airport on the island of Kauai on Thursday, killing four people

SCOTTSBLUFF Neb. -- A 25-year-old Scottsbluff man died Wednesday when the wall of a trench he was working in collapsed and buried him in 10 feet of dirt.

SKANDIA TOWNSHIP, Mich. -- An ambulance on an emergency run crashed into a logging truck along an Upper Peninsula road, killing the patient and one of the three ambulance crew members,

BUCKTOWN Pa.-- A man working on the roof of a condominium-style home in a development fell three stories to his death, police said. The man apparently was putting down sheathing, typically installed in sheets about 4 feet by 8 feet, in extremely windy conditions

Lexington, KY -- A construction accident yesterday morning killed one man and sent two others to the hospital. The accident occurred about 7:30 a.m. at 2292 Barnwell Lane, where a house is under construction, authorities said. Everardo Tellez-Gervacio, 31, was struck by a large, wooden platform attached to a forklift, said Fayette County Coroner Gary Ginn, who estimated the platform, used in place of traditional scaffolding, to be about 15 feet long by 4 feet wide.

New Orleans, LA -- An armed security guard responsible for keeping watch over a lot full of FEMA trailers was fatally shot early Monday morning in the Gentilly neighborhood,

Newark, NJ -- A Newark police sergeant was killed early Saturday morning when his car flipped over as he chased a handcuffed suspect

New Raymer, CO -- One truck driver was killed late Thursday when two semis smashed head-on on Colorado 14

BOSTON, MA -- A truck driver was killed Friday after his tractor-trailer rolled down an embankment on Interstate 495

Lincoln, NE -- A farm accident in Fillmore County killed an 80-year-old Exeter man and injured his son-in-law Wednesday morning.At about 10:29 a.m. John W. (Bill) Leif was caught in the power takeoff of a tractor at a bin site northeast of Exeter,

OAKLAND PARK, Fla. -- The Florida Highway Patrol has identified the truck driver who was hit by a car and killed on Interstate 95

Indianapolis, IN -- A truck driver from Greencastle died this morning after police say he apparently suffered a heart attack and lost control of his semi-tractor trailer on the Northside.

FORT WORTH, TX -- A 43-year-old Dallas man died Thursday after a construction machine he was driving rolled on its side, trapping him underneath,

HOLDREGE Neb. -- A Holdrege man died after suffering injuries in a work-related mishap involving a skid loader,

Chicago, IL -- A man shot to death Tuesday as he worked in the corner market he owned occasionally was targeted for thefts, a friend said. Abraham Alshwaiat, 60, was shot

TRINIDAD, CO-- The driver of a water tanker truck is dead after being ejected from the vehicle on an unnamed road in the Colorado State Wildlife Area Tuesday morning, about 21 miles west of town.

LODI, NJ -- A truck driver died early Monday when he lost control of his 18-wheeler and slammed into a concrete column on a snowy stretch of Route 17, police said. Thomas Burke, 76, of Newburgh, N.Y., was pronounced dead at the scene.

WESTPORT, RI - A tractor-trailer heading eastbound on Route 195 rolled over onto the median yesterday morning, killing the driver and snarling traffic for much of the day.

Employee fatally shot at bank He was making a cash deposit near Rosemont for his fast-food restaurant.

http://weeklytoll.blogspot.com/2007/04/weekly-toll-death-in-american-workplace.html
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NEVER FORGET! We're listing the names of our soldiers killed weekly. These records can be found at http://www.defenselink. mil/releases/

01. 1ST Lt. Gwilym J. Newman, 24, of California, died April 12 in Tarmiyah, Iraq, of wounds sustained from enemy small arms fire while on dismounted patrol. He was assigned to the 2nd Battalion, 8th Cavalry Regiment, 1st Brigade Combat Team, 1st Cavalry Division, Fort Hood, Texas.

02. Sgt. Edelman L. Hernandez, 23, of Hyattsville, Md., died April 11 in Korengal Valley, Afghanistan, while on combat patrol. The incident is under investigation. He was assigned to the 1st Battalion, 32nd Infantry Regiment, 3rd Brigade Combat Team, 10th Mountain Division (Light Infantry), Fort Drum, N.Y.

03. Spc. James T. Lindsey, 20, of Florence, Ala., died April 12 in Baghdad, Iraq, of wounds sustained when his vehicle struck an improvised explosive device. He was assigned to the 3rd Battalion, 509th Infantry Regiment, 4th Brigade Combat Team, 25th Infantry Division, Fort Richardson, Alaska.

The Department of Defense announced the death of two soldiers who were supporting Operation Enduring Freedom. They died April 12 in Miri, Afghanistan, when their vehicle was struck by an improvised explosive device during combat operations. They were assigned to the 2nd Battalion, 508th Parachute Infantry Regiment, 4th Brigade Combat Team, 82nd Airborne Division, Fort Bragg, N.C. Killed were:
04. Staff Sgt. Casey D. Combs, 28, of Auburn, Wash.
05. Sgt. David A. Stephens, 28, of Tullahoma, Tenn.

06. Lance Cpl. Daniel J. Santee, 21, of Mission Viejo, Calif., died April 14 from a non-hostile vehicle accident in Al Anbar province, Iraq. Santee was assigned to Combat Logistics Regiment 27, 2nd Marine Logistics Group, II Marine Expeditionary Force, Camp Lejeune, N.C.

07. Sgt. Larry R. Bowman, 29, of Granite Falls, N.C., died April 13 in Baghdad, Iraq, of wounds suffered when his vehicle struck an improvised explosive device. Bowman was assigned to the 513th Transportation Company, 57th Transportation Battalion, 593rd Corps Support Group, Fort Lewis, Wash.

The Department of Defense announced the death of two soldiers who were supporting Operation Iraqi Freedom. Both died Apr. 12 in Baghdad, Iraq, when their patrol encountered an improvised explosive device. They were assigned to the 1st Squadron, 40th Cavalry Regiment, 4th Brigade Combat Team, 25th Infantry Division, Fort Richardson, Alaska. Killed were:
08. Cpl. Cody A. Putman, 22, of Lafayette, Ind.
09. Spc. John G. Borbonus, 19, of Boise, Idaho.

10. Spc. Ryan A. Bishop, 32, of Euless, Texas, died April 14 in Baghdad, Iraq, of wounds sustained when an improvised explosive device detonated while he was on dismounted patrol. He was assigned to the 4th Battalion, 31st Infantry Regiment, 2nd Brigade Combat Team, 10th Mountain Division (Light Infantry), Fort Drum, N.Y.

11. 1st Lt. Shaun M. Blue, 25, of Munster, Ind., died April 16 while conducting combat operations in Al Anbar province, Iraq. He was assigned to 2nd Battalion, 7th Marine Regiment, 1st Marine Division, I Marine Expeditionary Force, Twentynine Palms, Calif.

12. Lance Cpl. Daniel R. Scherry, 20, of Rocky River, Ohio, died April 16 from a non-hostile accident in Al Anbar province, Iraq. Scherry was assigned to 1st Battalion, 2nd Marine Regiment, 2nd Marine Division, II Marine Expeditionary Force, Camp Lejeune, N.C.

13. Lance Cpl. Jesse D. Delatorre, 29, of Aurora, Ill., died April 16 from wounds suffered while conducting combat operations in Al Anbar province, Iraq. Delatorre was assigned to 2nd Battalion, 7th Marine Regiment, 1st Marine Division, I Marine Expeditionary Force, Twentynine Palms, Calif.

14. The Department of Defense announced the death of a soldier who was supporting Operation Iraqi Freedom. Pfc. Lucas V. Starcevich, 25, of Canton, Ill., died April 16 in Baghdad, Iraq, of wounds sustained when the vehicle he was in struck an improvised explosive device. He was assigned to the 1st Battalion, 18th Infantry Regiment, 2nd Brigade Combat Team, 1st Infantry Division, Schweinfurt, Germany.

The Department of Defense announced the death of two soldiers who were supporting Operation Iraqi Freedom. They died Apr. 14 in Fallujah, Iraq, when an improvised explosive device detonated near their vehicle. They were assigned to the 1451st Transportation Company, 13th Support Command, Iraq. Killed were:
15. Sgt. Joshua A. Schmit, 26, of Willmar, Minn.
16. Sgt. Brandon L. Wallace, 27, of St. Louis, Mo.

17. The Department of Defense announced the death of a soldier who was supporting Operation Iraqi Freedom. Pfc. Aaron M. Genevie, 22, of Chambersburg, Pa., died April 16 in Baghdad, Iraq, of wounds sustained when his vehicle struck an improvised explosive device. He was assigned to the 1st Squadron, 4th Cavalry Regiment, 4th Infantry Brigade Combat Team, 1st Infantry Division, Fort Riley, Kansas.

18. The Department of Defense announced today the death of a soldier who was supporting Operation Iraqi Freedom. Pfc. Steven J. Walberg, 18, of Paradise, Calif., died April 15 in Baghdad, Iraq, of wounds sustained from enemy small arms fire. He was assigned to the 1st Squadron, 4th Cavalry Regiment, 4th Infantry Brigade Combat Team, 1st Infantry Division, Fort Riley, Kansas.

19. The Department of Defense announced today the death of a soldier who was supporting Operation Iraqi Freedom. Sgt. Mario K. De Leon, 26, of San Francisco, Calif., died April 16 in Baghdad, Iraq, of wounds sustained from enemy small arms fire. He was assigned to the 1st Battalion, 18th Infantry Regiment, 2nd Brigade Combat Team, 1st Infantry Division, Schweinfurt, Germany.

20. Staff Sgt. Robert J. Basham, 22, of Kenosha, Wis., died Apr. 14 at Camp As Sayliyah in Doha, Qatar, as a result of injuries from a non-combat incident. His death is under investigation.

21. Pfc. Richard P. Langenbrunner, 19, of Fort Wayne, Ind., died Apr. 17 in Rustamiyah, Iraq, of injuries suffered from a non-combat related incident. His death is under investigation.

22. Pfc. Jason M. Morales, 20, of La Puente, Calif., died April 18 in Baghdad, Iraq, of injuries sustained when his unit came in contact with enemy forces using small arms fire. He was assigned to the 1st Battalion, 28th Infantry Regiment, 4th Brigade Combat Team, 1st Infantry Division, and Fort Riley, Kan.

http://icasualties.org/oif/default.aspx
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Please remember to pray for the American soldiers stationed everywhere around the globe and especially in Iraq. Times have been and are very tough and it would be nice if you would all just say a prayer for their safety and for their families.
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Scheduled Activities
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Columbia County Amateur Radio Club meets Every second Thursday @ 7:00 p.m. Union Street Station. And YOU'RE invited. Net is every Sunday at 20:30 on 147.105.
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MCC - "Faith Builders" Small group meets the second and fourth Tuesdays, 6:30 pm to 7:45 pm.
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MCC - Mom's Day Out - Every Tuesday and Thursday from 9 to 2.$10 for the first child, $5 for the second. Call 234-3225 for reservations.
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MCC - Nursing Home Ministry - Meadowbrook Every Tuesday from 10 to 11 am. Taylor, the last Thursday each month.
~~~
Men's Prayer Breakfast held every Tuesday morning at 6 AM in Miller's Cafeteria. If you aren't a regular participant at the Men's Prayer Breakfast, you're missing some great food, fellowship and inspired teaching of the Word. Hope to see you there.
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Emergency Phone Number 911
(Fire, Police, Ambulance, Sheriff, etc. )
Central Dispatch 234-5655
(Non - Emergency Number)
Direct Numbers
Ambulance - 234-7371 (24 Hour)
Jail - 234-5331 (24 Hour)
Poison Control - 800-222-1222 (24 Hour)
http://www. aapcc. org/
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"There is not enough darkness in the world to put out the light of one candle."
"Laugh whenever you can and cry if you need to." -- "Bug"
"I read the end of the book. We win!" -- "Bug"
"We may not be able to cure the world, but we don't have to make it sicker." -- "Bug"
"There just ain't enough fingers for all the holes in the dike." - - "Bug"
"It's no big deal doing what God tells you to do. A big deal would be NOT doing what God tells you to do. Just ask Jonah." - - Paul Troquille
"A simple way to take measure of a country is to look at how many want in ... and how many want out." - - Tony Blair
"Information is the currency of democracy." - Jefferson
~~~~~
Hope you enjoy the newsletter.
Again, thanks to all our contributors this week.

God bless and GOD BLESS AMERICA!!!
Psa 115:9-15 Psa 119:149-156 Isa 60:15-17 2 Chr 35:20-23 The John 3:16 Wall: http://www.e-min.org/j316wall.htm http://www.e-min.org/
God is Good and Faithful CU 73 IC JFM CSP NREMT-I KC5HII

P. S. If you'd like to be added to the distribution, just drop us E-mail at KC5HII@Magnolia-Net.Com. We offer "Da Bleat" as text, a "Blog" and as a newsletter with pictures in Word and PDF format. The latest issue is usually updated sometime Saturday. For the "Blog" version just go to one of the several addresses on the web. For the latest issue, go to http://www.bugsbleat.blogspot.com. Older issues can be found at http://www.bugsbleat_q__.blogspot.com, where _ is the quarter (1, 2, 3, or 4) and __ is the year (05, 06, or 07). We also have a site [http://bugsbleatphotos.blogspot.com/] where we post photos that I like.
Let us hear from you if we can switch you over to the "Word" or "PDF" version of "Da Bleat".
If you'd prefer to read "Da Blog" version, just drop us a note at KC5HII@Magnolia-Net.Com and we'll switch you from e:mail delivery to "Da Bleat" Blog. We appreciate your encouragement. We also appreciate your communication when you desire to be taken off our mail list. If you are on this mail list by mistake or do not wish to receive "Da Bleat," please reply back and tell us to discontinue service to you. This email was scanned by Norton AntiVirus 2007 before it was sent.
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Bug's Bleat - - GCF: The Cantor

Volume 9, Issue 15 Friday, April 13, 2007

Hello All,

Our new “TriCaster” is proving to be all it was promised. Switching cameras is smooth and innovational. Downloading video is easier than we dreamed. Keep watching Sudden Link’s Magnolia Channel 13 at 1:30 pm and 8:00 pm on Sundays to see how we do...
[http://shop.newtek.com/index.asp?PageAction=VIEWPROD&ProdID=24] [http://catalog2.panasonic.com/webapp/wcs/stores/servlet/ModelDetail?displayTab=O&storeId=11201&catalogId=13051&itemId=98187&catGroupId=14571&surfModel=AG-DVC20]
~~~~~
The following video from Google Video is one of my (and David's favorite)

Operation Red Flag - - 46 min 12 sec - May 10, 2006
Description: The video is about USAF and allied forces.
http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-317591162016551876&q=39012&pr=goog-sl

Want to see more cool videos?
Go to video.google.com/
~~~~~
Greetings from Michael Yon:

I am in Basra, with our British Coalition partners, who this week launched a clever operation that lured enemy fighters into combat, a decision that proved fatal for more than two dozen of militia members and terrorists. Please click the link to read about Operation Arezzo. [http://www.michaelyon-online.com/wp/british-forces-at-war-as-witnessed-by-an-american.htm]

New readers will find the dispatch Tabula Rasa [http://www.michaelyon-online.com/wp/tabula-rasa.htm] gives context to my work from Iraq.

Another dispatch, with more than 100 photos of the 1-4 Cav at work in Baghdad, is nearly ready. What an excellent bunch of soldiers! I'll send out an announcement when "Desires of the Human Heart" is published and folks at home can see and read about things rarely reported.

I am energized by this embed with British soldiers, which has me in the thick of things with their soldiers who are engaged with the enemy. I broke yet another lens in combat with the British on Tuesday.
Before it got smashed, the lens was taking great photos, some of which you'll see in the latest dispatch, and others will be published in the coming days.
This site is wholly contingent on reader support, for which I'm truly grateful. In addition to keeping me in camera lenses, reader support is the best indication I have of how important it is for me to continue this work.

Respectfully,

Michael
http://www.michaelyon-online.com/
~~~~~
Go to http://www.pandora.com/ and search for “Pocket Full of Rocks”
~~~~~
You will soon be able to pay for onboard Amtrak food and beverage purchases with the swipe of a credit card.
~~~~~
Back in September of 2005, on the first day of school, Martha Cothren, a social studies school teacher at Robinson High School in Little Rock, did something not to be forgotten. On the first day of school, with permission of the school superintendent, the principal and the building supervisor, she took all of the desks out of the classroom.

The kids came into first period, they walked in, there were no desks...
They obviously looked around and said,
"Ms. Cothren, where's our desk?" And she said, "You can't have a desk until you tell me how you earn them."

They thought, "Well, maybe it's our grades."

"No," she said.

"Maybe it's our behavior."

And she told them, "No, it's not even your behavior."

And so they came and went in the first period, still no desks in the classroom. Second period, same thing, third period. By early afternoon television news crews had gathered in Ms. Cothren's class to find out about this crazy teacher who had taken all the desks out of the classroom. The last period of the day, Martha Cothren gathered her class. They were at this time sitting on the floor around the sides of the room. And she says, "Throughout the day no one has really understood how you earn the desks that sit in this classroom ordinarily." She said, "Now I'm going to tell you."

Martha Cothren went over to the door of her classroom and opened it, and as she did 27 U.S. veterans, wearing their uniforms, walked into that classroom, each one carrying a school desk. And they placed those school desks in rows, and then they stood along the wall. And by the time they had finished placing those desks, those kids for the first time I think perhaps in their lives understood how they earned those desks.

Martha said, "You don't have to earn those desks. These guys did it for you. They put them out there for you, but it's up to you to sit here responsibly to learn, to be good students and good citizens, because they paid a price for you to have that desk, and don't ever forget it."

My friend, I think sometimes we forget that the freedoms that we have are freedoms not because of celebrities. The freedoms are because of ordinary people who did extraordinary things, who loved this country more than life itself, and who not only earned a school desk for a kid at the Robinson High School in Little Rock, but who earned a seat for you and me to enjoy this great land we call home, this wonderful nation that we better love enough to protect and preserve with the kind of conservative, solid values and principles that made us a great nation.

"We live in the Land of the Free because of the brave"

Remember our Troops...

Thanks to Jeanette Ford
~~~~~
The photos on the front of this week’s “Bleat” include The Dream Center Easter Egg Hunt
~~~~~
Don’t forget to check out www.mcc2000.net
~~~~~
We’ve now got several addresses on the web for "Da Bleat." For the latest issue, go to http://www.bugsbleat.blogspot.com
Our photos are posted at http://www.bugsbleatphotos.blogspot.com.
~~~~~
Feel free to share the "Bleat" with any and all. That's why we publish it.
~~~~~
www.aaa.com Regular
Current Avg. $ 2.69
http://www.fuelgaugereport.com/
Albemarle Employee’s pump $2.55
~~~~~
Recipe(s) of the week - Mixed Greens with Tomato-Ginger Dressing Copyright, 2005, Robin Miller, All rights reserved Show: Quick Fix Meals with Robin Miller Episode: To Your Health


1 large plum tomato, seeds squeezed out, roughly chopped
1/4 cup chopped oil-packed sun-dried tomatoes
1 tablespoon minced fresh ginger
2 garlic cloves, peeled
1 to 2 tablespoons balsamic vinegar
½ cup water
1/4 teaspoon salt
1/4 teaspoon ground black pepper
6 cups washed mixed greens (any combination of romaine, red leaf, Bibb, Boston lettuce, mustard greens, spinach)


In a blender, combine tomato, sun-dried tomatoes, ginger, garlic, and vinegar. Process until finely chopped. Add water, salt, and pepper and puree until smooth.
Divide greens evenly among 4 salad plates and spoon dressing over top.


Nutrition Information
Nutritional Analysis Per Serving Calories 38
Total fat 1g Saturated fat 0g
Cholesterol 0mg Sodium 173mg
Carbohydrates 6g Protein 1.5g
Fiber 2.5g

~~~~~
If you've purchased select energy-saving items, such as ENERGY STAR-qualified doors, windows, skylights and fiberglass insulation, you may be eligible to claim a tax credit of up to $500 on your tax returns. You can even use that money to purchase another qualified product, and claim it on your taxes next year. And you will be saving money on your monthly energy bills throughout the year. - - http://www.lowes.com/lowes/lkn?action=pg&p=Promos/tax_credit.html&link=tax&campid=LWS_ESAPR_041007&email=kc5hii@magnolia-net.com&source=email
~~~~~
Check out www.journeyfellowshipchurch.com , and go to the Pastor's page on the lower lefthand corner.
Or go to www.dougmcallister.com . There's a page on church planting with Jimmy on it.
~~~~~
MapQuest Gas Prices, Pretty Cool http://gasprices.mapquest.com
~~~~~
If you’d like to write Dr. Antoon, he’d like to hear from you. This is his current address, the latest of the three federal prison’s he’s been in.
Patrick Antoon #06669-010
Federal Prison Camp-La Tuna
P. O. Box 8000
Anthony, NM/TX 88021

~~~~~
BreakPoint
With Chuck Colson

Are Christians Terrorists?
By Mark Earley
4/13/2007

What Schools Are Teaching Our Kids

Note: This commentary was delivered by Prison Fellowship President Mark Earley.

Two-and-a-half years ago, Islamic terrorists took 1,200 people hostage at a school in the Russian city of Beslan. They ultimately slaughtered 344 people, including 186 children. The attack brought back memories of the 1999 massacre at Columbine High School, in which two disaffected students shot to death twelve classmates and a teacher.

It is no surprise, then—especially after September 11—that a New Jersey school district felt the need to practice anti-terrorism drills. What shocked students was who the mock terrorists were supposed to be: homeschooling Christian fundamentalists.

It’s another example of how openly those hostile to any forms of Christianity express their contempt.

The anti-terrorism drill was organized by the Burlington Township Police Department. According to the Burlington County Times, the drill scenario described intruders as “members of a right-wing fundamentalist group called the ‘New Crusaders’ who do not believe in separation of church and state.” The storyline also says the mock terrorists were angry because the daughter of one gunman was expelled from school for praying in class. The drill “specified that two armed men invade the high school . . . shoot several students in the hallways, then barricade themselves in the media center with 10 student hostages.”

Not surprisingly, Christian students, parents, and local pastors were upset about Christians being portrayed this way, and conservative media outlets expressed outrage. In response, Burlington township and school officials claimed the scenario was “generic” and did not specify any particular religion.

Oh, please. This is like garbing the police in Arab headdresses, naming them the “New Jihadists,” and then claiming the scenario had nothing to do with Islam.

Nor is this the first time schools have run drills featuring Christian terrorists. Three years ago, a school district in Muskegon County, Michigan, had a similar drill. The terrorists in that case were called “Wackos Against Schools and Education”—homeschooling nuts who detonate a bomb on a school bus.

These drills are more than troubling. They deliberately ignore reality: The killers who have struck at schools—or who attempt to—are either Islamic radicals or disturbed students who are angry at other students or teachers.

Ironically, school districts probably stick the terrorism label on Christians in part because they are too afraid of what Islamic radicals may do if they dare suggest that Muslims might actually be the ones they have to worry about.

These drills are also disturbing in that they are giving impressionable kids an ugly and distorted picture of Christian believers: that we are crazed killers who go after anyone who crosses us. While I suspect older kids will roll their eyes at this depiction, younger children may well absorb the message that Christians really are dangerous.

We ought to protest that message wherever we see it—especially when the mainstream media ignores it, as they have in this case. But we should also be proactive in terms of what message kids do absorb about our faith. We should reach out to local, unchurched kids, offering after-school tutoring, game and movie nights, and camping trips.

There is nothing like knowing a few real followers of Jesus for kids to realize that neighborhood Christians are not murderous wackos, but indeed are followers of the Prince of Peace.

Learn more about how you can purchase ReWired, the worldview curriculum for teens by BreakPoint and TeenMania.

For Further Reading and Information

David Levinsky, “Drill Angers Conservatives,” Burlington County Times, 5 April 2007.

Jim Brown, “Hostage Drill at NJ School Features Mock ‘Christian Terrorists’,” One News Now, 2 April 2007.

Terry Mattingly, “Strange Stories from the World of Religion,” Scripps News, 11 April 2007.

Terry Mattingly, “Generic Fundamentalists Attack Church-State Wall!” Get Religion, 6 April 2007.

John Sanders, “The Christians Are Coming! The Christians Are Coming!” Townhall.com, 5 April 2007.

Jennifer Mesko, “N.J. Drill Casts Christians as Terrorists,” Citizenlink, 4 April 2007.

BreakPoint Commentary No. 060920, “Unleashing the Dogs: Why Are Christians Being Attacked?”

BreakPoint Commentary No. 040913, “Part of a Pattern: Beslan and Beyond.”

The BreakPoint Web site and BreakPoint WorldView Magazine feature Colson’s commentaries as well as feature articles by other established and up-and-coming writers to equip readers with a biblical perspective on a variety of issues and topics.
© 2004-2006 Prison Fellowship
~~~~~

Words of the Week:
toper: a drunkard; a sot.
obviate: to anticipate and dispose of or make unnecessary.
abecedarian: pertaining to the alphabet; also, rudimentary; also, a beginner.
rivulet: a small stream or brook.
putsch: an attempt to overthrow a government.
brio: vigor; vivacity.
spoonerism: the transposition of usually initial sounds in a pair of words.

from Dictionary.Com
~~~~~
"Books are the carriers of civilization. Without books, history is silent, literature dumb, science crippled, thought and speculation at a standstill." - Barbara Tuchman

"Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work." - Thomas Edison

"Kindness is not without its rocks ahead. People are apt to put it down to an easy temper and seldom recognize it as the secret striving of a generous nature; whilst, on the other hand, the ill-natured get credit for all the evil they refrain from." - Honore De Balzac

"The power of accurate observation is commonly called cynicism by those who have not got it." - George Bernard Shaw

"The chains of habit are generally too small to be felt until they are too strong to be broken." - Samuel Johnson

"Ask yourself whether you are happy, and you cease to be so. The only chance is to treat, not happiness, but some end external to it, as the purpose of life." - John Stuart Mill

"Without heroes, we are all plain people, and don't know how far we can go." - Bernard Malamud
~~~~~
BREAKING CHRISTIAN NEWS
http://breakingchristiannews.com/

# UK Mom Pulls Toddler Boys from Car Just Before it Plunges Off a Cliff
# Rutgers Women Show Grace to Imus
# President Bush Applauds Those Who Uphold Life
# Idaho Law Gives Abortion-Minded Women More Information

# Canadians Issue World Apology for Social Engineering Legislation
# Judge Rules that Texas Children's Hospital Keep 17-Month-Old Alive until Next Court Date
# Statement by President Bush on Stem Cell Bill Veto
# Supposed "Jesus Tomb" Scholars Now Backpedaling on Claims

# Record Church Attendance a Sign of "Cultural Shift" in Australia
# Bush Administration Draws Heavily From Christian Law School
# Parents Bring Pressure to Bear on MPAA to Revise Ratings Standards on Films
# Poll Shows Favorite Bible Verse of British

# Appeals Court to Hear Groundbreaking Argument on Whether Abortion Ends "Human Life"
# Popular TV Drama Depicts Real-Life Contact between Surgeon and Unborn Baby
# Jewish Congregation Offers Use of Their Facility for Christians on Easter Sunday
# American Family Association is Honoring "Welcome Home a Hero" member, Bert Brady

# Prayer Alert: Toddler Struggles for Life in Texas Hospital that Wants to Cut off Care
# New Book Chronicles Einstein's Life...and Belief in God
# Beloved Comic Strip Creator, Johnny Hart, Goes Home to the Lord
# 102-Year-Old Woman Scores a Hole-in-One and Sets World Record

# President Bush's Easter Message: "Give Thanks to the Almighty for the Glory of His Grace"
# A Cup of Suffering and Joy—a Word from Heidi Baker of Iris Ministries
# Australian Church Leaders Prepare Easter Messages: Resurrection, Peace, Truth
# Major League Baseball Greats Kick-Off New Season with Film about Faith on the Diamond—Mike Piazza Shares His Reaction

# Israeli Families of MIAs Write Open Letter to Families and Friends of Released British Hostages—UK Reunion brings Them Hope
# North Carolina Senate Apologizes for Slavery
# Australian Church Leaders Prepare Easter Messages: Resurrection, Peace, Truth
# Major League Baseball Greats Kick-Off New Season with Film about Faith on the Diamond—Mike Piazza Shares His Reaction

Breaking Christian News
310 2nd Ave SE
Albany, Oregon 97321
541-928-2642
E-mail
US Orders: 1-866-358-7426

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GCF: The Cantor

Emailed to me by a friend (Thanks, Edward) -Tom

If this was forwarded to you, please consider your own subscription to Good Clean Fun. It's free! A smile will enhance the quality of your life. SUBSCRIBE and UNSUBSCRIBE INFO for Good Clean Fun is at the end of this email. This email was scanned by Norton AntiVirus before it was sent.
---------------------------------------------------

A cantor, the man who sings the prayers at a synagogue, brags before his congregation in a booming, bellowing voice: "Two years ago I insured my voice with Lloyds of London for $750,000."

There is a hushed and awed silence in the crowded room. Suddenly, from the back of the room, the quiet, nasal voice of an elderly woman is heard, "So what did you do with the money?"
_ ____________________________ _

GCF: Lumberjack Wanted

Emailed to me by a friend (Thanks, David) -Tom
---------------------------------------------------

A large, well-established, Canadian lumber camp advertised that they were looking for a good lumberjack.

The very next day, a skinny little man showed up at the camp with his axe, and knocked on the head lumberjack's door. The head lumberjack took one look at the little man and told him to leave.

"Just give me a chance to show you what I can do," said the skinny man.

"Okay, see that giant redwood over there?" said the lumberjack.

"Take your axe and go cut it down."

The skinny man headed for the tree, and in five minutes he was back knocking on the lumberjack's door. "I cut the tree down," said the man.

The lumberjack couldn't believe his eyes and said, "Where did you get the skill to chop down trees like that?"

"In the Sahara Forest," replied the puny man.

"You mean the Sahara Desert," said the lumberjack.

The little man laughed and answered back, "Oh sure, that's what they call it now!"
_ ____________________________ _

GCF: Leaning Slightly

Emailed to me by a friend (Thanks, Lloyd) -Tom
---------------------------------------------------

I have this friend who always seemed to lean slightly to the left all the time.

It used to bother me, so I suggested he see a doctor, and have his legs checked out. For years, he refused ... told me I was crazy.

But last week, he finally went, and sure enough, the doctor discovered his left leg was 1/4 inch shorter than his right.

A quick bit of orthopedic surgery later, he was cured, and both legs are exactly the same length now, and he no longer leans.

"So," I said, "You didn't believe me when I told you a doctor could fix your leg."

He just looked at me and said, ... "I stand corrected."
_ ____________________________ _

GCF: Department Baseball

Emailed to me another humor list (Pastor Tim's Clean Laugh List) -Tom Subscribe to Pastor Tim's Clean Laugh list at the website: Subscribe
---------------------------------------------------

An interoffice softball game was held every year between the marketing department and the support staff of one company.

The support staff whipped the marketing department soundly.

To show just "how" the marketing department earns their keep, they posted this memo on the bulletin board after the game:

"The Marketing Department is pleased to announce that for the 2006 Softball Season, we came in 2nd place, having lost but one game all year. The Support Department, however, had a rather dismal season, as they won only one game."
_ ____________________________ _

GCF: Washington DC

Emailed to me by a friend (Thanks, Becky) -Tom
---------------------------------------------------

A teacher asked one of her pupils, "What's the nation's capital?"

The reply was, "Washington D.C."

On being asked what the 'D.C.' stood for, the pupil added, "Dot com!"
_ ____________________________ _
(((\ \>|_/ )_______________________( \_| \\\\ \_/ / Women will never be equal to \ \_/ ////
\ / men until they can walk down the\ /
\ _/ street with a bald head & a beer \_ /
/ / gut, & still think they are beautiful.\ \
(((\ \>|_/ )_______________________( \_| \\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ ////
\ / Did you know that \ /
\ _/ "verb" is a noun? \_ /
/ / \ \
(((\ \>|_/ )_______________________( \_| \\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ ////
\ / The only thing so simple \ /
\ _/ that a child can operate it \_ /
/ / is a grandparent. \ \
(((\ \>|_/ )_______________________( \_| \\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ ////
\ / Climate is what you expect. \ /
\ _/ Weather is what you get. \_ /
/ / \ \
(((\ \>|_/ )_______________________( \_| \\\\ \_/ / "I wish there was a knob \ \_/ ////
\ / on the TV to turn up the \ /
\ _/ intelligence. There's a knob \_ /
/ / called 'brightness' but it \ \
doesn't work." - Gallagher
_ ____________________________ _
| Thomas S. Ellsworth |
| tellswor@slonet.org |
| http://www.slonet.org/~tellswor |
|___________________________|
Stop for a visit, leave with a smile! To join Good Clean Fun, email: good-clean-fun-subscribe@yahoogroups.Com To leave Good Clean Fun, email: good-clean-fun-unsubscribe@yahoogroups.Com Or visit the Good Clean Fun web site at http://www. slonet.org/~tellswor/
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[GCFL.net] Dear Abby 03/15/07

/* We normally do not do surveys but we feel this matter is important enough to bend that rule. The Committee to Investigate Printing Sabotage (CIPS) has requested our assistance. They say, "The thousands of readers of GCFL, the worldwide range of the group, and the well known fact that GCFL members are of much higher than average intelligence make them uniquely qualified to perform this survey." We couldn't agree more!

We've setup our branch of the survey on our web page at http://gcfl.net/cips.php . There are only six fields to fill in, so it will only take a minute or two. Please help CIPS in this effort. We will post the results from GCFL members in Monday's mailing. Thanks! */

Dear Abby by Abigail Van Buren
03/15/07

NAME GAME GIVES PLEASURE TO THOSE WITH EAR FOR IRONY

DEAR ABBY: I have enjoyed the columns you've printed about people whose names matched their professions, and wonder if you would be interested in an incident that happened to my sister. Her name is Dragony, and she works in a pharmacy located in a medical building. Her license plate reads DRAGONY. Well, someone went into the pharmacy and asked the girl at the counter, "Who is Dr. Agony?" I still laugh when I think about it. -- KATHI IN CALIFORNIA

DEAR KATHI: Funny! Your sister's license plate reminds me of one that belongs to my neighbor, who happens to be an anesthesiologist. Her license plate reads: EPIDURL.

I am still hearing from readers offering names -- and some of them are a hoot. Read on:

DEAR ABBY: Years ago, I was office manager for a printing company that did work for the American Tobacco Co. in North Carolina. The purchasing agent's assistant there was a woman by the name of Flicka Ashe. Can you believe it! -- DOLORES IN SPARTANBURG, S.C.

DEAR ABBY: I have sold real estate for 18 years, and no one ever forgets my name. It's ... BETH NEWHOUSE, MAYVILLE, N.Y.

DEAR ABBY: My grandma fell and broke her hip last summer and had to have surgery. Her surgeon? Dr. Mark Cutright! -- KATHY IN TENNESSEE

DEAR ABBY: Shame on you! How could you forget your fellow member of the Group for Advancement of Psychiatry -- Dr. John Looney? -- FRANCES ROTON BELL, DALLAS

DEAR ABBY: Here's an item that might qualify. It's from the Jan. 16 edition of our local newspaper: "Charles T. Sprinkle, 27, of Sandpoint was cited on a charge of urinating in public at 11:52 p.m. in the 200 block of Main Street." -- LARRY S. IN IDAHO

DEAR ABBY: Would you like more names that match? My optician was named Ralph Glance, my daughter's allergist was Dr. Eitches, and my children's dentist is Dr. Spitz. -- SUSAN K., HAYWARD, CALIF.

DEAR ABBY: When I was in high school, there was a family with the last name "Braa." Guess what the mom's first name was? "Iona"! My initials are "B.S.," but this story is not. -- B.S., FARIBAULT, MINN.

DEAR ABBY: When my sister and I were children, we'd play a game called "I Spy" during road trips from Georgia to Alabama. On one of them we spotted a septic tank installation and maintenance company named "Seth Poole and Sons." -- LARRY IN DOERUN, GA.

DEAR ABBY: I used to work with a young woman named Linda Snow. She met and married a wonderful man. When she did, she became Mrs. Snow-White! -- A FAN, SUN CITY, ARIZ.

DEAR ABBY: My salesman husband was dealing with a particularly difficult client who demanded to speak to the boss. The reply: "I'll be happy to transfer you to him. His name is Robin Hood; if he isn't in, you can speak with his secretary -- Marian!" True story, real people. -- JENNIFER IN HOUSTON

DEAR ABBY: This isn't occupation-related, but I thought you might get a kick out of it anyway. I went to school with twins Esther and Lester Chester and their big brother, Chester Chester Jr. And no, I'm not kidding. -- L. LEGGETT, MAGNOLIA, MISS.

Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Write Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.

COPYRIGHT 2007 UNIVERSAL PRESS SYNDICATE

Received from Milton Freund.

(-:][:-)

[GCFL.net] Devil in the Church

One Sunday morning, everyone in a bright, beautiful, tiny town got up early and went to the local church. Before the services started, the townspeople were sitting in their pews and talking about their lives, their families, etc.

Suddenly, Satan appeared at the front of the church. Everyone started screaming and running for the front entrance, trampling each other in a frantic effort to get away from evil incarnate.

Soon everyone was evacuated from the church, except for one elderly gentleman who sat calmly in his pew, not moving, seemingly oblivious to the fact that God's ultimate enemy was in his presence. Now this confused Satan a bit, so he walked up to the man and said, "Don't you know who I am?"

The man replied, "Yep, sure do."

Satan asked, "Aren't you afraid of me?"

"Nope, sure ain't," said the man.

Satan was a little perturbed at this and queried, "Why aren't you afraid of me?"

The man calmly replied, "Been married to your sister for over 48 years."

Received from Milton Freund.

(-:][:-)

[GCFL.net] Kid Wisdom

Kid Wisdom

When your dad is mad and asks you, "Do I look stupid?" don't answer.

Never tell your mom her diet's not working.

Stay away from prunes.

Don't pull your dad's finger when he tells you to.

Never leave your three-year-old brother in the same room as your school assignment.

If you want a kitten, start out by asking for a horse.

Felt-tip markers are not good to use as lipstick.

Don't pick on your sister when she's holding a baseball bat.

When you get a bad grade in school, show it to your mom when she's on the phone.

Received from Pastor Tim.

(-:][:-)

[GCFL.net] Sign Language for Your Dentist

You know how hard it is to talk to your dentist when your teeth are being cleaned or you are getting a filling? Well, I decided I would make up a sort of sign language that you could use to express yourself without having to mumble.

Below are 10 common things you might wish to say, numbered 1-10. These would be printed on a poster and mounted on the ceiling above the dentist chair.

It would give you something to read since procedures can be boring. When a phrase seems appropriate, you would just hold up the corresponding number of fingers to express yourself.
The dentist would not need to stop to ask you to repeat yourself and could fix the problem right away.

1. Everything is fine, but my nose itches.

2. When you get a chance, there seems to be spit running down my neck.

3. So, I guess you had garlic again for lunch today?

4. You realize that wasn't my tooth that you just poked with that incredibly sharp tool of yours.

5. I would REALLY prefer you didn't do that again.

6. Could you please suction the chunk of debris that you missed before I gag?

7. Remember how I said I was numb? I think I may have been mistaken.

8. Wait a minute -- maybe I am allergic to latex.

9. Just so you know, if I don't get to take a break soon, I may bite you.

10. Please stop asking me stupid questions about myself or I will take that paper mask off your face.

Received from Valerie Goldston.

(-:][:-)

[GCFL.net] Kennedy Airport Flight

A plane was taking off from Kennedy Airport. After it reached a comfortable cruising altitude, the captain made an announcement over the intercom: "Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking. Welcome to Flight Number 293, nonstop from New York to Los Angeles. The weather ahead is good, so we should have a smooth and uneventful flight. Now sit back and relax... OH, MY NO!"

Silence followed, and after a few minutes, the captain came back on the intercom and said, "Ladies and Gentlemen, I am so sorry if I scared you earlier. While I was talking to you, the flight attendant accidentally spilled a cup of hot coffee in my lap. You should see the front of my pants!"

A passenger in coach yelled, "That's nothing. You should see the back of mine!"

Received from Chris Keniston.

(-:][:-)

-=+=-
Rate this funny at http://www.gcfl.net/archive.php?funny=20060113
Brought to you by GCFL.net: The Good, Clean Funnies List A cheerful heart is good medicine... (Prov 17:22a) Mail address: GCFL, Box 100, Harvest, AL 35749, USA
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Big Trouble

Two little boys, ages 10 and 8, were excessively mischievous. They were always getting into trouble and their parents knew all about it.

If any mischief occurred in their town, the two boys were probably involved.
The boys' mother heard that a preacher in town had been successful in discipling children, so she asked if he would speak with her boys.
The preacher agreed, but he asked to see them individually.
So the mother sent the 8 year old first, in the morning, with the older boy to see the preacher in the afternoon.
The preacher, a huge man with a booming voice, sat the younger boy down and asked him sternly, "Do you know where God is, son?"
The boy's mouth dropped open, but he made no response, sitting there wide-eyed with his mouth hanging open.
So the preacher repeated the question in an even sterner tone, "Where is God?!"
Again, the boy made no attempt to answer.

The preacher raised his voice even more and shook his finger in the boy's face and bellowed, "Where is God?!"

The boy screamed and bolted from the room, ran directly home and dove into his closet, slamming the door behind him.
When his older brother found him in the closet, he asked,

"What happened?"

The younger brother, gasping for breath, replied, "We are in BIG trouble this time.....
"GOD is missing, and they think we did it!"

Thanks to Jeanette Ford
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1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.
"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning."

2. My mother taught me RELIGION.
"You better pray that will come out of the carpet."

3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next
week!"

4. My mother taught me LOGIC.
" Because I said so, that's why."

5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC.
"If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the
store with me."

6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."

7. My mother taught me IRONY.
"Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about."

8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.
"Shut your mouth and eat your supper."

9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.
"Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!"

10. My mother taught me about STAMINA.
"You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."

11. My mother taught me about WEATHER.
"This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."

12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
"If I told you once, I've told you a million times.
Don't exaggerate!"

13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
"I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."

14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.
"Stop acting like your father!"

15. My mother taught me about ENVY.
"There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do."

16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION.
"Just wait until we get home."

17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING.
"You are going to get it when you get home!"

18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.
"If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to get stuck that way."

19. My mother taught me ESP.
"Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?"

20. My mother taught me HUMOR.
"When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me."

21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.
"If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."

22. My mother taught me GENETICS.
"You're just like your father."

23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS.
"Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?"

24. My mother taught me WISDOM.
"When you get to be my age, you'll understand."

25. And my favorite: My mother taught me about JUSTICE.
"One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you."

Thanks to Jim Bussey
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NEVER HEARD CREATION EXPLAINED THIS WAY BEFORE !!!

In the beginning, God created the Heavens and the Earth and populated the Earth with broccoli, cauliflower and spinach, green and yellow and red vegetables of all kinds, so Man and Woman would live long and healthy lives.
Then using God's great gifts, Satan created Ben and Jerry's Ice Cream and Krispy Creme Donuts. And Satan said, "You want chocolate with that?"
And Man said, "Yes!" and Woman said, "and as long as you're at it, add some sprinkles." And they gained 10 pounds. And Satan smiled. And God created the healthful yogurt that Woman might keep the figure that Man found so fair. And Satan brought forth white flour from the wheat, and sugar from the cane and combined them. And Woman went from size 6 to size 14.
So God said, "Try my fresh green salad." And Satan presented Thousand-Island Dressing, buttery croutons and garlic toast on the side. And Man and Woman unfastened their belts following the repast.
God then said, "I have sent you heart healthy vegetables and olive oil in which to cook them." And Satan brought forth deep fried fish and chicken-fried steak so big it needed its own platter. And Man gained more weight and his cholesterol went through the roof.
God then created a light, fluffy white cake, named it "Angel Food Cake," and said, "It is good." Satan then created chocolate cake and named it "Devil's Food."
God then brought forth running shoes so that His children might lose those extra pounds. And Satan gave cable TV with a remote control so Man would not have to toil changing the channels. And Man and Woman laughed and cried before the flickering blue light and gained pounds.
Then God brought forth the potato, naturally low in fat and brimming with nutrition. And Satan peeled off the healthful skin and sliced the starchy center into chips and deep-fried them. And Man gained pounds.
God then gave lean beef so that Man might consume fewer calories and still satisfy his appetite. And Satan created McDonald's and its 99-cent double cheeseburger. Then said, "You want fries with that?" And Man replied, "Yes!
And super size them!" And Satan said, "It is good." And Man went into cardiac arrest.

God sighed and created quadruple bypass surgery.

Then Satan created HMOs.

Thanks to David Lamb
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A mom was concerned about her kindergarten son walking to school. He didn't want his mother to walk with him. She wanted to give him the feeling that he had some independence but yet know that he was safe.
So she had an idea of how to handle it. She asked a neighbor, Mrs. Goodness, if she would please follow him to school in the mornings, staying at a distance, so he probably wouldn't notice her.
Mrs. Goodness said that since she was up early with her toddler anyway it would be a good way for them to get some exercise as well, so she agreed.
The next school day, Mrs. Goodness and her little girl, Marcy, set out following behind Timmy as he walked to school with another neighbor boy he knew. She did this for the whole week.
As the boys walked and chatted, kicking stones and twigs, Timmy's little friend noticed the same lady was following them as she seemed to do every day all week. Finally he said to Timmy, "Have you noticed that lady following us to school all week? Do you know her?"
Timmy nonchalantly replied, "Yeah, I know who she is."
The friend said, "Well, who is she"?
"That's just Shirley Goodness", Timmy replied, "and her daughter Marcy".
"Shirley Goodness? Who the heck is she and why is she following us?"

"Well", Timmy explained, "every night my Mom makes me say the 23rd Psalm with my prayers, 'cuz she worries about me so much. And in the Psalm, it says, 'Shirley Goodness and Marcy shall follow me all the days of my life', so I guess I'll just have to get used to it"!

Thanks to Jeanette Ford
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YOUR AGE BY EATING OUT
Don't tell me your age; you probably would tell a falsehood anyway, but your waiter may know!

YOUR AGE BY DINER & RESTAURANT MATH

It takes less than a minute . Work this out as you read .
Be sure you don't read the bottom until you've worked it out!
This is not one of those waste of time things, it's fun.

1. First of all, pick the number of times a week that you would like to go out to eat. (more than once but less than 10)

2. Multiply this number by 2 (just to be bold)

3. Add 5

4. Multiply it by 50

5. If you have already had your birthday this year add 1757 .... If you haven't, ad d 1756.

6. Now subtract the four digit year that you were born.

You should have a three digit number

The first digit of this was your original number (I.e., how! Many times you want to go out to restaurants in a week.)

The next two numbers are YOUR AGE! (Oh YES, it is !!!!)

THIS IS THE ONLY YEAR (2007) IT WILL EVER WORK

Thanks to Jeanette Ford
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Welcome to You Make Me Laugh, a free newsletter from Crosswalk.com, the world's largest Christian website.

*Perfect Mate*

At a local coffee bar, a young woman was expounding on her idea of the perfect mate to some of her friends.

"The man I marry must be a shining light amongst company. He must be musical. Tell jokes. Sing. Entertain. And stay home at night!"

An old granny overheard and spoke up, "Girl, if that's all you want, get a TV!"

(-:][:-)

*Where's Mommy*

One evening after dinner, a five-year-old boy noticed that his mother had gone out and he asked his father, "Where did mommy go?"

In answer to his question, he was told, "Mommy is at a Tupperware party."

This explanation satisfied him for only a moment. Puzzled, he asked, "What's a Tupperware party, daddy?"

The man had always given his son honest answers, so he figured a simple explanation would be the best approach. "Well, son," he said, "at a Tupperware party, a bunch of ladies sit around and sell plastic bowls to each other."

He nodded, indicating that he understood this curious pastime...

Then he burst out into laughter, and said, "Come on, Dad! What is it really?"

(-:][:-)

*Distraught Senior*

A distraught senior citizen phoned her doctor's office.

"Is it true," she wanted to know, "that the medication you prescribed has to be taken for the rest of my life?"

"Yes, I'm afraid so," the doctor told her.

There was a moment of silence before the senior lady replied, "I'm wondering, then, just how serious is my condition. This prescription is marked 'NO REFILLS'."

(-:][:-)

*Walking Recovery*

An old fellow came into the hospital truly on death's door due to an infected gallbladder. The surgeon who removed the gallbladder was adamant that his patients be up and walking in the hall the day after surgery, to help prevent blood clots forming in the leg veins. The nurses walked the patient in the hall as ordered, and after the third day the nurse told how he complained bitterly each time they did. The surgeon told them to keep walking him.

After a week, the patient was ready to go. His family came to pick him up and thanked the surgeon profusely for what he had done for their father. The surgeon was pleased and appreciated the thanks, but told them that it was really a simple operation and we had been lucky to get him in time.

"But doctor, you don't understand," they said, "Dad hasn't walked in over a year!"

(-:][:-)

Eye Laugh

"Coneheads"
http://www.cybersalt.org/go.php?id=cw380

"Other Door"
http://www.cybersalt.org/go.php?id=cw381

"Bucket Load"
http://www.cybersalt.org/go.php?id=cw382

"Dog Face"
http://www.cybersalt.org/go.php?id=cw383

(-:][:-)

-=+=-
Daily devotionals are available at http://link.Crosswalk.Com/UM/T.asp?A1. 39. 17757. 1. 494611 You can access more information on Crosswalk's Fun page http://www.Crosswalk.Com/fun/! Crosswalk gives credit to the author of a joke when author is known. Feel free to send notification to admin@cybersalt.org in cases where credit has not been given to the author! -SUBSCRIPTION INFO- * Copyright2004 Crosswalk.Com, Inc. and its Content Providers. All rights reserved. Introducing www.Crossguide.Com Where Christians find Products, Services & Ministries.
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"Don't strive for recognition, but work for achievement." -- Vanessa Malone
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Madeleine Begun Kane Latest Columns - -
http://www.madkane.com
http://www.madkane.com/notable.html (Notables Weblog)
http://www.madkane.com/bush.html (Dubya's Dayly Diary)
Subscribe to MadKane Humor Newsletter (weekly) here:
http://www.madkane.com/email.html
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Like a lot of folks, I have a job. I work, they pay me.

I Pay my taxes and the government distributes my taxes as they see fit.

In order to get that paycheck. I am required to pass a random urine test, which I have no problem with.

What I do have a problem with is the distribution of my taxes to people Who don't have to pass a urine test.

Shouldn't one have to pass a urine test to get a welfare check, because I have to pass one to earn it for them?

Please understand, I have no problem with helping people get back on their feet. I do, on the other hand, have a problem with helping Someone stay seated. Could you imagine how much money the state Would save if people had to pass a urine test to get a public assistance Check?

Thanks to Jeanette Ford
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THE EMPTY EGG

Jeremy was born with a twisted body and a slow mind. At the age of 12 he was still in second grade, seemingly unable to learn. His teacher, Doris Miller, often became exasperated with him. He would squirm in his seat, drool, and make grunting noises. At other times, he spoke clearly and distinctly, as if a spot of light had penetrated the darkness of his brain.

Most of the time, however, Jeremy just irritated his teacher.

One day she called his parents and asked them to come in for a consultation. As the Forresters entered the empty classroom, Doris said to them, "Jeremy really belongs in a special school. It isn't fair to him to be with younger children who don't have learning problems. Why, there is a five year gap between his age and that of the other students."

Mrs. Forrester cried softly into a tissue, while her husband spoke. "Miss Miller," he said, "there is no school of that kind nearby. It would be a terrible shock for Jeremy if we had to take him out of this school. We know he really likes it here."

Doris sat for a long time after they had left, staring at the snow outside the window. Its coldness seemed to seep into her soul. She wanted to sympathize with the Forresters. After all, their only child had a terminal illness. But it wasn't fair to keep him in her class. She had 18 other youngsters to teach, and Jeremy was a distraction.

Furthermore, he would never learn to read and write. Why waste any more time trying?

As she pondered the situation, guilt washed over her. Here I am complaining when my problems are nothing compared to that poor family, she thought. Lord, please help me to be more patient with Jeremy. >From that day on, she tried hard to ignore Jeremy's noises and his blank stares. Then one day, he limped to her desk, dragging his bad leg behind him.

"I love you, Miss Miller," he exclaimed, loud enough for the whole class to hear. The other students snickered, and Doris' face turned red.

She stammered, "Wh-why that's very nice, Jeremy. N-now please, take your seat."

Spring came, and the children talked excitedly about the coming of Easter. Doris told them the story of Jesus, and then to emphasize the idea of new life springing forth, she gave each of the children a large plastic egg. "Now," she said to them, "I want you to take this home and bring it back tomorrow with something inside that shows new life. Do you understand?"

"Yes, Miss Miller," the children responded enthusiastically--all except for Jeremy. He listened intently; his eyes never left her face. He did not even make his usual noises. Had he understood what she said about Jesus' death and resurrection? Did he understand the assignment? Perhaps she should call his parents and explain the project to them.

That evening, Doris' kitchen sink stopped up. She called the landlord and waited an hour for him to come by and unclog it. After that, she still had to shop for groceries, iron a blouse, and prepare a vocabulary test for the next day. She completely forgot about phoning Jeremy's parents.

The next morning, 19 children came to school, laughing and talking as they placed their eggs in the large wicker basket on Miss Miller's desk. After they completed their math lesson, it was time to open the eggs. In the first egg, Doris found a flower. "Oh yes, a flower is certainly a sign of new life," she said. "When plants peek through the ground, we know that spring is here." A small girl in the first row waved her arm.

"That's my egg, Miss Miller," she called out. The next egg contained a plastic butterfly, which looked very real. Doris held it up. "We all know that a caterpillar changes and grows into a beautiful butterfly. Yes, that's new life, too."

Little Judy smiled proudly and said, "Miss Miller, that one is mine." Next, Doris found a rock with moss on it. She explained that moss, too, showed life. Billy spoke up from the back of the classroom, "My daddy helped me," he beamed.

Then Doris opened the fourth egg. She gasped. The egg was empty. Surely it must be Jeremy's she thought, and of course, he did not understand her instructions. If only she had not forgotten to phone his parents.

Because she did not want to embarrass him, she quietly set the egg aside and reached for another. Suddenly, Jeremy spoke up.

"Miss Miller, aren't you going to talk about my egg?"

Flustered, Doris replied, "But Jeremy, your egg is empty." He looked into her eyes and said softly, "Yes, but Jesus' tomb was empty, too."

Time stopped. When she could speak again, Doris asked him, "Do you know why the tomb was empty?"

"Oh, yes," Jeremy said, "Jesus was killed and put in there. Then His Father raised Him up."

The recess bell rang. While the children excitedly ran out to the school yard, Doris cried. The cold inside her melted completely away.

Three months later, Jeremy died. Those who paid their respects at the mortuary were surprised to see 19 eggs on top of his casket, all of them empty.

Thanks to Larry Barnes
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It is time to change from REDNECK humor to TRUE AMERICAN Humor!

Only it isn't seen as HUMOR, but the correct way to LIVE YOUR LIFE! If you
feel the same, pass this on to your True American friends. Y'all know who they are...

You might be a TRUE AMERICAN if: It never occurred to you to be offended by the phrase, "One nation, under God."

You might be a TRUE AMERICAN if: You've never protested about seeing the 10 Commandments posted in public places.

You might be a TRUE AMERICAN if: You still say "Christmas" instead of "Winter Festival."

You might be a TRUE AMERICAN if: You bow your head when someone prays.

You might be a TRUE AMERICAN if: You stand and place your hand over your heart when they play the National Anthem.

You might be a TRUE AMERICAN if: You treat Viet Nam vets with great respect, and always have.

You might be a TRUE AMERICAN if: You've never burned an American flag.

You might be a TRUE AMERICAN if: You know what you believe and you aren't afraid to say so, no matter who is listening.

You might be a TRUE AMERICAN if: You respect your elders and expect your kids to do the same.

You might be a TRUE AMERICAN if: You'd give your last dollar to a friend.
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This story is so moving....just one of the many poignant stories that have been told about the monster tornado that hit Enterprise on March 1, 2007. May God bless us all with a heart as full of humility and compassion as our President.......and........may God bless you.....President Bush.
Starr

For those of you from outside Alabama, the town of Enterprise was hit by a tornado on March 1, 2007 during daylight hours and the high school was destroyed; 8 students were killed... The following e-mail was written by a young lady (Tammy) from the Enterprise area to her friend Joey, who apparently shared his e-mail message with a friend named Tina. Tina shared the story with my daughter.

I thought you might want to read this - I'm reasonably sure we won't see it on the evening news.........
________________________

Tina
This e-mail was written by someone in Enterprise. She is relaying a message told by an ABI officer who attends Ridgecrest Baptist Church in Enterprise. The officer was with President Bush when he visited.
___________________________
Joey,
There is a man at Ridgecrest who is an ABI officer. He got up last night and told us about having the honor of being paired with one of the secret service men who were with President Bush Saturday in Enterprise. He said when they started walking through the rubble at the school they came upon four students waiting for the President. They were in an area where on the floor there was a emblem that read EHS Class of 65. When the President approached the students he asked which one of you is the president (I assume president of the student body)? One of the girls kind of raised her hand and said I am then she hung her head and started to cry. President Bush wrapped his arms around her and the other three joined them. Barry, the ABI officer said President Bush started to cry and said "It's tough being the president isn't it." Barry said he talked with them a little longer. He said he was very close to the President but couldn't hear every word that was spoken, but he could tell that the President was quoting scripture. After a while the President started walking again and said he wanted the emblem preserved whatever it took. The Mayor then spoke up and said they would take care of it and President Bush turned to him and said "I was speaking to the President." I bet that the Mayor closed his mouth then!!! and then President Bush said "by the way where are my children"? The four students who were lagging behind came running up to him and walked the rest of the way over to the church with him. The media were sent to a different area Barry said. When President Bush got inside the church to meet with the families of those that had been killed the secret serviceman turned to Barry and said this is as far as we go. This is his time with them. Barry then asked him if the President was protected and the secret servicemen said yes, he is protected, but not by us. Barry could hardly contain himself as he was telling us this last night. He said he told the secret service man that he wished everyone could witness what he just did then they could see that the most powerful man in the United States was just another human being, a father, a comforter, a friend and had true compassion for these people. However the media does not portrait that, big surprise! Of course I don't tell this story with the humility that Barry did because he was there, but I thought you might like to hear it. You might want to share it with Paul and Kim.

Thanks to Greg McDaniel
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Our Church, Magnolia Christian Center, has the following mission statement. Our purpose is to build a great church for the glory of God through the great commission and the great commandment. MCC' Vision - That MCC will be a place hopping with children, energized with teenagers, balanced with diversity and transformed by the power of God! We want to turn uninterested people into interested people and win the lost to make fully devoted followers of Christ. www.mcc2000.net
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TOURBUS - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -:) - :)- :)
Volume 12, Number 34 --- 10 Apr 2007
Tourbus Home -- http://www.InternetTourbus.com
------------------------------------------------------------

TODAY'S TOURBUS TOPICS: Hard Drive Failures / GRE Updates

Howdy, y'all, and greetings once again from deep behind the orange curtain in beautiful Irvine, California, where Novgorod forces led by Alexander Nevsky rebuffed an invasion attempt by the Teutonic Knights.

+---------------------------------------+

I apologize for my recent absence. Your fearless bus driver was busy cramming for the GRE and speaking at the Illinois Technology Conference for Educators, Northwest Council for Computer Education conference, and Michigan Association for Computer Users in Learning conference. Oh, and I went to Disneyland too. But I'm back. :)

--------------------------------------
What really causes hard drives to fail
Audience: Everyone
--------------------------------------

Conventional wisdom states that the more you use your hard drive -- or, for that matter, the hotter your hard drive gets -- the more likely it is to crash. That certainly sounds plausible, but is it true? According to Google, the answer is a resounding "NO!"

How would Google know? Well, remember that when you use Google to search the internet you aren't really searching the internet. You're searching Google's copy of the internet, the files that Google's spiders [a.k.a., "Googlebots"] find, vacuum up, and send back to the Google mother ship. To store all of this data, Google uses a gozillion hard drives [100,000 or more] in its data centers scattered around the world. And like any well-run data center, Google's data centers constantly monitor and record data on the health status of every hard drive.

Google employees Eduardo Pinheiro, Wolf-Dietrich Weber, and Luiz Andre Barroso gathered in-depth data from over 100,000 disk drives deployed throughout Google and discovered that

* Contrary to previously reported results, there is very little correlation between failure rates and either elevated temperature or activity levels.

* However, some SMART parameters (scan errors, reallocation counts, offline reallocation counts, and probational counts) have a HUGE impact on hard drive failure probability.

* Given the lack of occurrence of predictive SMART signals on a large fraction of failed drives, it is unlikely that an accurate predictive failure model can be built based on these signals alone.

Google's complete report, titled "Failure Trends in a Large Disk Drive Population", is a 241 KB, 13 page Adobe Acrobat file that you can download at

http://216.239.37.132/papers/disk_failures.pdf

The bad news is that this report reads a bit like stereo instructions. If you aren't a techie, skip the PDF and check out Gizmodo's or StorageMojo's summaries instead at

http://tinyurl.com/yw7db8
http://storagemojo.com/?p=378

Long story short: Most of what we know about hard drive failure rates and causes is wrong.

--------------------------------------------
Graduate Record Exams Updates
Audience: Educators and future grad students
--------------------------------------------

ETS canceled its plans to launch a revised Graduate Record Examinations (GRE) general test in September. This means that the current, 2.5 hour computer adaptive test format -- an argument essay, an issue essay, 30 verbal questions, and 28 quantitative questions -- will continue to be offered for the foreseeable future. You can read ETS' official announcement at

http://tinyurl.com/3yrqed

The GRE is commonly used for graduate school admissions in fields other than business [which uses the GMAT], law [which uses the LSAT], and medicine [which uses the MCAT]. ETS had planned to expand the GRE to a four hour test in September. The new test would have had two 40- minute verbal sections, two 40-minute quantitative sections, one experimental section, and two 30-minute analytical writing essays.
Ouch.

Talking about the GRE, in my December 5th post [which you can still find at http://tinyurl.com/36k7np ] I mentioned I was planning to take the GRE in the quixotic hope of getting into the Ed. D. program at USC. Well, I took the GRE in February and I am proud to announce that I scored a 1300 [660 verbal and 640 quantitative]. Despite my semi- weekly butchering of the English language in my Tourbus posts, my verbal score puts me in the 93rd percentile [only 7% of the test takers scored higher]. And credit for this score goes to fellow Tourbus riders Paul Kanarek and Drew Deutsch at the Princeton Review.
After reading my December 5th post, Kanarek and Deutsch let me test drive the Princeton Review's LiveOnline GRE test prep program at

http://tinyurl.com/38m5ex

LiveOnline offers 20-30 hours of interactive, self-paced online lessons and a mess of practice quizzes that help you prepare for almost anything the GRE will throw at you. Combine that with the Princeton Review's "Hit Parade" vocabulary list [which I wrote down on about 600 index cards], in-depth practice exercises, and the yummy pencil-shaped cookie you get for signing up, and you have a sure-fire way to boost your GRE score by several hundred points.

I'm not sure if my GRE score is high enough to get me into the USC Rossier School of Education's Ed. D. program -- this is, after all, *USC* -- but I owe Kanarek, Deutsch, and the rest of the folks at the Princeton Review a huge debt of gratitude.

+---------------------------------------+
Have a safe and happy week, and we'll talk again soon.
+---------------------------------------+

==[ Tourbus Rider Information ]==
The Internet Tourbus - U.S. Library of Congress ISSN #1094-2238
Copyright 1995-2007, Rankin & Crispen - All rights reserved
Be Smarter & Better Looking Than [-99.386579-] Percent of Users

The Best of Everything - http://www.InternetTourbus.com/best.html
Subscribe, Signoff, Archives, Free Stuff and More at the
Tourbus Home - http://www.InternetTourbus.com
========================
.~~~. ))
(\__/) .' ) )) Patrick Douglas Crispen
/o o \/ .~
{o_, \ { crispen@netsquirrel.com
/ , , ) \ http://www.netsquirrel.com/
`~ -' \ } )) AOL Instant Messenger: Squirrel2K
_( ( )_.'
---..{____} Warning: squirrels.
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Activities and Events of Interest

Albemarle Employees and Contractors - Steak & Bingo Dinner
Saturday, April 14, at the Magnolia Junior High School Cafeteria from 6:00–9:00 p.m.
~~~
Saturday, April 21/2007 and Sunday, April 22/2007, Defenders of Liberty Barksdale AFB Air Show. Gates Open at 9:am Special Performances by... F-15E Strike Eagle Demo, U.S. Army Black Daggers, Air Force Reserve’s Ed Hamill, C-17 Globemaster III Demo, Shockwave, Gene Soucy & Teresa Stokes, Wyche Coleman, Bill Stein, C-130, A-10, B-2, F-117, Tora 101, MiG-17
http://www.barksdaleafbairshow.com/index.html
~~~
19th Annual Magnolia Blossom Festival & World Championship Steak Cook-Off
May 18 - May 19, 2007
~~~
The Emancipation Proclamation will be on display at the Clinton Library September 22-25, 2007.
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"September 11 WDYTJWD" W. P. Florence
Justice first, then peace."
"September 11" Never forget.--Tony Moses
"ONE NATION UNDER GOD ...the only way"--Phillip Story
"We have nothing to fear but fear itself." -- Franklin D. Roosevelt
"Keeping my head down but face toward Heaven" - - Jody Eldred, ABC News Cameraman in Kuwait
"Remember Pearl Harbor? Remember 9/11!" --"Bug"
Tell the people you love that you love them, at every opportunity. - - George Carlin
"Stop telling God how big your storm is. Instead, tell the storm how big your God is!" - - Queen E. Watson
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Weekly Toll - - http://weeklytoll.blogspot.com/
Death In The Workplace w/News & Updates
John Donne - ...any man's death diminishes me, because I am involved in mankind, and therefore never send to know for whom the bell tolls; it tolls for thee.
A partial list of workplace fatalities.

Worker Dies In Plant Accident
North Dakota - A Hatton, N.D., man was killed Tuesday morning when he got caught in sunflower seed cleaning equipment at a processing plant in the Traill County town, said Sheriff Mike Crocker.

Time Warner worker dies after fall from ladder
Michael Billings, 50, suffered head injuries upon striking the pavement of a parking lot in the 9400 block of Interstate 35, the report stated.

Worker dies after fall from transmission tower
HARRODSBURG, Ky. -- Timothy R. Barker, 42, of Morehead, fell 60 to 70 feet Tuesday,

Federal agency investigating fatal injury at glass business
PAYNE, Ohio - Amanda Moriah Eanes of Payne was carrying a large piece of glass with another female employee with it slipped out of Ms. Eanes' hand and struck her neck, causing severe bleeding,.

Two Vineyard Workers Found Dead
Breaking news today out of Santa Barbara County.
It appears that Regelio Ruiz Reyes, 25, and Ramon Cisneros Acosta, 42, a foreman with the winery for 10 years, drowned in an irrigation basin attempting to clean a filtration system.

Hardware manager is slain in Maywood; Man served on Police and Fire Commission
Jeffrey Lowenthal, 53, Bahcall's longtime store manager, was fatally shot in an apparent armed robbery attempt about 5:30 p.m. Monday

CRASH KILLS NEWSPAPER CARRIER
Roanoke, VA -- Virginia State Police said Robert Bowen's 2007 Ford Fusion hit a patch of ice on Jackson River Road about 3 a.m. Bowen was not wearing a seat belt.

Truck driver killed in crash on Route 581 ramp
Harrisburg, PA -- Gerald F. Keever, 59, of Boas Street, was ejected from the truck when it flipped around 9: 30 a.m.

Sports bar to raise money for slain security guard
LA MIRADA, CA -- Reyes Armando Garcia of Pico Rivera was shot just before 10:30 p.m. Friday by one of a group of people who were refused entry into the sports bar because of their gang attire.

Sawmill worker snagged by blade and killed
St. Louis, MO -- Jose Garcia, 31, of Park Hills, reached inside a large machine at the H & H Sawmill about 10 a.m. to try to keep a saw from jamming; the turning blade snagged his clothing and dragged him in.

Worker killed at Nashville waste water plant
NASHVILLE Tenn. -- Ezequiel Resendiz, 22, of Bonita Springs, Fla., was crushed when a backhoe operator pushed a box of construction materials against the wall at the Dry Creek Waste Water Plant.

Truck driver killed in rollover near Roundup
BILLINGS Mont.-- 77-year-old Jesse Lacock Jr., of Saco, was pinned inside the truck and died at the scene.

Trucker dies in fiery wreck
Kansas City, MO -- The truck driver (An Gang, 48) was killed in the crash, which occurred on northbound I-435 near the I-35 split.

Cabbie shot to death in robbery setup, charges say
Brooklyn, NY -- Green and White driver Jim Moody arrived with no idea that he had driven into a trap laid by two gunmen who wanted his money, authorities said.

Texan falls to his death at Port of Shreveport-Bossier
TX - Authorities said they were unsure how far Anthony Shands fell. The 72-year-old Gilmer resident had been connecting cables on the 150-foot tower

Wharton County game warden shot and killed in high speed chase Friday night
PIERCE, TX - Texas Parks and Wildlife Game Warden Justin Hurst, who would have turned 34 today, was shot and killed following a high-speed chase.

Electrical Worker Dies After Equipment Fell On Him
GREENWOOD, Ind. -- Christopher Hartsock was replacing a transformer in Greenwood when he was trapped underneath a piece of equipment that had fallen on him.

Engineering firm worker dies from fall off high-rise
FORT LAUDERDALE, Fla. - Ed Salvano, 57, was on the 14th floor of the Coral Ridge Towers East when his harness broke

Athens farm worker killed at crossing
AL - Gerald Dean Jernigan, 67, was using an Ag-Chem Terra-Gator to spread fertilizer on fields south of the railroad tracks at the time of the crash

Oil Field Worker Dies In Crash
NEOLA, UT - 29-year-old Thomas J. Starkey from Neola was heading toward Roosevelt on his way to work when he drifted off the road and crashed

Construction worker dies in trench collapse
CA - Daniel Contreras, 32, of Oxnard was standing in the 4-foot-deep trench about 8:50 a.m. when walls of loose dirt and shale fell in on him

Sheriff's deputy dies in car collision
CA - Deputy Manuel Villegas, 33, of Indio died at the scene

Roofer falls to his death after roof collapse
AL - Charles Michael Lammons, who was employed by Kiker Roofing & Sheet Metal Contractors of Mobile.

One dead, one injured in accident at mine
GLENFORD, OH — David Flowers, 44, of Somerset, died after some sort of mining accident

Fort Smith Police Officer Killed
AR - Thirty-three-year-old Officer Daniel C. Martinez was shot in the head last night and died later at a hospital.

Bridge worker dies in boating accident
PASS CHRISTIAN, MS — Steve Inscore, 47, of Wimberly, Texas, died in the Tuesday's crash, when the crewboat he was driving struck a barge just north of the construction site of the U.S. 90 bridge over the Bay of St. Louis.

Police ID Construction Worker Killed In Shooting
POMONA, Calif. - Carlos Edward Gonzalez, 18, of Huntington Park, was shot at Oak Street and Mission Boulevard

Construction accident leaves worker dead
LEXINGTON, SC – Pascual Francisco was declared dead at the scene of the accident,

Worker dies after falling
ROCK SPRINGS, MT - Leo Greyeyes, 49, of Kayenta, Ariz., fell Tuesday morning and died of head and chest trauma, according to Deputy County Coroner Travis Sanders.

OSHA probing worker’s fatal fall
NY - Jonathan Fundalinski died following a fall through an open stair shaft at the historic Webb Building at 92 Pearl St.

Store Manager Killed Trying To Stop Burglar
FORT LAUDERDALE, Fla. -- Mahmoud Mansour, tried to stop the man from escaping.

U.S. Forest Service officer killed in crash
BUCKLEY, Wash. – U.S. Forest Service Officer Shane Wyrsch was driving home on Highway 410 near Buckley Monday night when a pickup crossed the center line and slammed into him head-on.

Man Killed In Farming Accident
HENNESSEY, Okla. - Joe Charles Sedlak, 82, was found dead Monday evening about 10 miles east of Hennessey and three miles south of Oklahoma 51, officers said. He was apparently working the ground with the tractor when the accident happened.

Dallas officer dies in shootout
DALLAS, TX - Mark Timothy Nix, 33, who had been on the force nearly seven years, was declared dead at Parkland Memorial Hospital,

Man Dies After Fall Down Air Shaft

CLEVELAND, OH -- 28-year-old Jason Whitt was working on Thursday inside heating and cooling ducts when he fell four stories down a vertical shaft.

Police investigate death of construction worker
PLAINFIELD, Ill. - 49-year-old Karl Reed of Joliet was pronounced dead yesterday afternoon. Reed was struck by concrete that fell from a crane cable.

Second officer dies after Moncks Corner shooting
SC - 26-year-old Marcus Stiles died Monday morning. Forty-year-old Officer Lonnie Wells was killed Sunday afternoon.

Construction worker dies after falling from roof
GRAND RAPIDS TOWNSHIP, Mich. - Alvaro Mancera was pronounced dead today at a hospital in Grand Rapids.

Worker killed on job was everyone's favorite
MI - Don Witt always had a smile on his face and usually had a good joke to share. The 53-year-old Bailey man was the center of his family and a favorite of his co-workers. was killed Friday after the cap of a pressurized water pipe struck him in the chest

Fourth day on the job
AVALON, PA - A 35-year-old McKees Rocks-area man was killed Friday morning when he became trapped under a concrete slab Ivan Johnson died accidentally of asphyxiation from the barrier compressing his body.

Woodburn man dies in oil-tank explosion
OTHELLO, OR -- State and federal safety investigators identified the dead worker as Michael Taylor, 60, of Woodburn.

87-Year-Old Farmer Trampled To Death By His Cows
VERNAL, Utah - 87-year-old Cecil Holmes of Vernal died after two of the cows have calves and they become very protective and must have thought they were in danger.

Painter dies following industrial accident at UMass construction site
MA - Rejean Chicoine, 55, of Springfield was spray painting beams on a scissors aerial lift when he became lodged between a beam and the lift

OSHA launches investigation of fatal ADM plant accident
DECATUR, IL - Francisco Moreno Garcia, 26, suffered severe burns from steam. He had burns over 87 percent of his body

http://weeklytoll.blogspot.com/2007/04/weekly-toll-death-in-american-workplace.html
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NEVER FORGET! We're listing the names of our soldiers killed weekly. These records can be found at http://www.defenselink. mil/releases/

01. Sgt. Forrest D. Cauthorn, 22, of Midlothian, Va., died April 5 in Hawijah, Iraq, of wounds suffered when his unit came into contact with enemy forces using small arms and grenades during combat operations. His death is under investigation.
He was assigned to the 2nd Battalion, 27th Infantry Regiment, 3rd Brigade Combat Team, 25th Infantry Division, Schofield Barracks, Hawaii.

02. Spc. Jay S. Cajimat, 20, of Lahaina, Hawaii, died April 6 in Baghdad, Iraq, of wounds suffered when a vehicle-borne improvised explosive device detonated near his unit. He was assigned to the 2nd Battalion, 16th Infantry Regiment, 4th Infantry Brigade Combat Team, 1st Infantry Division, Fort Riley, Kan.

The Department of Defense announced the death of two soldiers who were supporting Operation Iraqi Freedom. The soldiers died from wounds suffered Apr. 4 in Taji, Iraq, when an improvised explosive device detonated near their vehicle. They were assigned to the 2nd Battalion, 8th Cavalry Regiment, 1st Brigade Combat Team, 1st Cavalry Division, Fort Hood, Texas. Killed were:
03. Staff Sgt. Jerry C. Burge, 39, of Carriere, Miss.
04. Cpl. Joseph H. Cantrell IV, 23, of Ashland, Ky.

The Department of Defense announced the death of two soldiers who were supporting Operation Iraqi Freedom. They died April 4 in Baghdad, Iraq, when an improvised explosive device detonated near their vehicle during combat operations. They were assigned to the 2nd Battalion, 12th Infantry Regiment, 2nd Brigade Combat Team, 2nd Infantry Division, Fort Carson, Colo. Killed were:
05. Spc. Walter Freeman Jr., 20, of Lancaster, Calif.
06. Pfc. Derek A. Gibson, 20, Eustis, Fla.

07. 1st Lt. Phillip I. Neel, 27, of Maryland, died April 8 in Balad, Iraq, of wounds suffered when his unit came in contact with enemy forces using grenades. His death is under investigation.
Neel was assigned to the 3rd Battalion, 8th Cavalry Regiment, 3rd Brigade, 1st Cavalry Division, Fort Hood, Texas.

08. Spc. Conor G. Masterson, 21, of Inver Grove Heights, Minn., died April 7 in Eastern Afghanistan of wounds suffered when an improvised explosive device detonated near his vehicle. Masterson was assigned to the 1st Battalion, 4th Infantry Regiment, Hohenfels, Germany.

The Department of Defense announced the death of three sailors who were supporting Operation Iraqi Freedom. They died April 6 from enemy action while conducting combat operations near Kirkuk, Iraq. Killed were:
09. Chief Petty Officer Gregory J. Billiter, 36, of Villa Hills, Ky.
10. Petty Officer 2nd Class Curtis R. Hall, 24, of Burley, Idaho.
11. Petty Officer 1st Class Joseph A. McSween, 26, of Valdosta, Ga.
All three sailors were assigned to Explosive Ordnance Disposal Unit Eleven, Whidbey Island, Wash.

The Department of Defense announced the death of three soldiers who were supporting Operation Iraqi Freedom. They died April 6 in Baghdad, Iraq, when an improvised explosive device detonated near their vehicle during combat operations. They were assigned to the 1st Battalion, 18th Infantry Regiment, 2nd Brigade Combat Team, 1st Infantry Division, Schweinfurt, Germany. Killed were:
12. Capt. Anthony Palermo, 26, of Brockton, Mass.
13. Spc. Ryan S. Dallam, 24, of Norman, Okla.
14. Pvt. Damian Lopez Rodriguez, Tucson, Ariz.

15. Sgt. Adam P. Kennedy, 25, of Norfolk, Mass., died April 8 in Diwaniyah, Iraq, of wounds suffered with his unit came in contact with enemy forces using indirect fire. Kennedy was assigned to the Headquarters and Headquarters Company, 4th Brigade Combat Team, 25th Infantry Division, Fort Richardson, Alaska.

16. Sgt. Todd A. Singleton, 24, of Muskegon, Mich., died April 8 in Baghdad, Iraq, of wounds suffered when his unit came in contact with enemy forces using an improvised explosive device and small arms fire. He was assigned to the 2nd Battalion, 5th Cavalry Regiment, 1st Brigade, 1st Cavalry Division, Fort Hood, Texas.

17. Cmdr. Philip A. Murphy-Sweet, 42, of Caldwell, Idaho, died April 7, as a result of enemy action in the vicinity of Baghdad. He was operationally assigned to Joint Contracting Command, Multi-National Force – Iraq and was deployed from his permanently assigned command of Naval Inventory Control Point, Mechanicsburg, Pa.

The Department of Defense announced today the death of two soldiers who were supporting Operation Iraqi Freedom. They died April 8 in Baghdad, Iraq, when their unit came in contact with enemy forces using an improvised explosive device and small arms fire. They were assigned to the 2nd Battalion, 69th Armor Regiment, 3rd Brigade Combat Team, 3rd Infantry Division, Fort Benning, Ga. Killed were:
18. Staff Sgt. Harrison Brown, 31, of Prichard, Ala.
19. Pfc. David N. Simmons, 20, of Kokomo, Ind.

The Department of Defense announced the death of four soldiers who were supporting Operation Iraqi Freedom. They died Apr. 7 in Zaganiyah, Iraq, when an improvised explosive device detonated near their unit. They were assigned to the 5th Squadron, 73rd Cavalry Regiment, 3rd Brigade Combat Team, 82nd Airborne Division, Fort Bragg, N.C. Killed were:
20. Capt. Jonathan D. Grassbaugh, 25, of East Hampstead, N.H.
21. Spc. Ebe F. Emolo, 33, of Greensboro, N.C.
22. Spc. Levi K. Hoover, 23, of Midland, Mich.
23. Pfc. Rodney L. McCandless, 21, of Camden, Ark.

24. Staff Sgt. Jesse L. Williams, 25, of Santa Rosa, Calif., died April 8 in Balad, Iraq, of wounds suffered from small arms fire while conducting combat operations in Baqubah, Iraq. Williams was assigned to the 5th Battalion, 20th Infantry Regiment, 3rd Brigade, 2nd Infantry Division (Stryker Brigade Combat Team), Fort Lewis, Wash.

25. Spc. Clifford A. Spohn III, 21, of Albuquerque, N.M., died Apr. 9 in Karmah, Iraq, of wounds suffered when the enemy attacked his location with indirect fire. Spohn was assigned to the 3rd Battalion, 509th Parachute Infantry Regiment, 4th Brigade Combat Team, 25th Infantry Division, Fort Richardson, Alaska.

26. Pfc. Kyle G. Bohrnsen, 22, of Philipsburg, Mont., died April 10 in Baghdad, Iraq, of wounds sustained when his vehicle hit an improvised explosive device. He was assigned to the 2nd Battalion, 12th Infantry Regiment, 2nd Brigade Combat Team, 2nd Infantry Division, Fort Carson, Colo.

27. Sgt. Raymond S. Sevaaetasi, 29, of Pago Pago, American Samoa, died April 11 in Baghdad, Iraq, of wounds suffered when his vehicle struck an improvised explosive device. He was assigned to the 15th Brigade Support Battalion, 2nd Brigade Combat Team, 1st Cavalry Division, Fort Hood, Texas.

28. Sgt. Raymond S. Sevaaetasi, 29, of Pago Pago, American Samoa, died April 11 in Baghdad, Iraq, of wounds suffered when his vehicle struck an improvised explosive device. He was assigned to the 15th Brigade Support Battalion, 2nd Brigade Combat Team, 1st Cavalry Division, Fort Hood, Texas.

The Department of Defense announced the death of three soldiers who were supporting Operation Iraqi Freedom. They died Apr. 9 in Baghdad, Iraq, when an improvised explosive device detonated near their vehicle. They were assigned to the 2nd Battalion, 17th Field Artillery Regiment, 2nd Brigade Combat Team, 2nd Infantry Division, Fort Carson, Colo. Killed were:
29. Spc. Ismael G. Solorio, 21, of San Luis, Ariz.
30. Pfc. Brian L. Holden, 20, of Claremont, N.C.
31. Pvt. Brett A. Walton, 37, of Hillsboro, Ore.

32. Cpl. Jason J. Beadles, 22, of La Porte, Ind., died April 12 in Baghdad, Iraq, of a non-combat related injury. The incident is under investigation. He was assigned to the 887th Engineer Company, 326th Engineer Battalion, 101st Airborne Division (Air Assault), Fort Campbell, Ky.
~~
Ten Missing WWII Airmen are Identified

The Department of Defense POW/Missing Personnel Office announced today that the remains of ten U.S. servicemen, missing in action from World War II, have been identified and will be returned to their families for burial with full military honors.

They are 2nd Lt. Raymond A. Cooley, of Leary, Texas; 2nd Lt. Dudley R. Ives, of Ingleside, Texas; 2nd Lt. George E. Archer, of Cushing, Okla.; 2nd Lt. Donald F. Grady, of Harrisburg, Pa.; Tech. Sgt. Richard R. Sargent, of North Girard, Pa.; Tech. Sgt. Steve Zayac, of Cleveland, Ohio; Staff Sgt. Joseph M. King, of Detroit, Mich.; Staff Sgt. Thomas G. Knight, of Brookfield, Ill.; Staff Sgt. Norman L. Nell, of Tarkio, Mo.; and Staff Sgt. Blair W. Smith, of Nu Mine, Pa.; all U.S. Army Air Forces. The dates and locations of the funerals are being set by their families.

Representatives from the Army met with the next-of-kin of these men in their hometowns to explain the recovery and identification process and to coordinate interment with military honors on behalf of the secretary of the Army.

On April 16, 1944, a B-24 Liberator crewed by these airmen was returning to the aerodrome at Nadzab, New Guinea, after bombing enemy targets near Hollandia. The aircraft was altering course due to bad weather and was proceeding to the aerodrome at Saidor, but it never returned to friendly lines.

In late 2001, the U.S. Embassy in Papua New Guinea notified the Joint POW/MIA Accounting Command that wreckage of a World War II bomber had been found in Morobe Province. Early the next year, a JPAC team surveyed the site and found aircraft wreckage and remains. They also collected more remains and Grady’s identification tag from local villagers who had found the items at the crash site.

Later in 2002, a JPAC team began excavating the crash site and recovered remains and crew-related items, including identification tags for Knight and Smith. The team was unable to complete the recovery, and another JPAC team re-visited the site two weeks later to complete the excavation. The team found additional remains and identification tags for Sargent and King.

Among dental records, other forensic identification tools and circumstantial evidence, scientists from the JPAC and the Armed Forces DNA Identification Laboratory also used mitochondrial DNA in the identification of the remains.

For additional information on the Defense Department’s mission to account for missing Americans, visit the DPMO Web site at http://www.dtic.mil/dpmo or call (703) 699-1169.

http://icasualties.org/oif/default.aspx
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Please remember to pray for the American soldiers stationed everywhere around the globe and especially in Iraq. Times have been and are very tough and it would be nice if you would all just say a prayer for their safety and for their families.
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Scheduled Activities
~~~
Columbia County Amateur Radio Club meets Every second Thursday @ 7:00 p.m. Union Street Station. And YOU'RE invited. Net is every Sunday at 20:30 on 147.105.
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MCC - "Faith Builders" Small group meets the second and fourth Tuesdays, 6:30 pm to 7:45 pm.
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MCC - Mom's Day Out - Every Tuesday and Thursday from 9 to 2.$10 for the first child, $5 for the second. Call 234-3225 for reservations.
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MCC - Nursing Home Ministry - Meadowbrook Every Tuesday from 10 to 11 am. Taylor, the last Thursday each month.
~~~
Men's Prayer Breakfast held every Tuesday morning at 6 AM in Miller's Cafeteria. If you aren't a regular participant at the Men's Prayer Breakfast, you're missing some great food, fellowship and inspired teaching of the Word. Hope to see you there.
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Emergency Phone Number 911
(Fire, Police, Ambulance, Sheriff, etc. )
Central Dispatch 234-5655
(Non - Emergency Number)
Direct Numbers
Ambulance - 234-7371 (24 Hour)
Jail - 234-5331 (24 Hour)
Poison Control - 800-222-1222 (24 Hour)
http://www. aapcc. org/
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"There is not enough darkness in the world to put out the light of one candle."
"Laugh whenever you can and cry if you need to." -- "Bug"
"I read the end of the book. We win!" -- "Bug"
"We may not be able to cure the world, but we don't have to make it sicker." -- "Bug"
"There just ain't enough fingers for all the holes in the dike." - - "Bug"
"It's no big deal doing what God tells you to do. A big deal would be NOT doing what God tells you to do. Just ask Jonah." - - Paul Troquille
"A simple way to take measure of a country is to look at how many want in ... and how many want out." - - Tony Blair
"Information is the currency of democracy." - Jefferson
~~~~~
Hope you enjoy the newsletter.
Again, thanks to all our contributors this week.
God bless and GOD BLESS AMERICA!!!
http://www.e-min.org/
God is Good and Faithful CU 73 IC JFM CSP NREMT-I KC5HII

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